Put your hand up if your guilty of throwing a temper tantrum recently? *raises hand*

So you think you don't have temper tantrums.. think again... Maybe it's when your driving and some idiot  pulls out or doesn't indicate and you go off at them, or beep your

horn furiously? Or maybe it's when you kick you toe for the tenth time in one day and hop around on one leg yelling and screaming? Or maybe it's a little more subltle like searching through your handbag for your ringing mobile and cursing that you can never find it? 

In some way or another we all do it. I am yet to meet a person who is completely temper free...

Temper tantrus no matter how big or how small are the humans way of dealing with frustration and disappointment and anger!

So before we deal with our childs tantrums take a minute to look at how we react to situations and what our children see.. maybe we could change the way we act to help them learn the correct calm way to react in hard situations. Temper is a not so nice part of human nature, but, a part none the less. Our children learn their behaviours from the people around them and through socialising with other children.

Once we as parents or guardians realise that we to are guilty of these tantrums we can see that our children don't do it simply to annoy us or get under our skin.. they just need to be shown a different more possitive way of dealing with these emotions.

Something like a whopping 80% of "toddlers" (kids aged between 16 months and 4yrs) have temper tantrums so don't feel alone!

There are a few TRIGGER things that can set of or increase your chances of your child throwing a tantrum. Things like :

• Being tired
• too much sugar
• over stimulated
• out of routien
• hunger
• fear and the main one
• FRUSTRATION

Before planning your day try to eliminate these things to decrease your chances of having to deal with a grumpy child. Make sure your child has a healty diet, plenty of sleep and try to stick to a routien even if its only eating at the same time everyday or close enough.

Teaching our children how to handle tough situations or emotional experiences is one of the most important things we can teach our children. How they deal with these things will effect them in their adulthood! If you give in to their demands they will go on thinking that tantrums are the way to get what you want and thats not WHAT you want a teenager to think lol.

Heres a few things we can do to deal with and prevent temper tantrums

• BE CONSISTANT
• Be true to your word, follow through with punishments
• Talk to your child about how to express their feelings, I teach my girls to say "stop I dont like it", when they are being bullied, instead of running of crying or getting angry back.
• Have food and drink on hand incase you need a distraction
• NOTICE and PRAISE good behaviour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• Stay calm, don't show your child that they are going to get want they want or that they have control over your moods! (even tho they do sometimes)
• Be firm, get down to eye level and speak firmly and seriously.
• I can't say this enought FOLLOW THROUGH with any threats of punishments made.

If your in a shop or public place and its getting out of hand just leave! If it means u leave behind a shopping trolley full of food, well so be it. If they need a time out they need a time out, you could even ask the shops to hang on to it for you. Don't feel embarresed I know people will look and stear, it's human nature, but most parents will have gone through the same thing so don't worry and who cares what they think you will probably never see them again anyway.

Some days I used to feel like I just couldn't cope because where ever I went my daughter would sit down and throw a tantrum and I felt so embaressed and felt like I had failed as a mum, BUT once I started following through with threats of time out and punishments and once I made sure she has a healtier diet and more sleep things got alot easier.

I hope this helps someone!!

xoxo

Written By Ravenheart 09