You say that you have only spoken to your sons partner  once....I am gathering you have not even seen your grandchild. this is sad.

You don't say what  your son abuses you about when you call. Did something happen in the past to cause this friction between you & your son.??? 

I think all you can do, when talking to your son....is keep  letting  him know you want to be  apart of  their lives, in turn  be apart of your grandchild's life....if this is what you want. You say they live far away, if you suggested  to him, that you came for a visit, what would his reaction be??/

I hope you can sort it out with your son.

Sadly, legally, you have no right to your grandchild, unless Welfare was going to take them away from the parents.

I feel for you, i really do.  It must be hard wanting to be a part of your grandchild's life and being treated with such disrespect from your son.  All I can say is, I hope he wakes upto himself and accepts you back into his life.

I'm really sorry to hear that.  I believe that a child should have as much access to their extended family as possible.  I also know how distressing it is for the family when one member shuts out the rest.  My brother's brother-in-law got married without telling his parents, and then had a baby, which they've met once.  The heartache they suffer is terrible, and for some reason he doesn't see what he is doing to them.  Perhaps he doesn't care.

I'm not a grandmother, and have never been in such a situation, so I'm definitely not an expert.  However, I say keep trying.  Don't allow them to walk over you, but try not to criticise or give advice, because it might be taken very badly (even if it's good advice, and even though you have some right to do it, being the grandmother).  Just tread carefully, perhaps send a gift or two, ask how they are going, offer to help.

Keep it as nice as you can, and if things start to get ugly, stop for a few days, then try again.

Have you told him that you have good intentions? That you want to get to know her and be an active grandparent and give them all the love and support they want or need? Just putting myself in your son's shoes if you have only spoken to her once then call to speak to her on the phone I might just think you're ringing to cause trouble or to get in the way. I might even think that you aren't interested in speaking to me and might even be calling to stir trouble. It also depends on what kind of relationship you have with your son, if it wasn't a great one to begin with then he might think you have negative intentions. Instead of speaking with her over the phone perhaps state your intentions and tell him you're okay with his choice in relationships and the pregnancy. He may be scared that you're going to cause trouble, that you're going to be judgemental about the pregnancy or the age of his girlfriend. Other than that, he may just be an extremely private person. For example, my brother has been going out with a girl for over a year now and refuses to bring her over to meet our family. Everytime we question him about when we get to meet her, he changes the subject.

Keep trying offer to go their for a visit staying else where so they cant say no and offer to look after the baby when born so they can go out or ask then what they need for the baby take it slow. Hope all works out let us know how you go?