Why do perfect strangers think that they have a right to touch my daughters face.
My daughter is 4 months old and I was wearing her in a baby bjorn front carrier. This morning I went to the bakery and one of the other customers - a lady I don't know, commented on how beautiful my daughter was and reached out and stroked her face near her mouth.
I am not paranoid about germs but that is a good way to spread colds and flu viruses. Not to mention an invasion of both mine and my daughters personal space.
I live in a small town (about 10000 people) so I don't want to be to nasty in case I meet her down the track as someones auntie or friend of something. How do other people handle this. Is there a tactful way of dealing with it?
She did it before I had time to move away so I couldn't prevent it but should I have said something?
i allow sometimes for elderly ladies to touch my daughters hand UNLESS they are holding a hanky.... and this is why i allow it....
In january i went to qld to visit my very sick great gran at the nursing home in which she lives, she shares her large room with another elderly lady....and this lady is blind!
She new emily was there but was unsure as to where, so i took my daughter to the lady and took the lady's hand and put it on emily's hand, and then on emily's cheek..... saying where i was putting her hand etc etc!
Elderly ladies cannot help but be drawn so close to young children and babies, because they are so adorable and i always think "what if they have no family" ....
And as for the children one, well i have never had that problem.... so i can't say!
So each time you go to back away from an elderly couple who wish to just gently touch your baby's face, please just think of what they may or may not have! IT truly is a hard thing not having any family!
I hate it i remember when joe was first born i had him the baby carrier and a woman came up to me and started saying he was so small etc and then started to stoke all his legs almost grabbing saying she wished she could have children but her husband wouldnt let her that was quite worrying i am sure she meant well but these days you just dont know. Old people generally go for the face i hate it though when they prod him.
well maybe this lady was just a little upset..... just think of how you would feel if you were in here situation..... and no i am not saying that "grabbing" at your son was right..... but a gentle stroke of the foot is fine!
Hi
We have no choice but to stop strangers touching Jalan.
It can be a life or death situation with her.
I just tell them straight because of health issues i would prefer them not to touch my child
One old lady insisted on touching her and when i had a go at her she goes how rude and i turned on her and said how would you feel if someone was trying to touch you and poke you...
She was offended and said i wasn't trying to hurt her and i replied but inadvertantly you are she has Cystic Fibrosis and your touch can kill her with a germ of your hands.
I have gotten to where any one tries to touch her i just say please don't touch her.
I no longer care if they get offended or not
If I meet them further down the track and they winge then I will tell them why i wouldn't allow the touch
If we touch someone we can be charged with assault or sexual harrasment why don't our children have the same right.
After all women can be paedophiles and child molesters too.
Just my thoughts
Luv Deb
I was a bit like Merle and make a joke out of it such as say uh uh get your grubby germ hands away from my bub and laugh, most people used to say oh sorry of course didn't think, and Im sure some were offended but for the health of my child I didn't really care. The other one I used which always stopped them and got a laugh was be careful he/she bites and then back away they never went in for another touch. Babies are irresistible and most people just don't think....
it's hard, but it's much harder when it's a small child touching your baby's face. You don't know how clean a little 4 or 5 year old is, or if their mother washed their hands after playing outside, and even if they had been picking their noses before trying to let the baby suck their finger! I have always pulled my daughter away from babies we don't know and if we do know then I tell her to hold the baby's hand or stroke the babies arm and she knows now to do that. As for adults, well they should know better! I come from a small town too so I know what it's like to have that happen. I think the best way is to just have her positioned so that she is against you, and maybe even if the baby carrier is positioned to cover part of the baby's face if that is possible. I know the one I had for Hannah, her head was right down in the carrier. She was only 4 months old when I stopped using it and was still small enough to be facing me, she would lean back in the carrier that would hold her in place and also not allow others to touch, if any of that makes sense.
Before today I felt she was safer from this kind of thing in the carrier than the stroller because they are also invading my personal space.
Today Natalya was actually facing me (not front facing as she often is these days) but with her head turned sideways. This lady was standing to the side of me so I didn't see it coming until it had happened. I didn't know what to say.
I think it is sooo hard when they are older ladies(grannies)I think I probably offended a lot of people but I was absolutely adamant she would not be touched on the face.I used to just hold their hand thus taking it away from B and nod and say yes she is beautiful isn't she,oh well must dash....blah blah blah.I wasnt rude but let them know I wasnt standing for it by my actions and swiftness in wanting to escape.With younger ones I used to just make a joke and say arrrhhhh(in a funny way)get those grubby mitts away from my Bubby ,you've got germs all over them(smiling all the while)through gritted teeth PMSL.Most times it worked and we were in the public on a daily basis.regards Merle
it's hard, but it's much harder when it's a small child touching your baby's face. You don't know how clean a little 4 or 5 year old is, or if their mother washed their hands after playing outside, and even if they had been picking their noses before trying to let the baby suck their finger! I have always pulled my daughter away from babies we don't know and if we do know then I tell her to hold the baby's hand or stroke the babies arm and she knows now to do that. As for adults, well they should know better! I come from a small town too so I know what it's like to have that happen. I think the best way is to just have her positioned so that she is against you, and maybe even if the baby carrier is positioned to cover part of the baby's face if that is possible. I know the one I had for Hannah, her head was right down in the carrier. She was only 4 months old when I stopped using it and was still small enough to be facing me, she would lean back in the carrier that would hold her in place and also not allow others to touch, if any of that makes sense.
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