All of you are displaying immature and silly behaviour Jerry Springer style... This guy is a creep for having an affair with a woman who has a partner; she is pretty disgraceful for cheating on someone over a 3year period and alcohol or not; getting involved in it yourself is just plain silly.  Really, you ought to forget about the whole thing and focus on the more positive aspects of your life and people with decent morals.

Thanks everyone. I knew i had no reason to feel bad, but i guess because everyone thinks this woman is so great when the few friends that know take her side its hard not to feel like ive done somehing wrong. Ive decided to start standing up for myself and next time the family ask ill just tell them. The lover knows she has a partner. The baby looks exactly like the partner so she felt there was no need to say she is having the affair. She says i stopped but i know they get together every now and then. She talks to me when we see each other to keep up appearances

Are you the bad guy? LOL HELL NO!! Stick up for yourself hun, to tell the truth if my best friend ever did that to me, I'd be sure to tell the whole family the real reason why we aren't friends. But then again I'm a bit of a bitch to people who cross the line with me lol

Just so I've got the picture, your best friend of 15 yrs has been in a relationship for 10yrs of which the last 3 yrs she's been having an affair? Is that correct?

If so you are not that bad guy! She has cheated in her relationship (lack of fidelity) and is taking her guilt out on you. If I were in your shoes, I'd be telling her partner to get tested for STD's. I also threaten that if she didn't fess up. I'd do it for her. She has no right or claim on him (the affair guy) as she is already in a committed relationship. I'd also ditch the friendship, you don't need friends like her who introduce you single guy's only to have her threaten you for taking an interest. Not to mention the pain she is causing her partner and the heartache when he finds out. What about the child? Is her partner the father or is her lover? The consequences are far reaching, does her partner want to raise the lovers child?

Otherwise I'd walk way from the friendship telling her I can't be friends with someone who lies and cheats in relationships. I have recently terminated a friendship, were she (my friend, lied and cheated in her marriage leaving hubby out of pocket for another woman) Infidelity kills relationships including friendships. I can't trust someone who is cheating and lying in their relationship.

I hope this helps but probably not as there is a child to consider.

Raven

Um hun, you are not the one with the problem here!  She is!  She is having an affair and thinking it is alright to do so and then turning around and making you out to be a bad friend?  Does this poor guy even know she's already in a relationship?  Is this affair still going on?

The way I see it, you don't need to surround yourself with a narcasistic hypocrite.  It doesn't matter you have been best friends for 15 years, you don't deserve to be treated like that!!!!  Your friend doesn't own anyone, especially not you, and if you lose more friends because of her, then they weren't really friends to begin with either!

Believe what I say, because I have been there and done that.  I woke up one day and told myself I wasn't going to put up with the mental, emotional and physical abuse of my 'friends' and it stopped then and there.  I lost all my friends, but I am happier now because I took control of my life and know what sort of people I consider to be friends.  They are the ones I have here who listen, treat me like I am valid and give me a kick in the pants when I need it.  I've only met one of them, but all of them make me feel like I have friends, true friends.

Don't regret your actions, because you did nothing wrong!  Ignore what they think, because....well, this is a parenting forum and I really don't think it is appropriate for me to finish that comment here! LOL

How are you the bad guy in all this? simple your not and she is no friend to you at all and he sounds like someone you should just stay away from aswell sounds like they deserve each other saves them making someone elsles life miserable. If your family asks and you feel comfortable telling them than do that I think they will see her in a different light. You are to good for these people get some you friends you deserve better.

 So you kissed a guy that she had an affair with and your the bad guy???? I think you mite need a new friend lol. I dont get how he could be "hers" since she is with someone else.... who she cheated on O.o i would just rather stay away from people like that lol.

Sounds like a daytime t.v drama lol