As for your question, don't put the carriage in front of the horse...if you are "planning" to marry your partner, do that first.  Have some fun, establish your marriage before you add a third, "very dependent" person into the mix.  A baby adds A LOT of extra pressure to the marriage.  That's what I would do..

As for your money concerns: In the U.S. we have no "entitlements" unless you consider our end of year tax credit an entitlement but it is not really a monthly payment of the sorts. The way I see it is you should not  "count" on your entitlements to help you be a stay-at-home mom. For the 1st year of my oldest's life, she went to daycare and I cried every day. We sat down to make our plan for me to be a stay-at-home mom: 75% of my salary was going to daycare while we had an extra 25%. With that extra 25%, we paid off a big bill which was our car.  So that when I quit working, my salary would not be there but neither would our daycare or car loan expenses. Furthermore, neither were lunch expenses, nor as much gas during the month.  In your case since you are considering 1/2 time, you could "pretend" to get that smaller salary and pay off things with it.

How do you not afford them?  I was told I could never have kids, so when I became pregnant 2 years later I was so happy!  To go from thinking I would never have a child of my own to suddenly having one was worth everything I own!  Back then my husband was going to school and working for my dad, no steady pay. I was babysitting my sisters off and on, again not steady pay.  We decided he would get a "real" job, and I would stay home with the baby.  In the begining we gave up tons of stuff because we could not afford it, when our friends were going skiing, and to the lake, Jim was going to work.  I would not change a thing.  That was almost 10 years ago, now we own our home, our cars are paid off, and I still am a stay home mom, of 3.  The money seems to work itself out when you have children.  Good luck! 

I am probably gonna sound really stupid and inquisitive and judgementsl (although i am not) but it just sounds like to me you are saying....oh if we can't get this from the government then we won't have a child....we can't afford to do it because of our mortgage and blah blah blah, and blah blah blah.... and our income is this we are not rich enough for children blah blah blah.
Please take a step down and back for a minute and look at my life.
I am a single 19 y o mum, I get approx  AU$13,442 per yr, $517p/bi week. With that i also have to pay off a small mortgage i have (approx $30000) I have home and contents insurance, private health, life insurance and all the regular bills to pay PLUS rates which are about $450 when i get them.... now i haven't told you about the family tax benefit part a &b i get....thats an extra 260 a fortnight (bi week) that gets banked to collect interest so that if at the end of the month i have problems with any bills (never usually do) i can use the interest....it's also at times been used to pay off lump sums (tax benefit) of my mortgage!
Anyway my point is...there are people in this world...being single mums even coupled parents who have a life much harder than yours, yet don't feel the need to take money into consideration. Because when it all gets back to it....family is about love and happiness....and money can't buy you those things!

Scary News!!!!
Most of us never could afford children if we sat and did the math

On a serious note I think its great that you are taking bringing a child into the world so seriously and making sure you can offer the child everything you want to
Good on You All the Best
xxx

I have a baby and as an income we get 37K a year plus i work 8 hour a week and get a further 2k a year. Everyone is entitled to child benefit which at the moment is about £17.49 and is paid every four weeks so it works out at about 69 pound. This is due to be raised to £20 a week by 2010 following the new budget. You can claim working tax credit and child tax credits and this is all subject to your income. I get £40.50 every four weeks as my income is in the top banding I am not entited to working tax credit however you may be. In the first year the baby is born the amount is greater. If you check out netmums.com it will state a list of the amount next to your combined salary this should give you a better idea. If you choose to work you can get help with the cost of child care as well.

Costs I would say a week ( most expensive):

disposable nappies: £5/6,

Formula: £7

Wipes: £2- 4

However many people breast feed, you can use real nappies and you could use cotton wool and warm water rather than wipes saving those costs its all depends on what you choose.

hope this is of some help x

 

I don't know how much the cost of living is the United Kingdom,  but why do either of you or your husband have stay home? If money is really tight, you may not make ends meet with only one income. I think a lot of people do very well with both working parents.  What about maternity leave there? I heard you get a year? IF that's the case, I think that's plenty of time for you to feel at ease if you have to leave your baby to a day care at a year old.

If one parent must be a stay at home parent, I think it's important to consider who, between you and your husband has a bigger chance of climbing up in the work force and therefore earning more money in the future. If you're already established in your work industry, and your husband is just beginning, it seems that it wouldn't make sense for you to stay home and give up your place int he work force.

Also, who has a better health insurance? Again, I don't know how health insurance works in the UK, but if this will make a difference at all, you may want to consider it.

Good luck to you!

go have a chat to your social security and see what the can do for you... don't know about there but here in oz everyone gets a lil bit if they give up some work to look after kiddies. btw... you have no way of knowing what your children will need medically or otherwise so in short to answer your question... no one can afford them! lol but at least they make life a lil more interesting :)'s for you hope it all works out ok