i had my first son at 33, it was planned and everything went ok, even though he nearly killed me!  i gave birth to my daughter at 39, i am now 42 and i WILL say one thing... its very exhausting at this age than it was with my son.  we are probably set in our ways later in life and it is a bit of getting used to the sleep dep! my son, Jack,  also feels left out sometimes because all my time is spent with Breeanna-Jo but we have explained to him many times how she cant do anything for herself properly yet, but i know he feels cheated as he was our baby for so long until his sister showed up!  good luck on whatever you decide   xx

this just what i've been told by my doctor

your firtility starts dropping from age 27 then after the age 30 your risks of down sydrome and all other pregnancy related problems get hirer and hirer, the best age to have children i was told is in your 20's for MANY reasons

The decision is of course yours and yours alone.  The question I have for you is are you willing to risk the possibility of not being able to conceive another child if you choose to wait?  Not every women is able to conceive a child in their late 30s early 40s, even though so many people seem to think they will and find out the hard way.  Why do you want to wait?  My opinion is, don't wait.  A baby is such a precious gift, a little miracle! I would hate it if you did wait and things didn't work out, like others have said, life doesn't always go to plan.

My opinion is that its a pesonal choice when and how many kids people have, however I have seen it many times when people live it for too long and than have problems. A friend had a child when she was 22 and decided that she would have another one when the first one started high school. Just before the child turned 11 she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and everything was removed now she is sorry that she didi that. my anty had my cousin and wanted to pay off the house before she had another child, they payed the house off in less than 6 years but she had to wait another 10 to have another child as there were some health problems and both her and unkle had to have operations and all that in order to have another child so there is 16 years gap.

Things dont always turn uot the way we plan.

don't you want to be able to grow with your children? how are you going to grow with them if he/she is 20 and you are 60 or even older. i had my first child at 17  and then my 2nd 1 at 19 and then my 3rd at 23 and i am only 25 at the moment and i am enjoying my kids to the fullest. i can relate to them really well and by the time i am done raising my children my husband and i are still young enough to have our life back.  but each to there own you have to make the right decision in yourself and i am sure it will be the right one.

 

Peronsally I like it that I was able to have my daughter at such a young age, and I hope to have another soon..

But I think it's all up to you. If you want to wait, then I would do it. Now if you want to one that is close in age with your daughter then do it too.. I guess it's a 50/50 decision.
I have to agree with Mony also, when you're older there are also the good advantage's. You will more than likely own your own home(or maybe you do at a younger age who knows?) and be able to provide for them more finically.

In the end, it all comes up to you and what you think is right for you and your family.

Good luck in your decision :)

Personally Im a fan of having kids young. Purely for the fact that you have more energy to chase them around and clean up after them than you do when youre older. Having said that though, having kids later on in life has its advantages also, eg youre more likely to own your own home and be able to provide for them better financially as youve had more time to save up. Either way I wish you all the best in whatever you decide.

no i don't think to late in life to a baby at that age . Though ther be a gap in ages , it be like strating all over again .i had a gap in mind kids of 11 years and found it was hard at frist to  adjust again for the frist six months , but every one driffrent .The best of luck to you in whatever  you decide.

As we women age, our ovas also age, and the older we are, the more the risk of the ova being imperfect, thus increasing the chances of miscarriage and birth defects/disabilities, etc.  But, the chances are still pretty slim. Generally speaking those problems hardly even exist until at least the age of 35, and only increase slightly with each year.  If you look after yourself, don't smoke, take drugs, or drink to excess, and have no major illnesses, having children at the age of 40 shouldn't be much of a problem at all, physically.

My mother had me when she was 36 and she had my brother at 42. Physically we both turned out fine. The problems that she faced were much the same as for a 25 year old.  Any extra maturity aside, she still had no prior experience with raising children and made all the same mistakes and had all the same troubles that other parents have - and as every child is different, because she had two children, she had to face all those problems twice.

One thing she always claimed to regret was not having us kids sooner, as her health wasn't the best later in life. She passed away at the age of 65 - her eldest grandson was only a year old and doesn't remember her at all.  Even as I was growing up as a kid, she couldn't join in and have the same fun and games with my brother and I that she would have had if she'd been younger.  So, she did have some regrets. But, that was her, there's nothing to say that it won't work out better for you. On the flip side, my aunt had 11 children and even at the age of 70 was more youthful and energetic than most 40 year olds I know! So there's no hard and fast rule, except if you want wonderful things later in life you have to look after yourself well enough to be fit enough to enjoy them when you get there.

But be assured, no matter what your age, being a parent will be a challenge every step of the way, with every child you have.  Take heart in the fact that the challenges are very rewarding, and do what you feel is right for you and your family. Good luck with it whatever you decide to do.

 

Hi Bilkies,

As you know I have 3 kids . ..  the age gap betwwen my eldest and my youngest is 15yrs!

I have a 7-8 gap between all my kids . . . . My answer would be to try and have your kids closer toether . . .  I wish I had been able to do this! As it is now none of my girls are at an age where they can share their private thoughts or just be mates . . . They don't understand anything that each other is going through . . .My eldest 16 and my middle 7 aren't close because they share nothing. . . . Then there is my 10month old who will also share no tight bonds growing up.

In reality WHAT 16yr girl wants a 7 yr old kid sister hanging around or wants to  spend time with a baby that cries all the time. FOR ME personally it's been like being a first time parent each time. I thought it would be easier this time but it wasn't . . you for forget how much is involved in taking care of babies and then your other older children feel a bit neglected because they are so used to you being there for them.

I really wish my children were closer together. They'd have shared a stronger bond and would have understood each other better....  Hindsight is a wonderful thing BUT as it stands now I love all my children equally and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them . ..  . .

Cheers Kellz

There is a group here in Minti called " late in life moms " maybe its worth a look.

www.minti.com/groups/22/Late-in-Life-Moms/

Best Wishes Blond.

to be honest everyones differnt ..it depends on work etc,, also keep in mind your health . i had twins at 23 that was hard ,, ive now got a two year old and i find it very very easy . for me it worked out very well im way more patient and settled ,, i dont know if its cause i had twins and like i said it wasnt easy . the age gap also dosent bother me and my twins as they are loving big brothers  they spoil him and they cant wait to take him when he gets older to his first day of school

also after you hit 35 here you have to have a few tests to make sure your baby isnt downsindrome etc,, that usually happends in the first few months of being pregnent