How To Teach Your Child The True Value of Earning For Themselves

Anyone here filthy rich? Do you have money to just up and buy your child the best and most expensive thing out on the market just because they asked for it? I don't see any hands raised, so I must be in the right group here.

How many times

has your child run up to you and pointed out something Jane had and your child wanted? Now, you know that you can't afford it right now and may not be able to afford it any time soon. If fact, if you looked in your wallet at that very moment, your wallet would reach up and shut itself right in your face. Bet you never knew dust bunnies could grow in your wallet either.

My daughter had a girlfriend that was the daughter of her godparents. They were in the same boat as we were....empty wallets. It was a two parent household like ours, but they were still living paycheck to paycheck. My children had one grandparent, their grandfather and he was living on a pension. Things were tight for him as well. My daughter's friend had one grandparent also and he was retired, but had retired from Bethlehem Steel when retiring really was a good thing. He had invested his money and was doing quite well. He had the bucks to buy his grand-daughter anything she wanted, take her on trips to Disney World, pay for the school trips, and anything else she wanted. Should her parents have put limits on what grand-dad was doing? Probably, but that was a private issue that only they could handle.

My daughter was always upset because her friend had something new and she knew, after awhile it was no use in asking us. So, one day I sat her down. She was about 8-9 years old and asked her if there was one thing that her friend had, that she wanted, what would it be? At the time those text messaging toys were out on the market and all the kids were texting away.  That's what she wanted.  So, I pulled out a glass jar from the cabinet, took an index card and wrote on the card, "Kelly's  Special".  I told her that  jar would sit on the table in the kitchen.  I would put money into the jar from any cash that I was able to save from the grocery shopping. Dad was going to add to it, if he had money to spare after work. He was a cab driver.

If she wanted to do some extra chores and earn some money to add to the jar, then she was welcomed to do it. She thought I had lost my mind. She pointed out that Ali didn't have to work for her specials. I agreed with her and pointed out that Ali is missing out. She won't have the fun of going through the newspaper and looking for the sales that might be on the item. Ali was missing the fun of finally meeting the goal of what she could be saving up for. Ali wasn't going to have a special day when she can go to the store with the money in her hand and pick out the exact color of what she wanted. Ali was missing what a real surprise could be.

Kelly sat there and thought about it then she left the room. She came back with a little purse that she was saving her allowance in from her regular chores. She dumped in what she had. She had this big smile on her face and told me that she was kicking the "Kelly Special" off with her donation. She also wanted to know when the sales would be out in the paper and what extra chores was there for her to do?

In about a month there had been enough money where Kelly could buy what she wanted. We made a day out of it. Kelly had even learned what rebates were! She had found a notice in the paper for the toy store that she wanted to go to that was offering a rebate for the item if it was purchased on a certain day. She bought her text messaging toy, saved the receipt and sent it off in the mail that day. The check that she got back we cashed for her and she took that money and put it in the jar for her next "Kelly Special".

Sometimes, you have to just jump in with both feet and explain to your children what other families have others may not be able to have. It isn't a bad thing. Kelly learned that even though Ali was her friend, and had a grandfather that opened his wallet often, that not every child can have a grandfather that is so generous. Generosity is a good thing, but hard work and earning something on your own is a whole new kind of generosity. It's generosity of yourself. How generous or saving minded can you be to get something that you really want? Kelly learned that saving and working for something was being generous to herself and she's lived by that ever since.

DCMerkle