Hi...I have two children (9yrs n 4yrs) both will not go to public toilet or at school to used the toilet for number 2, but they have finally using the toilets for number 1...(both refused to used toilet at all, unless it was at home).

My 9yr old son was the worse in toilet we would have arguments and bribe with toys he likes...specially the first two years of school will not at all go to toilet for 1-2 till he was at home.

What my solution was for number 2 was put it into a routine with our morning schedule, straight after breakfast have sent them to do number 2 and told them to bring a book and sit there for atleast 10minutes which the book used to distract them, and it work...No more stomach ache and constipation or accidents in pants... Used a distraction in front of them to sit in the toilet or count the tiles.. GOOD LUCK.. hope this will help you..

Children learn and develope at different rates.  Having said that, our reactions are what imprint on them as to what is and what isn't good.  Making a big deal of him not pooing in the toilet is only going to make him more self concious about the matter.

Concentrate on his weeing for now.  There are pull up pants out there for children his age for accidents.  Slowly introduce the concept of pooing on the toilet, and as all kids are 'monkey see, monkey do', it might help him to see you or your partner pooing on the toilet too, especially seeing as he is intellectually delayed.

The most important thing to remember is to control your own reactions to the accidents.  Explain to him that they do happen, but you would like him to try pooing on the toilet next time.  Keep your voice light and clean up as though it were nothing to worry about.  Grumbling over cleaning up is going to upset him more, because he will feel he has displeased you.

I don't know much about toilet training, but thought I'd share this. Toilet training works best when doing well is rewarded and failure is handled matter of factly.

I tend to be strong willed in many ways... the answer isn't breaking that will, it's tempering it. So, instead of preasuring the child, which makes them less likely to do it, you encourage them to do what's right. Let your child know how happy you'll be if they get it right, that you'll be so pleased with them! Perphaps that may help... again, I'm no expert!

Iamschild.