The first six weeks of motherhood can be tough going - but  we know youll come through smiling

Having a baby is really exciting! But what noone that stops you in the street to goo all over how big your belly is will tell you is that its

EXHAUSTING and OVERWHELMING!  Yes, those early days a re hectic and they do test you. but they wont last forever, and you never fail :)

Be realistic

a baby disrupt the mose organised houseold- take each day as it comes. if you dont do the dises for a week- forget it. chances are your partner will do it for you anyway :)

Accept that you will be tired. and emotional. dont set yourself unrealistic targets. sleep all the time you can. getting dressed by lunchtime may feel a major acheivment. and if you would rather stay in your pjs all day, whats stopping you? i use any excuse no to get dressed :)

Easy does it.

Everyoen from your mum to your midwife will tell you to rest. and sleep when your baby sleeps. although many of us just ignore it, because we are going to be great mums and have our perfectly neat house with vacuum track still in teh carpet. try not to be so stubborn :) the chances are when your baby sleeps youll do the washing up instead, but you really do need tha sleep!

A rested mum is more capable of coping with a new baby. early bed times help as well!

Feeding

How you feed your baby is your decision. you will be told by EVERYONE that breast is best. it  doent come naturally to everyone. so there is NO PRESSURE. you do what you have to do- whats best for you AND baby! if you try and it doesn't work out- no worries, the alternatives are good too!

Help

I know i keep saying it. YOU ARE NOT SUPERWOMAN.(ALTHOUGH MANY OF US LIKE TO THINK WE COULD BE!)

Accept offers of help. if someone suggests babysitting, thank them. suggest they could do some housework instead. there was an advice about giving food- a fantastic idea! i dont know how to link the page though- if any one can help me do this it would be grteat! forget the housework. prioritise- spending tiem with your little angel is more important than the ssmell coming from the garbage bin :)

Dont forget about you!

It is called labour for a reason! it s hard work, and takes r ecovery time. if you have had stitches take a warm bath. even ten minutes will ehlp, and it will help oyu relax a little :)

Visiting permits

of course you want to show off your new babym but dont underestimate how tiring visiors can be! try to limit the amount in the first few days, and put people off if you dont feel up to it. (he is puking everywhere- and he has this diarrhoea it smells like ten year old sewage, but come on over  ill let you look after him while i make us some coffee...)  Its not like your baby is going anywhere! :) there is no rush. make sure that if you have an answering machine, it is switched on at all times. if not, leave the phone off the hook so you can get some rest. i always got up to answer it and it was always a telelmarketer :S

Baby blues

msot mums experience the post baby blues a few days after the baby is born. this is normal. it is different than PND. if your symptoms last over than a week, talk to your GP. occassionly the blues develop into post natal depression. Pnd effects about 10% of new mums. Help is available and your not alone. a lo tof mums are too scared to admit they ahve pnd. its not an illness or disease, and is perfectly ntural.

Love

Dont feel bad if you dont fall in love with your baby instantly. or if you resent your neworn for the demands she is making on you. it takes time to get over labour, and time to bond with your baby. but it will ahppen soon and you wouldnt be able to imagine life without her.

Dads

Dads are usually feeling like a third wheel throughout the most of the pregnancy. sure they can read the books. they can chose the names. but they cant take the pain from your spine  or your ribcage when your in pain, they cant drain your feet that look like they are being possessed by the stay puff'd marshmellow man, and worst of all. he has to watch you go trhough that incredible labour and CANT STOP IT!  Tell the m what they can do, jsut to mske the mfeel useful if nothing else.  they really odo want t oehlp, and its not their fault its the women who go through everything. its an emoional and scary time for them too. men can al so get post natal depressoion!

Out and About

your first trips out will feel like your organising a miltary operation but they get easier. keep first outing short and on foot. your liekly to feel protective of your tiny baby. feed bubs neforwe you leave so youve got time before te menuis opened again, so to speak. take a change bag with you to cover all eventualities. sespesially a change (or 2) of clothes. use the scout's motto. be prepared.

Friends

try and make new friends with bubs around the same age as yours, you will feel better knowing your not the only one surviving on four hours sleep a night, if you dont have a support network of mums (like minti!) try contacting a playgroup. your old friends may nbot understand the time a bub consumes jsut to go out and havea cifee, but try to everynoe and then, they also may not understand your new desire to dsicuss all things poop. and may actually find it gross.

Advice

Advice will come at you from left right up down and back to front. everyone has someting to say about new borns. there is no such thing as an average baby. what works for one may not (and probably wont!) work for another. some cry more, some sleep more, its not your fault,. their made to be individual from the beginning :) listen to advice, but be selective. try waht yo uthink might work for you. for isntance. there was no way i was listening to the old lady telling me to dip the dummy in boiled vegemite. crepy.

Your partner

He needs time too! finding alone time for the two of you can be hard. sorry, it WILL be hard! accept that your relationship will cahnge, try to make him feel involved. if you rpartner has had little involvement with young children the best way to involve him is to teach him everythign you know :) put him in charge of bathtime and take a rest :) make time to talk to him , let him know how your feeling (i still have trouble with this) you both need time to adjust. it may seem he has it easy going to work everyday, but his life has canged too, and he misses out on all thsoe smiles :)

Always on my mind

you may not be rpepared for the worry that come s with motherhood  is you baby feeding enough. is she still breathing. an should her poop really be that colour? its normal and will get better with time. keep a notepad to jot down any questions no matter how bi or small to ask your nurse GP or ohter professional. its what there there fore.and remember the ony stupid questions are the ones that you dont have an answer to because you didnt ask :) dont expect to remember the questions (or the answers!) as your memory still isnt back to speed yet.

The first smile.

At this point, you will find that all the stress and poop is worth it :)