Starting your child in child care for preparation for Kinder

Well - this was a very long process for me as my first daughter, almost 3 yrs of age now, was very clingy to me.  My parents told me that she wouldn't handle going to kinder if I didn't try and break her away from me.  It was so

bad earlier on that she didn't want to spend time with grandparents/ other family members and particularly outsiders who had come to visit ( like co-workers/friends ).  I moved to Melbourne recently so that I could be closer to family, and that Sophie and Madeleine ( who I was pregnant with prior to moving ), could get to know their cousins and uncles/aunties.  To start off with, she would hide, or want to be picked up by me.  One of my sister in laws told me that her neighbours son had been like Sophie, and when they tried Kinder with him, he spent the whole time crying and working himself up so much that he would vomit - so his mum would take him home.  I didn't want Sophie to be like that, so I looked into various day cares as well as occasional care places.  At first it was extremely hard .  I placed her in an occasional care centre and as soon as I would try to leave, she would cry and say " Sophie come to?".  I wanted so much to pick her up and take her with me, but knew that it wouldn't help the situation.  So I had to leave her there crying.  After 3 weeks in this particular center there wasn't any improvement. They would call me to pick her up as she wasn't able to console.  I'd arrive and she would be standing behind one of the carers with tears down her face.  All that would dissappear on my arrival.  The carers at this centre were on the youngish side and I don't think they tried everything they could have done to settle her.  So I moved her into the same occasional care place as my nephew ( as she knew him - so I thought that might help).  The main carer at this centre told me that I had to be really strict.  I was to leave her for just 1 hour for the first 3 weeks and then slowly increase the time she was there.   She would take Sophie from me each week ( even though she would still cry) and sit with her/ read books etc.  They took photos to show me how she settled ( so I would know that she didn't spend the whole time crying).  It was nice to pick her up and find her not crying. After about 7 weeks, and her attending for 2 hours, I went to pick her up one day and she wouldn't come home.  I knew then that she was ready to stay the full 3 hours. 

Now she can't wait to go !  So, for those out there having the same problems - you have to be strict with yourself as it is so easy to not want to see them cry.  That boy that used to vomit in Kinder - he is now at school, has his own special teachers aide who sits with him, and they have a vomit bucket for him just inside the classroom door.  I am glad I did something about it now, otherwise that could have been her in a couple of years time!

So - if you have a really clingy child, then I do suggest that you try and break it.  And the best advice to give is to stick with it - just do as I did and start of with a short amount of time and then slowly increase it.  If you could have seen her when I first started, you would not believe it is the same child today.  She can't wait to spend time with other family members now - and that also gives me a break. :)