HI

My husband and I have 4 children and you don't need alot of money to have happy and healthy kids.

My kids don't have the flash birthday party with 20+ kids every year, or expensive holidays, but they do love doing whatever you do, and if that means a trip to the park down the road instead of the amusement park or a drive to the beach for the day instead of a Gold Coast holiday, then they will be happy to just spend time with you, and besides, I think they grow up appreciating the special treats more this way than if you were to lavish them with everything they could possibly want.

So don't worry about financing a baby, I am sure you will get by knowing that all that counts is that your kids are happy.

Take the amount of love you feel you have to give and divide it by the amount you feel you need to give to each kid.

I think it depends on your priorities. We are not very materialistic, so for us the decision to have more children is based on the child, not finances. Within reason, you can always find a way to live within your means.

Your questions have echoed what goes on in my mind from time to time as I plan to have a second child. You know in your heart you want a child, you know in your mind that it will be harder to budget, but  go with what feels right to you. Money is important, yes, but it's not everything. We all learn to live within our means. I know when I was on maternity leave (unpaid), and we struggled, but we got by. Now as we plan our second baby, we know things will be even tighter (as we entered into a mortgage since we had our son), and we know it'll be hard yakka to get by. But at the end of the day, you project yourself to a time maybe 30 years from now and work out what you have to what you haven't. ie. in years to come, you might have the nice house the nice car, but would you feel empty inside still (and have an empty house? If you think that something would still be missing in your life, then you have your answer - have your child. Family is more important than money. My mum and dad had 5 children and always no money, we may have had more than our fair share of baked beans on toast, but mum and dad have the pleasure of 5 grown up children and 13 grandchildren and one great grandchild. Let's see money buy that! All the best with whatever you decide.

I believe that your children choose you.  I'm not sure how to reconcile this view with the fact that I don't believe in God but I really do think they choose us.   Which is great!  You really don't have to put that much thought into it after all.

Some one bellow wrote  "If the decision to have a child was based on money no one would ever have any."   This is so true...

It was not until my mother said if you sit around waiting for the bank account to grow before you have kids you'll be waiting for ever... There is always something that will pop up...

My parents married young.. They did not decided to have children, lets just say that it was an accident that turned out great.. LOL yep me the accident, they have now been married almost 33 years.  They struggled a lot in the first couple of years only because they did not know how to manage their money properly... But over time things just came naturally.

With us we tried for 4 years before Francis came along. What made us chose to have a child while living in a small two bedroom apartment, having less money then we do now?  Watching my step daughter playing on the floor, my husband turned to me and said.  "I think it is time for another one!" 

When Francis came along I worried would we have enough for this, or that... But in the end well you seem to manage. No matter what there is always something that is going to be wanting to take your money.  And for us, no matter what we managed and it became a second nature and I was not so worried about money any more.. Oh I still worry about it as I have been known to be a bit cheap (at least thats what the hubby says, in a nice way), but we manage.

I think it should be based on the joy of having children. But that is just me. 

I think if the decision to have children was based on money no-one would ever have any. Its funny - I always thought after I had my daughter 8 years ago that I would never be able to afford another one and yet here I am on my third coming up in June. The money always seems to stretch to accomodate whatever needs my children have - We dont by any means over-indulge them but they dont really lack for anything either. We just seem to work it into the budget and we always find the money. I think if in your heart you want another child base your decision on what you have to offer emotionally rather than financially. If you are emotionally ready for another child then go for it! Im not really a believer in waiting until the 'right time' to have a child. There never really is a right time - when it happens it is the right time for you.

Hi there -

I have three kids and more me cost wasn't really an issue. I guess when it come down to it the decision is a personal one. It must be answered on many levels. Some being cost, time, love, support, room the list can be endless.

The reason I didn't think cost was an issue is because already having two kids I knew the short cuts, I buy in bulk when i can and lets face it once they are out the the baby faze feeding one extra doesn't make that much differance.

As for toys etc - don't buy them, join a lending or swapping library. These are great as you can take toys that are still in very good nick and either swap them for others or you can donate them to the lending library and lend some different toys yourself.  Takes away the cost of buying new toys everytime our kids get bored. These places are scattered throughout Australia everywhere. Family Day Care etc should be able to help you find one. It's costs a small donation to join and then your off and running.

I also began a clothes swapping scheme locally where us mums all get together every 3 months with our clothes that our kids have grown out of and swap them with others similair. I put up poster locally and it was a huge success . . saving me and others a fortune on clothes.

So in the end I think it's your personal choice - and if you have love to give then I say why not GO FOR IT! . . . . . .

Oh dear ,you got me started so i hope you can listen.Im a mother of four kids one on the way due july.I had my four children out of wedlock,on the pension and in the middle of a bad relationship. I have well mannered,healthy ,well rounded kids so i know that money didnt facter in at all.we raised them just as good as any working couple.They may not have attended heaps of art classes,sports and stuff but they did ok.I really believe that when you can say i would love another child without a but following you are ready.Love and nuturing raises a baby not cash,dont get me wrong money is a good help but what im saying is that is not the main and only facter.I would have no children if i waited to have enough money or waited till i was a better age or had a five bedroom house,your heart will make the decision.

I would say it should be based on desire first and finances second because really there are ways to work a budget around a kid. But if you wait to have the finances in order to have kids... well then there would never be any.

If your in dire straights then it probably wouldn't be a good move, but just because you don't have a lot of money that's not a good reason, in my opinion, to not have a child.