I use to be a babysitter and, let me tell you, your friend has it pretty good! I think your friend is taking advantage of you and maybe you should just tell her you are unable to take care of her children because you need to spend more time with own child. In reality her husband should really be stepping up to the plate and the care of the children should be his responsibility as well as hers. You should not have to pick up their slack because you are at home with your child. It's the job of a professional to look after the children not yours and until you say "no" she'll keep ringing.

JUST SAY NO! 

Hi

Yep you gave been shoved in a corner and are being used, your money to feed her children, your money to pick the kids up from school, your money to buy Christmas presents for both her kids, gee you have been subjected to an extrodinary situation called "push me over I don't mind".

Why this sounds hard is because it is. It's a very hard call for you to make as you have probably felt like "I do you a favour" and now it has a real sting to it by you are not as appriciated as you really ought to be.

At least you have recognised that you can no longer go on like this, that is a great start, now what to do about it? mmmm

Ok ask yourself what type of person is she can I just outright tell her that she is using me?

when was the last time she actually sat down and spoke to you as a friend not just picked up the likds and went away?

Ask her to come in for a bit of a chat make her watch her own children at your place make small coments like: Oh they do this or have done that at scvhool today an they have done homework blah blah.  Make it really sound like she is missing out on her childrens education and sports and stuff.

This will make her think if she has any interest at all in her own kids that is.....  Then openly make a comment on you and your life

something along the lines of of I was asked the other day to work at a day care centre and I would be getting Blah blah a day, afternoon  make some enquiries about the cost of the nearest centre plus pick up and delivery of the kids to and from the centre.  This is of course if there is one near you. If there isn't find another closely related babysitting facility and find out the cost, you really need to do this as you then know yourself what you could descide upon when it comes to you and your asking price. You are doing a paid job for free!!! Don't forget this.

These conversations might take the whole week or even a couple of weeks to tell her but at the end of it then oyu can say well you have told her, if however she is a person that doesn't take the hint then stop for a while, that's right say you got plans and you can't do it today then do it for a day or two the don't you have your own family and needs to consider now and you are making it hard for her yes lessons are difficult to teach when people don't get it, but they are worth it.

You can upset her but when she tells if she tells other people what she has done to you and your family then she will be hopefully told by her other friends and family that you are to good to her and her family. Stand up and stop being treated so poorly you and your family deserve a lot better in friends and in friendships.

You might have a better friend after this or you might not but at least you can consentrate on your own family and not have to be a mum to two families.

Oppps sorry it's so long hope this helps, all the best of luck let us know what happens.  :)

Have a great day!!

You don't raelly need an excuse not to watch your friend's children for free.  It would be different if she was watching your children as well and you had a mutual arrangement going.  What is actually happening though is you are being used.  This is not a friendship you want to protect in its current terms.  The only choice you really have is to raise the issue with your friend and either offer to baby sit her children for a fee or offer a mutual arrangment or tell her to make her own arrangements.  Why should your attention be diverted from your own children? A person can only use you like that if you allow them to and you don't want your children to grow up getting the mesasge that Mum is a "walk over."  I know that friendships are precious but, with respect, this one doesn' t seem to be too precious to your friend.  If it was, she would treat you with more respect and would be a lot more giving to you.  In law, we call it "quid pro quo".  I do something for you - you do something for me!!!!

Wow, I am sorry for this.. You feel like you're being used.. I"m sorry to say but you are. There is no excuse for her husband to say that he can't control her kids. I would just tell her straight out, that you need to be getting paid for taking care of her kids, either the same amount she was paying the babysitter or more. Or just tell her that you will not look after her kids no more and its her responsibilty to find someone else to take care of them. Its rude yes, but in the situation you are in, I would try that if I was you.

I would be upset as well if you spent sooo much money on her boys and she spends 3 dollars on yours..
I don't think there will be any suggestions for you that will not wreck your friendship with her. She might take it the wrong way, but later down the road she will hopefully realize and appolgize. Good luck is all I can say right now, aside from what I wrote. I hope all goes well.