How do u explain to ur oldest son the just bc all of mummies time is spent with ur autistic brother that u still love just as much as ever or even more.
That is wat my 7yr old son thinks all the time.
I do not know wat to do as I am worried that he is slipping away from me and if he does do that then I may not be able to bring or get him back
my 6 yr old is autistic and so my almost 3 yr old is the one who often misses out.... I now have separate dates with them both cause i was missing out on time with my baby girl......
my daughter and i go off to a cafe once a week min and have a cake and drink together
my son and i get time to do stuff alone too though sometimes it feels like its all appointments...LOL
My daughter and i have cuddle time when my son is in the bath ..... we all cuddle of a morning for 20 mins together in mummies bed as well
I take my kids to nannas seperately as my autistic son is very possesssive ....This also gives me more time with them separate.....
hi im not to sure if this is the way to respond to ur comment but it was the only link that i could find
thanks heaps for ur words of mega wisdom it sounds as though u have been at this a lot longer than i have i hate sometimes its like i just want to give up chuck in the towel and just be done with it all but then i look at my kids and think well if they didnt have me who would they have. there is my mum but she has had 3 strokes in the past 12mths so she isnt able to do much as i also have to look after her. like please dont get me wrong i love my kids with more than just my heart but sometimes i think that im doin worse for kyle (my 4yr old) than better
Hi there! One of the most important things is to take care of yourself first in any caring role. To take some time out for yourself. It sounds as if you are so busy that all your time is with your autistic son. I have a son with Aspergers I know the extent that a child with autism can take up. Try to set aside some time a few times a week where it is just you and your 7 year old even if it is for an hour. Its great that your seeing his warning signs of him slipping away.but he is not too old to save. He will remember these special times with you and he wont feel left out. Sometimes we can just burn ourselves out. Explanations can fall on deaf ears and actions speak louder than words. Good luck!
if you cant get some alone time woth him ,, maybe you could include him with helping his brother and tell him how much he helps you etc,, praise him etc,,,,
Or maybe if this is possible at all, but you could have a special few hours where you spend time only with the child that wants the attention every month?
This is such a hard thing to deal with isn't it? Is there any activities you can include him in.Such as helping you look after his brother etc.could some one look after your youngest little guy while you spend some one on one with your eldest big guy? A friend of mine had an autistic child,and a non afflicted child as well.She found as long as she gave her daughter one on one time each day and kept re assuring her of her importance in the family things worked out fine (they had their moments though lol) I think you are doing a marvelous job,and it is just a matter of finding your feet and also getting a bit of a support system going so you can spend some time with your eldest and hopefully some time for yourself.Can you get some assistance from family services(gaining a respite carer perhaps)so you could may be have a day or even a few hours a week?wishing you the best regards Crystal
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