Hi

Problem with placing kids into foster care placements, is that they are placed with similar children with similar problems. And as you say her friends around town are fueling the fire. Dad could place daughter in respite care, which is a carers home that can have no other children there. Dad could have access visits with this placement at the respite home or at a mutual location and slowly build up a relationship. Lots have kids have done great on solo placement. I think though that Dad moving away from you and your kids wouldnt be wise as then your own children would feel traumatised by their father leaving. I would recommend (if there was no where else) to look into placement with a respite carer who dad can then spend time with her one on one. That way he comes home to you and your children and also sees daughter. Its worth thinking about - contact your local Department of Human Services for advice. I know personally of an EXACT situation, your perspective included where dad built up a relationship with his child this way. He would spend 1 day a week with daughter and then the daughter had six days a week with carer. It then went to 2 days a week and 5 with carer and so on and so on. Eventually Dad was spending 6 days a week with family and one with carer. Then the daughter trialled living with dad with the support of the respite ie. daughter could go back to respite if she felt the need so she didnt feel boxed in. Happy to say daughter no longer needs respite. Im here to talk privately if you wish to discuss your feelings towards your step daughter.!