Relationship Help

Re: relationship help
anonymous

Question:
 

well where to start, I said in the heat of the moment that i didnt like my hub anymore, I love him i just dont feel the same way. I feel like im the last to be thought of in my family, im the cook,the cleaner etc but not me. Im not exactly into sex, as i tried to talk to hub and say for women its a mental thing so can we try a bit of romance to help me, he responses with we need to have sex for me to get romance, so its a bad circle. As im stubborn and he is always "right" i now give in an do whatever he wants through our wkend to save arguement, i was once a strong out going person now i feel like i would get in "trouble" we used to have fun. I have an 9mths old, its not his fault. My hub is 10yrs older too, we have been together 9yrs but its not i seem to be resenting him. Im putting this here as you dont know either of us and it could be better that way for an honest answer. He is a great man, im a good person, he thinks life is perfsct im not so sure.

Thank you for readin and your help. ive gone anon cause freinds are in here to

My Advice:

 

1st of all you have done the right thing by reaching out to someone for help. It is a hard thing to do sometimes but the benifits are usually worth the effort.

The fact that you told your Hubby how you feel should be reason enough for him to stop and think about your relationship.

Most men only use the whole romance thing to get into your pants and from then on just expect sex from thier wife.

For me it is similar to you as my wife is in a wheelchair and sometimes we may go an entire year without "making love" and when we do we are limited to what we can do. It worries my wife as she does get quite horny from time to time and she would love to please me at her expense but For me sex is but a small part of our friendship/marriage.

Let him know how you feel and that there is a problem, if he is as great as you say, he will be willing to do/try anything to make you get your self esteme back. Writing love letters to each other, poems, random gifts, and the like should help.

Think about foreplay, it can be a benifit to you both.

My wife and I also invested in some DVD's to help us communicate and learn to keep loving each other whilst exploring life together. The DVDs are sexual but they are tasteful and far from being the stuff many of us regard as PORN. A real eye opener.

Don't give up YOUR life to submit to his every whim...LOVE is a two way thing.

I am by far an expert on the topic but hope some of my ideas are helpful.

Thinking of you and looking forward to seeing how things go.

Robert.