Have you ever noticed how much easier it is to tell other people how to be a good parent
Before you have children of your own
Yes as soon as you become a parent
Everything changes
All those things you swore you would never do
You suddenly find yourself doing
Just to find that 5 minutes peace and quiet to yourself !!!!!
I used to find it funny, how many times some of the friends I had with no children, would look at me and my children and you could hear the machinations of their mind, they believed I was doing it all wrong !!!!
They believed that when they had children of their own, they would be such a great parent as they would learn from the mistakes of others
Jump forward a few years and there they are with children of their own, reacting in the exact same way as all other parents
"The little things don't always matter after all"
"I just wanted to have some peace!!"
"Yes, I know what I said but it doesn't really hurt to spoil them !!"
I've heard all these phrases and many more !!!!!!
Ultimately this all just reinforces my principal belief in parenting, listen to your own instincts, don't let others guide you into doing something or saying something you don't necessarily agree with !!!
I remember when I had my daughter, I hadan elderly Health Visitor, who had never married, never had children, she was an only child and so didn't even have the joy of being an Aunt..... and all her knowledge in parenting came from books. She came to my home once and my daughter was sleeping in the bedroom, we chatted for a while, then I had to get my daughter for a check up so I walked to the bedroom, picked her up and carried her into the Health Visitor........to be met by a gasp of horror!!!!!! What had I done??? It seems that I had taken my baby from one room temperature to another room temperature without first wrapping her in a shawl to hold the heat in !!!!
Can you imagine????? I spent a long time behaving one way in front of the Health Visitor and then a "normal" way when she wasn't around !!!!!!!
We have also all experienced those moments when we are in town and our darling child has a tantrum, you look around and you see the whole episode is drawing a crowd.....What do you do???? By now most of the people standing around and looking in horror at this "problem" child with the "inexperienced" mother who can't control their own child!!!! Nine times out of ten we all react in the same way, we are embarrassed and lose our temper with the child to try and regain credibility, only to find those same people are now looking at your child in sympathy....it was only a tantrum after all !!!!
Sometimes you just can't win, However you react you will always have those that say you did the right thing and there is likely to be a lot more saying you did the wrong thing !!!!!!
The only important thing is :
we know our child the best
don't be influenced by the reactions of others.
Follow your own instincts.
Also remember that when you are asking others for advice, you are only asking their opinon, they may not be right !!!!!!
Always balance everything with advice, opinions and what your heart is telling you
(August 19th) (
