Help is on its way!!!

It is not unusual for siblings to fight (for whatever reason ), and some parents might even say it is not unusual for siblings to physically hurt each other. However, your older child is presumably bigger and stronger than your younger child and, as you have seen in this instance, can hurt your physically considerably. Even children of the same age and size can really hurt one aother if they use unacceptable means to solve their problems. 

Bring the two children together. Tell them that every one has a right to be safe at all times. Set simple rules such as 1. Only use kind words 2. Use words not actions 3. Keep your hands and feet to yourself . Write these rules up and put them where the girls can see easily see them. You might like to stick a picture or photograph (or even a drawing) to illustrate the behaviour that you want. Of course, you will write these words in your own way. Just make them brief and positive (eg use kind words rather than don't swear).

When a child breaks one of these rules, and that will happen. Quietly and definitively say to the child. I cannot allow you to --speak to x in this way/ hurt x in this way. Remember our rules or have you forgotten our rules?  Let's see what they say. Read the relevant rule to/with the child pointing to each word and the picture. If the child starts to say, she did this to me first or something of that nature, tell her that you will speak to the sister in a moment, but you are talking to her about what she has done first. The important part is to deal with the child in a calm and no-accusatory way. Suggest what she could do next time something like this arises. 

Finally, taking the time to help your children learn the social skills they need to play happily together is rewarding. You might think a four and a two year old are too young to talk to in this way. I can assure you that you will be  pleasantly surprised. Add a little bit of adult modelling and . . .

This is normal for sibling i agree with evryone else on this. My 2 are always at each others throats and im throats. My youngest just has to touch the oldest sometimes and she cries endlessly. And then the big fight has started for the day. I can keep going on but found i have to step in by the end of the day to enforce the law. Good luck i hear it does get better.

Hugs Tee

I'm sorry to say that this is completely normal.  The question then is, how do you stop it?  I found a very effective way to stop the fighting.  When they fight, they BOTH get punished no matter who started it.  I would do any of the following depending on the severity of the fighting......ground them from their favorite games, tv, time out in seperate rooms and/or chairs facing the corner in separate areas of the room (they HATED this one). Then when the time was up they had to both apologize to each other (HATED this even worse!)  It worked though, they would actually tell each other to stop it because they would get in trouble.  I also got a calendar and when they were put on restriction, I marked the day that they would be off of restriction on the calendar.  That way it made me stick to the exact time and left no room for giving in and letting them off early. This is very effective as your children get older. It only takes a couple of times of following through before your threats are good enough.  Hope this helps!