The Art of Listening

Listening is a really important ability as a parent. When babies and children are non-verbal, we listen to their cues and body language and their sounds. As they begin to talk we interpret their words and actions. Being able to listen to the emotional content of children without reacting is crucial to emotional development. For example if your child says something you find offensive, don't react but reflect back their emotional state and ignore the offensive words (until later). For example: 'You are really furious' rather than "Don't speak like that to me" Once things have calmed down you can talk about language and what is appropriate but when the emotional temperature is high, listening is the key. There are many examples I can think of where parents might not listen effectively. Eating Sleeping Homework School Bullying Friendships We can tend to lecture or advise or order children to behave in a certain way without sometimes being mindful of their needs or emotional state in the situation. There are some great books which teach effective communication and help to get 'to the bottom' of problems children might be having. "How To Talk So Kids Will Listen" "Parent Effectiveness Training (PET)" "Siblings Without Rivalry" Google effective communication and see what you come up with. Happy Listening