WHATS THE BIG PROBLEM

Oh hunny do I ever know , lol.

I'm 27 and I have a 14 yr old. Now before someoe dies of heart failure , no I wasnt pregnant at 13 , He is my stepson and he is as much my own as my son. All in total there are 4 kids. And when people asks me how many kids i have and ages i tell them I have 4 , ages 14 , 13 , 10 and 6. I may have only given birth to the 6 yr old , but imagine being 27 and dragging 4 kids around a store with half of em yellin MOM! lol Oh it makes me giggle the looks I get.

I have to agree with you Dannii, i had my first baby at 16 and my second when i was 17.  I'd often receive unwanted comments from strangers especially older people.  My babies weren't planned but they weren't unwanted either.  The worst part was the way i was treated by the midwives in hospital with my first baby, especially when i couldn't breastfeed and at that age felt very uncomfortable with midwives trying grab my boobs and shove them in my baby's mouth  UGH! I still shudder when i think of the looks they gave me.  The things is i know i did a good job with my babes, they're now 8 and 9 years old and perfectly happy and healthy and i honestly believe that some teenage mothers are better mothers than the older ones, age does not change the way you feel about the little life you have created and nurtured. I am now 26 and have an 8 week old baby boy, it's nice not to have to prove myself to anyone this time.......

As far as the money (baby bonus) is concerned, how far do people think it can't stretch, babies are expensive and thats where all your money goes, i really don't think there are that many women who deliberately fall pregnant, endure the pregnancy for 9 months and go through childbirth just for the cash! 

I don't see a problem in teens having children. Some teens are better mums than mums in their 20's and up. I guarantee you will be an excellent mum, and be proud of who you are, and your baby. Dont worry about what other people say, or the way they look at you. They've got nothing better to do than bitch and make rude comments. If you're ready to have a baby at 17, then go ahead and have a baby, and good luck. I know from what i've read and seen about you on minti, you'll be a great mum. Just ignore all the negativity in the real world. It's not worth it. You go girl, and be happy. I was a teen mum also, and went through EXACTLY what you went through. If you need to chat, minti mail me ok. Hugs to you.

Hey Dannii, I think that ALL pregnant mums feel this way at sometime.  No matter what age you are, people seem hell bent on giving you unsolicited advice, and making comments that are not only insensitive, but invasive and rude... I seriously don't think they mean to do it, you should feel sorry for them for their misguided ignorance and be glad that you are you, and not them

Dannii,  The problem isn't you and young mothers like you.  You seem to be well educated, informed and well spoken as well as very much prepared to be a mother.  I am a high school teacher in Louisiana.  I see countless girls get pregnant every year with no support from the boy/man who got them pregnant, no support from their parents or too much support from their parents.  And by too much support I mean, taking on too much responsibility in raising the child (these teens never miss a new movie, dance, party, etc., cause gramma is always available).  I don't know about the other moms out there, but what was the last movie you went to see.  The girls I teach think that a baby will fill some void they have, but don't realize the responsibility of being a parent.  Babies are selfish...it's all about them and unforturnately, so are most teens.  Both can't be selfish and most of the time it's the child that pays the price. 

I think you are an execption to this.  You sound like you are ready and have the support of your partner. Good luck and don't worry about the stares.  Soon no one will be looking at you!.. Just your sweet baby!

Kerri

Take no notice of what anyone says dannii its your life, not theres and you make a good mum. Tell them to take a hike, they make me sick quick to jump when girls in teens, what about older women? nxt  time stare them out

young mum's do great jobs and it is unfair that some people judge.

they shouldn't they need to look at their own lives and concentrate on that before criticising anyone elses life choice!

i think you're going to be a fab mum, take care hun, lol lisa xxxx.

Hi dannii

I know how u feel, I fell pregnant at 15 and you can just imagine the looks I got, at that time the money from the gov. wasnt nearly as big so i didnt really cope the whole having kids for money thing i just got frowned apon alot and all that did was push me to be the best mum i could to prove them all wrong! In doind so i burnt myself out because i refused help from anyone for fear of looking useless. 7 years on i am pregnant with my third and I think Im a great mum but sadly i still get the same looks that I got at 15, now im nearly 23....

My confidence is stronger now and i dont care what these sceptical rude basterds (excuss language pls) think but i angers me that there are so many judgemental people out there.

I hope you dont get treated this way to often and pls dont let it get you down.

xoxo

Hi

I never had my own daughter untill i was 21but i took my step daughter on at 13 months when i was 18 the looks i would get looking so young wtih a toddler in the buggy 18 years old then of course when i had my daughter i was looked at like crap why i look not a day over 20 and i have 2 kids people make assumptions instead of knowing the truth for all they know the child could have been born due to a attack what do they know ? great advice

thanks for sharing this

Luv Emz xx

I agree with you that noone has the right to judge you for the decisions that you have made. My little sister fell pregnant at 16 and gave birth at 17. Her son is now a very happy healthy 6 year old. Dont get me wrong, she has had her fair share of crap over the years, she is no longer married to the father of her son, she has had to sell the house they bought together and she is now living with a man who i believe is far too old for her... BUT, she is a fantastic mother!!! Her son started kindy this year and got moved up to year 1 work because the kindy stuff was too easy, he is smart because she spends all her time with him. She reads to him, she plays with him and she loves him with every ounce of her heart and soul.

Dont let people's comments get you down. You're age doesnt matter. If you dont want to party like a maniac, travel (alone) or have a career yet, then thats all that matters.

I believe that some people are put on this earth to be parents. I have partied, i have traveled, but i have always known that i am meant to be a mum. And now that i am, i am happier with my life than ever before.

Good on you for having a great outlook on your pregnancy at a young age. BUT a good life skill to learn is to not take everything so personally. I learnt a great lesson when I was pregnant with my first one, as yet unmarried, young, and buying some things, and thought that a sales assistant was giving me the dirtiest, most derogatory look, and looking down her nose at me.. Turns out she had recently just had a miscarriage and was a little depressed. I know it is not the ideal situation for someone working with baby stuff but it happens. She was not looking down on me, she was depressed and a little jealous.

Everyone is going to have differing opinions of a very young mother. You will more than likely experience it all through the years of your child growing up as well. But there are also a lot of people out there who will admire you for the great job that you do with that child. Focus on the positive, not the negative. It is not good for you or the child you are carrying. Learn to laugh at people who make snide remarks. Show them that they don't hurt you, for then it loses all power.

Cheers

Look it doesnt only go your way hunni! older mums get it too. And yes you are right as long as you are doing the right thing it shouldnt  matter to others. It wont be easy as you think its going to be! but that doesnt make you a bad mummy. I would advise that young ladies should wait at the end of the day it you choice and you are the one that has to live with your decision. Dont let other people get to you walk with your head up high hunni.

hugs and kisses

I  feel for you . people are so so judgemental. jumping to conclusions. facial expressions the works!!! i find that these people are ignorant of a lot of things in life.People  like this usually only see things black and white and the worst thing is that they have made up their minds about a situation in their own heads and believe its true!!!

They also believe they are never wrong!   cheers annie