Oh, If only you could find a good answer to that one!  Here's the thing... Life is full of ups and downs, of good people, bad people, polite people rude people; I think you get the idea ;-)  What I'm getting at is that while you are never going to be able to change other people (good, bad, or indifferent), you DO have the ultimate power on how YOU will react to them. 

I know you said you "can't ignore them any longer." Any you're right.  The moment you said, "can't" you assured yourself of just that.  I would suggest taking a good look at why you feel so defensive about people making comments.  While I know rude comments are not welcome, the "people coming up to me everywhere I go" suggests that you may be experiencing something other than rude behavior from others; and a deeper issue that gets triggered by what you perceive to be personal attacks.

All in all, it really doesn't matter what other people say about you; as long as you are happy with yourself.  Does it take the sting away from thoughtless comments?  No, but self-promoting comments towards yourself will.  Proclaim to yourself throughout the day that you are a good Mom, and you are not being judged by others...you might be surprised what a bit of positive thinking can do to solve this sort of thing.

I'm a person with disabilities who relies upon the assistance of a service dog.  I get all sorts of comments, like kids shrieking, adults snickering or whispering, or people saying outright; you are not allowed to bring a dog in here!  Some people are rude.  There are twice as many who are nice.  I choose to ignore the rude ones, convinced through my own personal faith that God will deal with them in due time, and pay attention to the affirmations that I get from the kindness of others.  Start looking for the good, and leave the bad where it belongs; ignored and powerless.  ;-) 

I will be 25 in two months and really just started work and people there thought i was 16-19 they where very surpised that i had a 2 year as well i just don't let people get to me about that cause alot of the older peopledo look at you differently because you look younger but i can't wait till i'm 80 then maybe i might looked in my 60's. try not to let it bother you cause you know how old you are and thats all that matters if you are looking after your child/ren properly

oh annoying, i'm sure.  i think the best way to deflect this is to respond in the most mature and calm matter.  you can say something as simple as "oh no worries, i've got it!"  if you aren't defensive, it will make the point without you having to be too confrontational.  lucky for you, this will pass with time.  :)

I was pregnant with my second child, and ran up to the pharmacy for something and an elderly lady said to her friend, "Did you see that pregnant little girl"  I could not help myself I said I am 25!!! But thank you so much for thinking me a little girl, but how embarassed you should be for saying so!!!  In all fairness I had my hair in 2 piggy tails that day!  LOL.... but I have learned with the people who decide they should parent my children to say...".WOW!!! Since you are so great with kids I could use a baby sitter saturday night. Are you available?? "  They usually stutter and tell me I am rude!  And I smile so sweet and say "Right back at cha!!! " Dont let it get to you!  Or I say this is my 12th child, I am an expert!  (really I only have 3)  Or I say while looking at my child, "too bad you didnt come with instructions"  I always have a smart remark....Just my thing I guess.  Good luck!!!

hi im in the same boat 25, one child and look like i am 14 get asked for id if i go out get asked if i go shopping, you know the usual drill, but what really gets me going is when... and this could be a long one. when people snarl at you for having a child and no ring on your finger normaly the older generation as younger/middle are a little more liberated. its bad enough i have a two and a half year old going on 35 in the middle of the super market screaming because she wants to shop too or wants something off the shelf that all i really want is a derogatory remark from someone whom without we, couldn't live as freely now due to the past but thinks they can also run the future generations as well. i even had someone say to me when i was paying for shopping once that youngsters shouldnt be given credit cards by their parents as it encourages them to live off the gravy boat so to speak.....  i really did reach boiling point then turned to the gentleman in question and said 1st of all this delightful screaming angel is mine and i had her when i was 22 no 11, if he was such a fantastic child carer why wasnt he on telly with super nanny explaining to many other parents how t raise them, i also retorted that i work in a mans world as a car engineer so whatever i decided to spend on myself or my family was up to me and last but not least pointed out that the card i had was a debit not credit card and said if i cant pay cash and you really want something its worth saving for...... hence to say with that he put his basket down and said how rude i was. well he started it as far as i was concerned!!!!!!!
after that little rant im going to make dinner for my family of 27 whom i beared with approx 26 men but on the last its between 7 men so not sure on that one ha ha ha

Well, u can handle this in 3 ways...1) ignore them completely..i wouldn't as this a too good an opportunity to pass up!  2) roll your eyes at them and say "gee, I get that all the time. I guess I am just lucky to look the way I do. You would think I would look older and tired but Im really only 18 and considering i have another 6 with their fathers on their access visits..which reminds me, I should get moving, it is gonna take me hours to go from one house to another picking them all up!"...3) Smile and say thanks for their advice, tell they u use oil of ulay moisturiser and seeing she has offered u advice, maybe u could offer her some back...recommend she try using it too!

Nothing like a good come back!

one of my friends samantha has the same problem she is a mum of six and is a hot mama at 26 cause she looks after herself. i have seen the looks she got from people and the comments young healthy mothers receive from complete strangers and it is heartbreaking that the people we are meant to respect would treat the younger generation of parents like this. i say state you mind and tell them this "i am a young healthy mother who is quite capable of caring for her own child and if assistance is required i will ask for it". i did that once in a friendly/sarcastic voice to some elderly ladies when i had just had my son (at 21) and they attempted to interfere on a bad day. it did the job. whispering behind my back, so what i don't know them from a bar o soap! respect is a two way street and in this case parents should stand their ground. ::) becca!

Aaaarrgh!! I'm 25 and people are convinced I'm 15. They smile at me looking after my "little brother and sister" until my 4 year old comes up and calls me mummy, at which point they are utterly horrified and disgusted. And then the litany of parenting help pours in as if they expect me to accept the word of a random stranger on the street on how best to care for my children.

Someone said it a couple of comments ago, just smile, say, "thanks for your help but we're fine," and move on. There is nothing like showing that you are more mature and putting them back in their places. It also sets a good example to your kids on how to deal with difficult people with equanimity without being a complete push over. And if they are persistent (I love the persistent ones, they usually are the ones with no children of their own), then I break out the raised eyebrow sarcasm, about how I wouldn't be taking advice from someone who jumps to such misguided conclusions about people and their situations. Better yet, do it with a smile, like you find their efforts cute and amusing. I don't know many people who can continue to hassle someone who treats them like a mere distraction and doesn't break from a calm and centered demeanor.

I'm having problems with this too when I go out.  Not because of my age, but because I seem to have a sign on me that says 'just part of the floor!'.  Maybe you could whipp your id out and show them you are older!  Or just go into cranky mum mode and tell them it is not their place to tell you how to do your job!  As for people thinking you are her sister, tell them you aren't!  My partner is a lot older than me and he keeps being called my dad or even grandad! lol.  We have lots of fun telling them he is my husband! lol.

Smile at them.  It will let them know you heard them.  If they are commenting about your age, go up to them and say, "Excuse me, did you want to know my age?".  Watch how red their faces will get.  It is a good thing to look young.  There is always that "helpful" type of person in the stores that just can't help but be concerned about someones child.  Next time just tell them thank you.  I used to take my cart near a managers desk and ask them to please tell my kids about not standing in the cart (and of course they were standing lol)  I wouldn't say it loud to where they could hear me ask them but it helped reinforce what I was saying to them regarding No standing in the shopping cart. 

Overall the best advice I can give you is what someone gave me.  "Do not let people, you don't even know, have that kind of power over your emotions."  Do not let it bother you.  Easier said than done but with practice it gets easier to ignore them and just whip them a quick smile and walk on by.  I hope it helps. 

I was in the military too and looked young for my age...I still do which is kinda creepy sometimes.  But I do know how you feel.  I didn't feel that I should have to say my age or throw in that I was in the Military to get respect from someone that already had a low opinion regarding my parenting skills.  Because as soon as you say something about being in the military, their tune changes 100 degrees.  How messed up is that one? 

Hang in there, your doing great. 

Sincerely,

Aaliyah

You know, I realised when I became a mum that as parent ,no matter what you do, someone will think you are doing it wrong! And a lot of them don't mind telling you! lol

I guess as I was 36 when I had my daughter I had a bit more life experience & think I took comments a lot less hard than younger friends of mine. (So if it wasn't your apparent age it would be something else!) If anyone made a comment I would just smile & say 'Thanks, for that but we're fine" & move on.

YOU know you are doing a great job as a mum. So at the end of the day it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks or says.

I know exactly how you feel. I usually make a joke of it and say, wow, I am flattered, image what I will look like in 10 years at 41!!! that will make them think a bit...I always see and have been the subject of parenting comments and advice that is unsolicited by strangers who feel the need to say there bit, maybe because of their own parenting inadequacies or need to be perfect. I might say, thanks for the pointers, I know she is really determined to stand in the cart, sometimes kids have to learn that if they do they will fall. Dont worry I'll put her in the seat, thanks for the note...and sometimes I have had some really interesting comments and I have had to just ignore them and talk to my child in a really happy way as if I am not taking notice of the real world - especially if you are in the middle of a tantrum!!! if nothing else works, vent it out at Ask Mony a really awesome Minti group ;0)

hi, as annoying as it maybe there is nothing you can do as we live in a society where some people cannot keep their comments to themselves and a lot of people are extremely judgemental.  You have 2 choices you can react (therefore lowering yourself to their standards and giving them the fuel they need to make themselves feel validated in what they are saying) or you can choose to ignore them and know that the people who love and care about you, including yourself know the truth and that is all that should matter.  Look at the issue as their problem, they obviously have nothing better to do with their time then to butt into other people's business or spend their energy analysing other people when infact maybe they should be taking a long hard look at themselves as I am sure they are not perfect.  If I were you I would just put on a big smile, direct it their way and keep moving.  You choose whether you let these people affect you or not!

Love the fact that you look younger.  When i go out with the girls I always get asked for ID and I am 27 years old.  I always say do I really look 17 to you but if u think so thank you! Just think when you are 40 you will look 25!

Best of luck and I hope that the comments stop.  You are doing the best job you know how to do and that is the main thing. 

ignorance is  a very big problem!!! i feel for you people are so judgemental . jumping to conclusions . i wish i could could give you the solution. i understand if you try to explain the situation you are justifing yourself, and why should you? ignore it? i also understand that it still gets to you and it ruins your day  especially when you are going about in your merry way. its a tough one !!! i also would be interested what others have to say. whilst i havent been in that exact position i have a similar problem. for the last 10 years (except 2005 when i went overseas and i missed our winter) i develop a nagging cough for three months of the year. it only clears up in september with spring coming on. i have been to numerous doctors who eventuallt gave me a lung capacity test. im sensitive to the cold weather and my airways constrict.im on puffers. when im out and about doing my shopping in the supermarket  i have little old ladies come up to me telling me i should be home in bed !!!! i cant exactly hybinate for 3 months of the year , and why should i . i dont get other symptoms . its an allergy . im sick of explaining. i was even in the chemist after visiting my doctor trying to pick up my prescription puffers  and a little old lady started having a go at me. im a polite person and i dont like confrontation . again i feel for you

Don't know if I will be of much help but I have the same problem... at 37 I look really young.  The other day I was out with my son and an elderly woman said to me are you baby sitting??  I just looked at her, carmly said no! then I laughed and said well actually yes I am my own kid.  To that she just walked away and so did i. 

u could try making a joke of it or just flat out tell them the truth, 

Well thank you so much, for your, input, however at 24yrs old, hehe, yes I do look young are't I lucky. and ? many years as a ? in the Military, I think I am old enough and experienced enough to make a reasonable risk assessment for my child. Thanks again for your concern, Have a nice day. Byeee.

That help any.

Luv Winnie.xx