hello,  l am proably repeat myself by saying the best thing you can do is support her in every way you can. You both do need to sit down and have a long talk about this as it is a life changing event. Pease dont choose what she is going to do as it could bring more unhappyiness on you both.

l was a teenage mother who had her first son after my 17th birthday and if it was not from the support  from my family , who knows what l would be like today. It brought my mother and l closer together and we did everything together through my pregnancy / birth and helping me raise my son (with my partner). l know have 4 sons and l know l and my family made the right choice in life.

PLEASE LET US KNOW WHAT HAPPENS AS WE ARE ALL THERE FOR U BOTH

HI IT MUST BE A HARD TIME FOR YOU ALL BUT THE BEST THING AT THIS TIME IS FOR YOU BOTH TO SIT DOWN AND TALK ABOUT IT AND BE THERE FOR EACH OTHER.

THE WORST THING TO DO IS MAKE HER DO SOMETHING SHE DOES NOT WANT TO DO. AS THE RESULTS IN THAT COULD DRIVE A KNIFE BETWEEN YOU. BEST LUCK TO YOU BOTH.

The best thing I can say is this.

Remember that what is best for you, and what would have been best for you at her age, is not necessarily what will be best for your daughter.  She is her own person and ultimately is the one that has to make the decision.

The worst thing you can do is make her do anything.  That will only breed regrets, bitterness, blame, and resentment.  Unless you want your daughter to spend the rest of her life fighting off depression, support her and go along with whatever she decides, but make sure she is made fully aware of all the consequences and responsibilities associated with every decision she has available before she makes her decision.

Hi there,
Seems like you already have a lot of responses so ill just chuck these bits in and if I repeat im sorry.

1. You should let her decide what she wants. Make sure she knows all the pro's and cons
2. I am against abortion when there are so many other families out there longing for a baby BUT let her decide.
3. How can she know that she is 2 weeks pregnant. You cant take a test less that 3 weeks. Are you sure its not just a ploy?

Hi there,

I was 14 when I met my now husband and I ended up pregnant at this age.  My first thought was what do I do?  In the end I decided to get an abortion, my focus was school and education at this time.  I don't regret doing this and I have to admit that I was quite mature from practically raising myself due to having parents that were never there.  I feel for your daughter and feel that this has to be her decision and not to push her into a decision, in the end she will have to live with whatever she decides to do.  I also ended up being pregnant again at 15 and this one I kept, she was born 6 months after my 16th birthday, the whole way through this journey as a teenage mum I had no end of support from family and friends.  Just support her no matter what she decides, this will be a really scary time of decision for her.  Also shame on the minti members that basically slapped this person over a profile that they can't understand, this could be the mother and it could be the daughter, either way they asked for your help and you quite likely made this person feel really bad and clouded the advice they required.  This kind of behaviour is why I am considering cancelling my membership.  i don't want to be associated with a place where everyone seems to be so judgemental!

I wish you and your daughter a lot of luck and bonding through this time. I have read through what others have written and I agree with them that it must be her decision, because it is something that she will have to live with for the rest of her life. 

In order to make the right decision for her she needs the love and support of you and her family, but counselling will not go amiss either.  It will certainly help with dealing with whatever choice is made and the aftermath of that decision.  

I see that there are three choices, keep the baby herself, adoption or abortion.  All have far reaching consequences and need to be explored thoroughly.  At two weeks she is still very early on in the pregnancy so maybe getting her to a clinic to see a doctor would be a great first step and then you can have professional opinion about what next step to take also.

Good luck
Peace
EF.x 

I do agree that the profile thing does sound a bit suss, but yes, she is only new and come on now, we all make mistakes.

A few things that do come to mind though are these:

• How in god's name does she know shes only 2 wks pregnant? Is she 2wks late? If so thats completely normal for a 15yr old girl as her body is still adjusting, and stress can cause you to be late too. It's rare for that to show up on a pregnancy test so early, in which case I'm guessing it showed up on a blood test. But even then, the doctor would most likely say its a possible pregnancy, not a definate one, and tell the daughter to come back in another week's time when the the level of pregnancy hormone in the body is higher.
• Also, where did princess100 go? You dont just put a post up that seems to be so urgent to her, and then just disappear and not check/reply to other members' comments.

Just a thought.

I think making your daughter have an abortion would not help matters in my younger days friends of mine became pregnant at young ages a few had abortions and got pregnant again.There is lots of time to prepare her for a descision of adoption take her to meet girls her age with babies to give her some perspective on the realities of what being a parent really is being so young your life does not end school can be finished the possibities are still good for her to be succesfull with lots of support and guidence.I am not a therapist i've just seen alot.

You know guys, there is such an easy way to resolve situations such as this. If you are unsure about a post, email someone about it....minti admin would be the best bet, Matthew, Clay, Rachel...that's what these guys are here for....

But despite the profile, there is a question here that is valid, a good one and one that a lot of teens face. So there is no real halm in this being posted in the 'right place'....and ya know, maybe someones daughter began an account for their mother....and now it's mum who is using it....

Just me and my thoughts having a step outside the square...

Cheers Lavinia

Honey don't worry about what everyone else is saying. Who says you have to give all your details correctly anyway.

If this person is 15 and pregnant make sure SHE decides by herself cause she is the one who is going to look after it for the next 18 years. Tell her to follow her heart. Good luck.

Get a grip everybody - regardless of the profile, this is a relevant question, and there is no need to give it less than a relevent response!  The profile age could have been filled out incorrectly, the person could have signed in with false information just to get some help... There are a ton of less than malicious reasons that the profile doesn't add up to the question...

Just give the advice, or give it a miss if you don't like it.  My small piece of advice is for you to stop wondering about what you should MAKE her do, and sit down and ask her what she would like to do.  You both need to seek professional advice about what options are available to you, what the consequences of those options would be and make an educated decision based on that information.  As her mother, it is your role to provide support for her and be there to assist and guide her no matter what decision she makes. 

All I can suggets is that you support her no matter what she decides to do. She may make the choice to have a termination and she will need all the support of her family to do that. If she chooses to keep the child then she will also need your support.

She will ask for advice and you need to not push your own ideas onto her and give her an idea of what parenthood is like by going over your own experiences. You can not actually make her have a termination, so the reality is that you will have to go along with HER choice.

Please support her, treat her choices with respect and love her like you always have.

I would say this. Talk to her and see how she feels about it tell her what having a child means all the ups and downs, good and bad. get some profesional help as well and then she can make a decision. be suportive one way or the other if you can but tell her from the start if you are going to be there for her.

I don't know what is going on with your profile hhmm but I sense someone needs help??? WHO ever or if the age is 14-15,pregnancy at this age requires a lot of emotional and monetry support.A baby is a life time commitment they are very demanding and a support net work is needed if the bub is to be kept.I personally don't agree with abortions if the baby  and Mum is healthy.Adoption is a very real answer to the problem,if the Mum is OK with this I think altimately it is the Mum's choice(of baby)I think it is not an ideal life path for a 15 year old but I think they need all the love and support we can give.I do think counseling should be offered to the mother of the baby so she can make a very important clear decision. Good luck sweety

I am going through the same thing except it's my sister.  She just turned 15 also.

I know how hard it is. I guess I haven't been the most supportive of the whole situation, but she doesn't live with me. I would tell her her options and support her in what ever decision she  makes. She needs you more than ever right now!

I am going through a similar situation to this now...

Although its my son & his girlfriend.I was of course upset to start with but I have supported them from day one.My sons g/f's mum tried to force her to have an abortion & was told that the decision to abort or not lays with the pregnant person not the parents.I dont support abortion but sometimes it cant be avoided, but I think there are other solutions.

I believe you need to ask your daughter what SHE wants & go from there.You should support her choice whichever way she decides to go.

Doubt that Ive been much help but I hope things work out for you.

Hi there,

My sister was 15 when she fell pregnant with her now 16 yr old daughter. It was very hard for her as our family withdrew any support as they did not agree.

BUT I am very proud of my sister as she has done a marvellous job and my neice is a very well and grounded young lady who understands more about life and responsibilty than most 16 yr old's.

I myself also have a 15 yr -old daughter who as a result of being raped fell pregnant. All i wanted to do was to abort especailly gicen the circumstances. BUT what i did do was to take my daughter along to meet some other young mums and also my sister talked to her. (my daughter does not bleieve in abortion and loved the baby growing inside her as it was an innocent victim of a crime)!

In the end my daughter made the hardest decision of her life and that was to terminate. I offered her all the support that i could and I still do. WE are much closer because of it. Don't get me wrong there are still issues BUT because i HELPED not demanded she respected me more.

Give you daughter respect and let her see the reality of the situation. Be supportive because at the end of the day the decision is hers to make and regardless of what she does she is your daughter and you as her mum will always love her regardless.

Goodluck.

Yes I'm on the thinking that your not really an honest type of person...you have very misleading and condradicting info for example

Well, I have 2 brothers 2 daughters with a baby on the way I have a great grandmother great grandfather a grandmother a grandfather 4 uncles 6 aunts 2 great uncles 4 great aunts and my boy friend.

Children    

1. Elizabeth Jane
2. Jane Eyre
, female, 16 years old , female, 13 years old

 and you're how old...

14 years old

mmmmmm yeah I belive you

My sister fell pregnant when she was 15 . She had the pregnancy terminated becuase it was the right thing for her to do at the time. She now has 2 very healthy beautiful children at 27. The most important thing is to not FORCE your daughter to do anything. You are her mother ,  and want only whats best for your daughter, we all know that, but forcing her to give her baby up for adoption or terminate the pregnancy could very well tear you and her apart. Instead, offer her support, give her the resources to educate herself on what it means to be a mother, get her , and yourself some counselling.She's only 2 weeks pregnant, she still has time to make an EDUCATED decision. Show her her options, and let HER make the decision, and as hard as it might be for you to accept the decision she might make.. SUPPORT her.. she will need you more now than at any other time in her life.