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monyq83
monyq83 | October 2006

Sharing

Anyone got some tips on sharing? Ive tried everything!

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dolphins30
October 2006 | dolphins30
Sharing
I think if you teach your child from an early age to share, then it won't be so hard when they grow up. I find, if for eg. i'm eating toast, and have 2 slices, and my daughter would like one. I always say, i will share my food with you, and will give you a slice of my toast. If she has toys in her hand, and i ask her if mummy can have one, and i say can i share with you? and she'll sometimes say no, and then i tell her about the toast incident, and then she kinds of understands then.


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Marlena
3.25 (Average) | October 2006 | Marlena
Sharing
I think it is hard to get them to share.  Evey kid goes threw it and they grow out of it (hopefully).  Teh only thing I do is if there is a toy that they cant share I take it away and nop one plays with it.  I dont know how else to teach them to share.  My son has his days and toys.  Some days he is ok to share other days he isn't.  I kno whe wont share his trains so I might put them up before any baby company comes over just to avoid a fight. 


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momma
5.00 (Excellent) | October 2006 | momma
Sharing

What type of situation do you want your babe to share?  Is it at home with siblings or with friends who visit?  We've discovered that if friends are coming over, we begin by removing the toys that cause big problems of fighting etc...  plus we also ask my son before his friends come over if there are any "special" toys that he would like to put away for safe keeping.  We like to give him some ownership over the situation.  I agree that we often ask kids to do what we don't do ourselves.  We also just try to make it clear to everyone (the kids) that we will take turns to reassure them that they'll get their turn.  if a fight errupts over something we remove that toy all together.  I think that helps them realize that fighting over something doesn't work out in the end and that they need to find a better way to settle it.  If it's sharing with a sibling, we just have the rule that whoever has it at the moment is entitled to play with it as long as they like and only after they put it down then the other child can take their turn.  If my younger child is narrowing in on my older childs space we suggest that perhaps instead of getting into a flap about it, that my son help redirect her to a toy of her own that she may enjoy playing with.  I hope that maybe some of this helps, I'll be rechecking this question for more helpful answers myself. 



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elizabeth
4.00 (Good) | October 2006 | elizabeth
Sharing
I don't know how old your child is, but my son has just turned three and is only just beginning to understand the concept of sharing/playing together. He will offer people some of his food, toys etc. and has just started to ask me and his sister can share together, which usually means playing a game.Some child care professionals believe that children cannot fully grasp the concept until they are about five years old. I guess the only thing you can do to be consistent in your teaching and have patience.


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Tammy13
2.93 (Average) | October 2006 | Tammy13
Sharing - no, play together - yes

I came from Israel, and in hebrew we don't say "share" to kids. instead we incourage them to "play together". I continued that with my son, even though we're in Australia and everyone wants him to "share" - i kept using the "play together".

I'm basically against the "sharing" idea, because we teach them to "share" things, and we, as adults, give them the opposite example - when i come to your home, would you share your clothes with me, or your car, or your DVD player and so on? we adults don't "share" our "toys" with others. at the most we lend them or we let you have it for a while or we "play" together (watch DVD together).

I usually tell kids to play together and if they want to have something just for themselves - 5 minutes child A and then 5 minutes child B (of course 5 minutes or 10 minutes doesn't really matter).

Also, i'm not sure your child's age, but basically up until the age of 3 - children don't understand the meanind of "sharing" or "playing together" - so there's not much point of pushing them to do so. Instead try to have few alternatives when there are few kids around.

Hope that helped.



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Jessgore
5.00 (Excellent) | October 2006 | Jessgore
Sharing

With the kids at the small day care I work for, I play change....    I explain that this is a fun game what we do is one person plays with this toy and the other person plays with that toy.. When I yell change you swap toys...

This has worked wonders for the kids and some times I forget to yell change I find they do it themselves..  I don't think they have much concept of time as some times it could be seconds for them when they are yelling it out for themselves, but they are so happy to play change...  

I hope this helps...



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      monyq83
October 2006 | monyq83
Sharing

Jessgore, thankyou that was great advice, i will definately try that.

My home is made up of the two children i had from a previous relationship, and one child from my fiance's previous relationship, and the child that we had together as a result of this relationship.

The trouble that I am having is that when the kids go to their other parent's house for access on the weekends, if they buy them a new toy or get a toy in a happy meal or something, and they bring it home, they dont want to share this toy with anyone else because it is special to them because they dont get to see that parent as much. Ive tried asking the parent to keep the toys at their place but they tell me im being stupid and stop being so fussy and that its unfair to the child in question if they arent allowed to play with their new toy. but in the end it all causes too much trouble and its not worth it!



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wildrose
4.00 (Good) | October 2006 | wildrose
Sharing
There are some advices in Minti:
Teaching children to share, using timer
To share or not to share, use the word 'take turn' instead of 'share'
Playdate peace


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