Having Babies while still a teen

Teelah you sound like a delightful person who has over come many many issues far beyond your friends lives. Congratulations on thinking before you act. I too came from a troubled childhood of which I had accepted at your age, but it was not until I had time to age that I actually understood the affects it had taken on me. Don't get me wrong I'm still a functional and successful person, I guess you could say I did not fit the stereotype of bad childhood, too early adult responsibilities and therefor messed up person as a result -  sounds like you are the simular.  Yet i did come to recognise  I had self esteem issues, needed to be loved ( I was trying to forfil a lacking I never received) , ect ect. Enjoy your early life, honestly there is no rush. Having a child to love and love you in return actually does not fill that void of those things you missed out on,  time and learning to love yourself will. Most of all enjoy your youth, you have plenty of time to get old. It's time for you sweet heart , you don't need to look after anyone else but you right now.  Well done what a wonderful person you must be.

Thanks for sharing this advise. Myself being 16yo i would not think about having children right now. I see my sister who was a older mum and see how life with children can be great and i see my friend with child not having a life and trying to find care for him so she can have a life.

We all try to tell her she was too young and she decided that she still wanted a child and she is struggling even with help from parents and friends.

But i have another friend that had her 1st child at 17yo and she is a wonderful mother and doesn't miss any part of her life she was just born to be a mum. Everyone is different.

Anneka

Good advice... Taleah may be quite capable of being a great mum, but why rush it?  Learn from the mistakes of other's and take their advice since you have the opportunity.  Once you are a parent, the responsibility lasts forever and freedom is a thing of the past.

So right.  Having children is really tough.  Teenagers might think they are ready to have a baby, but in truth, a lot aren't.  They need to find stability in themselves and have support and finances sorted before they think of bringing another human into this world.  Some teens make great parents, but most of them haven't planned on having a baby.

I was 18 when I first got pregnant, sadly, lost that one, and this baby was conceived on the pill.  When I miscarried, I was upset, but I was also relieved at the same time.  I was not ready to bring a baby into this world as I hadn't found myself properly.

 I totally totally agree. I am raising a little baby now after raising 2 (now pretty much grown) stepchildren and I can tell you no matter how involved you were with the others, having one of your own is completely different, and not always better or easier. Also, with a 20 year gap between the kids I am also amazed at how much more I am able to give to the youngest since we now in a better place emotionally, financially, socially and experience-wise. When I was much younger I think more of my desire to have kids came from wanting to be loved back than it is now, and I am so glad I waited through that because now I realize having a child is about what you can give to them, not the other way around. I know a few couples who have decided to wait 5 years after they were married to have kids, just so that they have time to get to know each other as a couple before the added pressures of having a child come into play. They have all been glad they did. As you know, this world is hard enough, as a mother, you want to do everything you can to give your child the best start possible, sometimes even if that means waiting a little for a better time.