Having a baby years apart

I had my first baby at 18 and it was a girl, then I had another baby at 20 and it was another girl... did i mind having two girls and not the pigeon pair everyone says is great?  Yes I did at first as my second baby Monique was

a horror baby, she cried continuously and I always felt guilty about wanting a boy and thought I had done something and she felt that I wanted a boy.  I ended up with postnatal depression to this day I have never gotten treatment I dealt with it.  Some days I have low but a lot of days are good.  As the years went by and my girls grew up I was so glad I had the girls instead of one each.  They can do stuff together and I hope they grow up close although at the moment I can't see that happening lol.  I have always had a tummy and I ended up working at woolworths.  I can't count the number of times customers used to say to me when is your baby due?  and the hurt I felt knowing I wasn't... I wasn't even trying.  In the end I got quite snappy and the last time a worker had said somthing i just told them where to go I got it from customers I didnt' need it from workers.  Anyway years later and I would get comments on when I was having another so I could get the boy and I would say I wouldnt' have another just for a boy but when I lost my job at the beginning of 2007 hubby and I thought maybe we should add to our family and it was a very hard decision.  My youngest was turning 8 adn I didnt' know how I would cope.  When I found out i was pregnant we were ecstatic it was like having our first all over again but with the joy (our first definatly wasn't planned and we werent together for long at that stage. This year 12 years together) anyway our friend had just gotten pregnant a few weeks before me and the comments I got after hearing when are you having another one the comments turned around and it was are you stupid your kids are at school...to do you want a boy...to at the end oh my god you are having twins and you are doing it for the money.  1st I didnt' care that the kids were at school if we decided we were going to have another it was always going to be like that 2nd No we didnt' want a boy it was a nice surprise and i wouldnt' have it any other way now but then I would of been happy to have another girl I knew how to look after them lol.  3rd and yes I was big Kaleb was 9lb 4oz and no there was no twins obviously and 4th no way did i do it for the money considering that small amount doesn't look after the child for long.  People are stupid if they think that.

Anyway my advice was supposed to be for having a baby years apart and I tell you what I have never had so much pain in my life.  I got sciatica in both legs and couldn't walk very much and when i did it was painful, I was ever so tired my poor girls couldnt' even get stories read and if they wanted them they would have to lay in bed with me and yes as I said I was huge and always got pains.  My whole body ached pretty much the whole 9 months and even after the midwife had pushed my leg that hard i had to drag it along after the birth for about 3 days then I came home and was just about better with my stomach my girls had to go a couple doors down where a savage dog is and all i heard was screaming and the dog and flew out the door thinking they were getting attacked. No they werent' the dog gave them a fright and by the time i bolted out the door they were home laughing and I was in soooo much pain my back throbbed, my stomach all torn again but in saying all that I would never ever give my baby back he has brought so much joy to my husband and I and both the girls.  I'm sure we will have our times when he is bigger and getting into a lot more mischief but again I just feel so much love and patience since he has been born he has been such a good thing for us.  I would say to anyone who has older children and thinking about another GO FOR IT it gives you so much joy it can't be explained.  I know this is probably boring advice but I just want to encourage anyone thinking about it after a big gap its great.