motherly love discipline and boundaries

there have been so many things happening in the world lately so many innocent people getting hurt and being in the wrong place and at the wrong time.

yes there are are lot of psychological problems in the world and yes the system is letting people down.

but

its a viscious circle that needs to be broken and we need to get to the "grass roots " of these problems. im not pointing the finger here but we as parents need to lay the foundations from a very early age for our babies.

its great having a baby but along with it comes responsibility. not only do we need to care and love our children but we need to "teach them values and set boundaries"

so many times parents allow children to run amok and think its so cute but whilst its also not good to have child sit still in achair like a robot and not making any noise so too its bad if a child is running amok and not having boundaries . then when parents do get fed up and try to discipline their children they are "upset ' because the child wont listen.

well what do you expect if as a parent you are sending out mixed signals yesterday the child was allowed to do something that was naughtier than today so "why am i getting told off and screamed at?" he thinks to himself

parents need to work as a team this is the hard bit. because whether your in or out of a relationship if your own relationship isnt working like communication breakdown being the key here then its hard to "strive what you are trying to achieve" but the key here is that strive you need to rather than giving up.

striving doesnt mean blaming the partner it just means to quietly try to achieve this on your own as best as possible. whilst you might think that a child isnt listening or relating to it as they get older and they start revealing things and values that you have taught them you will be amazed.

we only have to look at our forefathers parents and grandparents. not all relationships were compatable but they "stayed for the families sake" (im not saying one should stay or one should go from a relationship) im just stating  afact that used to happen. the mother would be the core or the the heart and build the foundations of the family.

a child whilst they love their fathers do look for the mothers love and nurturing so its important that those of us that are mothers to do our best and try to "give " to our children.

this is where "materialistic " things come into this whilst its great to provide for our child all the latest materialistic items our children "deep down" crave our love and most importantly our understanding.

boudaries should be fair and life needs a balance. for example we see parents trying to do the right thing and have their children eat "healthy" but be realistic and make sure its balanced. for example whilst sugar is bad for you the body still raves a little sugar. you cannot totally do away with it.  my friend had arelatives ten year old come over and she has had her sleep overnight since she was a baby the girl was craving sugar because she isnt allowed to eat anything at all with sugar. the mother even went through the bin to make sure that she didnt give her any snacks or things with sugar .

with discipline make sure that the child knows why they are being disciplined and make sure with that opportunity that they are told why that was so wrong and explain some alternatives that appear right dont just make it black and white if there are grey ares explain that also but do go by their ages as some children might just find it too complicated. but as they grow you grow with your explanations.

children need us mothers more than some realise

i hope this helps some mothers and remember dixcipline and boundaries dont have to be done in an angry voice or shouting. a child will listen more when we are calm and  we are confident in what we are telling them  we as mothers are there to protect and teach our children and most important to "love them"

in the long run this is the best "love us mothers can give

cheers annie