Hi there,

My 2 cents worth - if there is PTSD in the picture, would there be any chance of having them see a Counsellor with regards to the PTSD? Something like CBT might help and getting help with the PTSD might just open their minds enough to see what is happening with their little one, ie, CBT helps you to modify your own behaviour patterns. If this were to be achieved, perhaps the person with PTSD might modify their own behaviour with treatment and then be able to modify the child's as well once they are through their own crisis.

Good luck,

Kelly

I have to agree with your first responder that there is very little anyone can do to change someone else's behavior.   However, could it be that your friend is uncertain how to correct her child's behavior?  I don't know how you have approached her to date, but maybe you have said "you shouldn't let him do that" or "I never let my Johnny do this"?  Possibly you are close enough friends that you could demonstrate some appropriate action? 

We had some close friends who had an out of control 2 year old.  At one point this child spit in my face  when I was playing with her!  Her parents started with this whiny voiced "no, no, Coley, don't do that."  I picked her up, walked her into another room, sat her on a chair, and told her she couldn't get up until she was ready to apologize and act properly.  No one was more surprised than her parents when she did exactly that.   I would like to say that was a turning point for this child but it took having a sister and her continued insistence that she at the age of 3 should be responsible for the care of the baby for the parents to finally take control.  Good news - she turned out fantastic so don't worry about your friend's child.  There is still hope.

Sorry to say but there isn't a way. You said yourself, she refuses to listen. Different parents have different parenting methods and so long as the child isn't being harmed or neglected there isn't really anything you can do other than accept she has different parenting abilities or stop being friends.