It's often easier for a woman to bond with the baby. Why? Because she is after all, the one who's carrying the baby, so the concept of becoming a parent may be easier for her to get used to. For the partner however, it may not be as easy to

Here are a few simple ways that can help you (the partner) to adapt to the change:

• Talk to friends or other fathers about their experiences and what it was like for them. This may help you to understand what its like, not only from a partners point of view, but from a womans perspective also.
   
• If possible, attend ultrasound appointments. This can be such a powerful and emotional experience for many.... seeing their baby on the screen for the first time.... it's a very special moment
   
• If you are in any way worried about what is going to happen during labour and birth or feel you can't be there for your partner... talk to her about it and voice your concerns. See if you can strike some sort of compromise and maybe even seek some advice from a community midwife etc. remember... it's ok to be frightened of the risks during labour and birth but the best thing you can do to free yourself from worry is to talk.... especially if you're going to be a parent for the first time.
   
• Get involved with the pregnancy and preparation for the baby. Feel the baby kick and move any chance you get. Attend antenatal/ birthing classes with your partner. Go shopping for baby stuff and pick out baby toys and clothes etc. Also, when booking into the hospital for when the time comes, ask if you can have a tour of the birthing suite and maternity ward.

My partner is going to be a dad for the first time in about a week and he is really starting to get nervous about it as apart from my daughter, he has never really had any experience with babies or really young children. He has helped with clothes shopping (not that we needed to buy many clothes), attended antenatal appointments, ultrasounds and also feels the baby kick and move about. This has helped him to adapt to the change of there being a new life coming into the world and so i thought that by sharing this, perhaps it would reach out to others and help others whether it be the first second or third time in dealing with adapting to the change!

Cheers