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The Invisible Man and The Child
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The Invisible Man and The Child

LisaPetrarca by LisaPetrarca Talking(May 17th) (rank 68th)

My true story below will hopefully offer advice that will help you and your children (through your example), reach out to others and make a difference.

Last Saturday my middle son Jullien really upset me when I picked him up. He said some pretty mean things to me, so I dropped him off at the house and just took off for some alone time (I needed to cry a little). I drove through Taco Bell, picked up some food and headed to a store where I was going to buy some crafts to make some Mother's Day gifts. I pulled up in front of the store and parked and just sat there eating.

As I looked around, (feeling a little sorry for myself), I noticed a guy with long tangled silver hair, a short white scraggly beard, an old black leather jacket, and torn blue jeans. He was standing up, leaning with his forehead pressed against the wall. I had some time to just observe while I finished my lunch, (which is very rare for me to have TIME). So I just watched, wondering if anyone would ask him if he was okay. The first couple that went by was probably in their 20's and didn't even glance in the man's direction. A couple of ladies in their thirties also proceeded to walk past the man, (who had not moved or changed positions for about 10 minutes), again not even a look towards him. The same thing happened about six more times. The way everyone just strolled by, made me wonder if the man was a figment of my imagination.

After about 20 minutes I got to the point that I was hoping and praying that someone would just LOOK at the man. With each new person I thought, "Surely they will at least see that he is there and may need help." Finally, a mother, with a short brown bob haircut, tan shorts, and a white floral blouse, and her daughter (about 3 years old), who looked like a miniature cut out version of the mother, went walking right past him. The mom seemed to notice the man only because her young daughter had lagged a little behind and she was concerned for her daughter's safety. The daughter on the other hand, seemed to notice that something was wrong with the man and stopped to stare at him. The mother quickly grabbed her daughter's hand and dragged her away, while the daughter continued to look back at the man.

Next, a cute, plump, elderly husband and wife in their 80's walked by, they too, both looked directly at the man and then continued to look as they walked by, with a quick glance back before they entered the store. The man had still remained in the same position. About 10 more people in their 20's, 30's and 40's passed the invisible man.

As I finished the last few bites of my burrito, I thought, "Why was the man only visible to the young and the elderly?" Were they the only one's that were not too busy to see another person who may be hurting? How had my generation become so insensitive and self absorbed that they could not even SEE someone who may need them?

I got out of my car, and headed towards the man. I stopped and said, "Is everything okay? Do you need some help?" He looked up from the wall, smiled a toothless grin and said, "I'm just trying to figure a few things out on this cell phone, but thanks anyways." I said, "Good luck, they can be a little tricky in the beginning, have a great day!" He said, "You got that right, thank you, you too!" He seemed so happy that someone had spoken to him. He continued to smile as I headed into the store.

The invisible man did not need my help today, but what if he had? Did it take a lot of effort on my part to look at him and see if he needed some assistance? I hope that we can be like the young children and the elderly....that we will be able to SEE someone directly in our path. You may be the one person who can brighten that persons whole day. It requires only a little effort, concern, and time....but the rewards you will receive from a simple smile on a sad, tired, broken face, is amazing! Go out and notice the invisible men and women standing right in front of you!

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Ravenheart
May 21st | Ravenheart
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

so true, im guilty of walking past people like that, i was brought up to stay away from strangers.. if it was a lady in need i may ask if she needed help but im weary of men. great advice

 



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      LisaPetrarca
May 22nd | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Me too!  My father was a police officer so I was extra cautious because of all the stories I heard daily.  I still make sure that I am in a safe and crowded environment when I approach someone (always with a safe enough distance between us). 



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Amerlinwinga
May 21st | Amerlinwinga
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

The generation has changed but i think it has too in some ways. The world was a safer one years ago not so much now. Some times just asking someone if they are ok can cause anger and people to be nasty and other times as you experienced it can make your or someone else's day. But if everyone one made that little effort maybe our world would be better.

Hugs Tee



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      LisaPetrarca
May 22nd | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

You're right, it can be dangerous...but I think everyone has can sense if they should stay far away or reach out.  I still never get too close if its a man and always make sure that it's in a public place.  Being a woman makes it a little more difficult to reach out but I think when we all use a little common sense (regarding the situation), then we will know whether to reach out or keep our distance.

Thanks for your input!



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alishas-mummy
May 19th | alishas-mummy
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

This article is so true, Lisa !!!

I especially loved this bit:
"You may be the one person who can brighten that persons whole day."

I always try to make people smile, and give them compliments..
Because, to you, it may mean nothing but only the truth...
But to them, it could mean the world :)

When I was studying Psychology, I learnt how the world is caring less for the world...
They always experience "the bystander effect", where they don't do anything to help those in need.. they just stand there and hope others will...
It's a sad thing :(
That's why, when I notice something bad going on, I will always come to the person's aid :)

Thank you for writing a wonderful and VERY TRUE article...

You should be proud of yourself for talking to that man..
A LOT of people would not do that.. but you did... and that makes me admire you so much :)

Great work, Lisa !!!

Love Thuy xox



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Thank you Thuy!  I know that it's hard to do but lately I've really felt like trying to step outside of my comfort zone and make a small difference to one person each day.  I hope to remind everyone else that it's not hard...just takes a little bit of awareness (slowing down and LOOKING).

 



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cassaustin
May 18th | cassaustin
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Great Article Lisa

I grew up in Sydney and there are thousands of invisible people there. I think my ignorance and lack of understanding of homeless people made me fear them. I was the sort of person who would walk on by. I would love to be able to teach my children that all people are equal and sometimes all it takes is a smile.

Cass xx



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

I used to feel the same way, but it seems like they are always right in front of me wherever I go lately...kind of like forcing me to see beyond my own fear.  It sure makes you feel better after you reach out to someone!!



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cazza
May 17th | cazza
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

This made me cry, as its so true we are all gulity of that, and its so sad.. Thank you for sharing this with us, and i always try and remind my children never judge a person on how they look..

xx cazza



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Thanks Cazza, and you're right...we are ALL GUILTY OF THIS.  Just hoping this will be a little reminder



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pavementcracks70
May 17th | pavementcracks70
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

invisible people are everywhere, streets, cafes, librabries, shopping centres, churches, nieghbours, family, and even here on minti.........food for thought.......lets reach out, listen and be a friend



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

SO TRUE!!  I love your input, thanks!



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emmie
May 17th | emmie
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Hi Lisa ,

Great advice its so sad this happens

Thanks for sharing it.

Luv Emz xxx



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Hi Emz,

I know I feel the same way...hope I helped others to reach out to someone each day!



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MrsSanders
May 17th | MrsSanders
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

Thankyou for sharing this insightful moment in your life. It is so true that we get wrapped in our own fears and concerns that humanity tends to take a back seat. There are way too many invisible people and one day for whatever reason any one of us could be amoung the invisable. Great reminder, thanks.

Luv Winnie.xxxx



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      LisaPetrarca
May 21st | LisaPetrarca
Re: The Invisible Man and The Child

I was close to being invisible when my husband left me and my kids and took all the money, luckily I had family, but I can see why so many people can end up in this situation.



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