 |
|  |
|
 |
 |
 |
I need some advice....
This is the situation. Whenever, i hear a sad news of a child`s death or sickness, as old as my little one or even younger than mine, i feel so sad and can`t stop thinking as to what the Mom must be going thru. It does not matter even if i do not know that family. As long as i hear it in TV , newspaper or the internet. For eg : If a child has passed away due to some accident like- drowning , car accident or let`s say even kidnapped i just can`t let my mind set free. I just keep feeling sad , get emotional and hold my child tight and hug her to just know that she is safe in my arms. Some times even tears roll down my cheeks and i want to talk and make the Mom feel good by talking to her, but i know it is not possible, as i hear the international news and it has not happened in my town.
For eg : yesterday, while grocey shopping - i saw a toddler almost standing on the grocery cart to grab some stuff from the aisle and the grandma did not know and i was close to the cart holding my little one and i had to hold his hand and make him sit on the cart and ofcourse she thanked me for that as she was not paying attention. I was scared for his safety not that i was trying to show her that she is a neglient person. after that incident, as i went far from her, i was just telling my husband that i did not want the baby to fall on the floor of the grcy store, as they have no carpets and he could injure himself bad.
So, my question is : am i being too emotional or overprotecitive ?
I also can`t let go of my feelings of the family that are going thru this tragedy during the loss of their child. I always keep thinking about the Mom. In this situation, my husband is very understanding and keeps advising that there are lots of things going on in this world and it is not in my control, so i have to keep moving on and pay attention for the safety of our child in the meantime.
Plse help me to let go of my feelings and emotions while i hear some devastating news.
Thank you for your time.
| |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
Other answers to this question:
|
|
| |
|
|
Re: I need some advice....
It seems that you are one of a sensitive group of people that empathize with people in sad or potentially painful situations This is who you are and is nothing to be ashamed of.
There is one philosophy you can look upon for inspiration in almost any situation. Think of the 90/10 principle.
10% of your life is totally out of your control.
90% of your life is shaped by how you handle that first 10%
Basically, if there is a situation that you are totally unable to do anything about, try not to let it worry you. If there is something you can do, and effect a positive change go for it. From what you mentioned in your post, you don't like meddling and making people feel like they are hopeless, so you are already on the right track.
With regards to the people who are facing the tragic loss of a young loved one, by all means be a little sad, but you gotta keep in mind that there is nothing that you can do to to change or improve the situation. So you really have to try to not to allow the sadness affect you. This may sound weird, but maybe you should make an appointment with a grief counselor. A counselor will give you the support and tools to help you learn to cope with your feelings in a way that is good for you. I went to one once, for a slightly different reason, and mark my words....they a re well worth chatting to!
|
 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
Re: I need some advice....
Like DA says, its pretty normal to feel that way, though turning the sympathy and empathy meters as well as the 'heart in mouth' buttons down is a good idea.
Not every child has access to parents who do the right thing, or are kept safe from harm, so just be proud that you are doing the right thing.
When I see those same news reports, especially of child drownings, I actually get angry with the parents/carers of the child, because it was their responsibility to ensure it didn't happen, so I am slightly opposite to you, but I also see the bigger picture, which is what you should start doing too. It helps.
When you see these things and you hug your daughter, tell her that you feel very lucky to have her in your life and that you are so glad that she is safe from harm. Things do happen, and sometimes, they are unavoidable.
If you feel really strongly about this, why not start your own website where you can write what you would like to say to these families? It is pretty easy to do, and will make you feel as though you have reached out to them.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|  |
