Hi, You have been given EXCELLENT advice from everyone!!! I have worked with many children with medically diagnosed foetal alcohol syndrome due to the areas in which I have worked. THeir behaviour is usually NOT the main problem. There are often distinctive facial features, poor growth and physical development. There are also the huge learning difficulties that they have. I would say that maybe you are having difficulties coping with your daughters challenging behaviours and the longer that you blame yourself for this rather than dealing with it ( you can get great advice and assistance on techniques to put this in place, but it does take consistancy and perserverance) the worse the behaviours will become. There are not many Mum's I know that are not reduced to tears at times because of their child's behaviour! Having other Mum's to chat to ( I  have a couple of friend's that ring me in tears saying they are completely at the end of their tether due to a combination of their children's behaviour and sleep deprivation! After they have had a vent and a chat, they are much happier! I do it myself at times when I have had ENOUGH! ) However, you do need to keep on top of the behaviour- reflect on what's working, what's not and why! There is no magic thing that works for every child ( unfortunately) If children have no boundaries, they will run amok!!!

If the problem with your child is that your child is naughty, that is not due to drinking alcohol while pregnant. A lot of us have naughty kids, especially in the toddler years (actually, they are difficult at this age, but they are not doing it out of malice). So do not blame yourself for this. If you find yourself not able to cope with your child's behavior, please seek public assistance in your area and I suggest attending playgroups. You may find that other parents are dealing with the same situation as you, and that it has nothing to do with alcohol during pregnancy.

Drinking large amount of alchohol during pregnancy can result in Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. If you want to know if your child has been affected, I suggest reading  this information on Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/fetal-alcohol-syndrome/DS00184/DSECTION=2

http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancycomplications/fetalalcohol.html

http://kidshealth.org/parent/medical/brain/fas.html

Hey honey, don't beat up on yourself. My opinion of what doctors say is taken with a grain of salt. Things that were OK when I had my first 2 boys to the 3rd one 9 years later were so different it wasn't funny. You are not and were not an alcholic that could cause serious problems in pregnancy. A couple of glasses now and then can't hurt.

I personally don't watch any of the current affairs programs cause they all contradict one another and things go through cycles every couple of years and the current affairs programs only put the controversial articles on to get people to watch them.

So DO NOT blame yourself. Children go through stages (please tell me the teenage one will end soon!!) and they become naughty and misbehave, or are perfect little angels. If she is naughty then take steps to stop the behaviour. Do not accept it.

Not to be really harsh, but it sounds like you are using it as an excuse not to do anything. Be proactive and get positive. This in turn will hopefully reflect on your daughter and her behaviour. If there really is a problem then you need to see a doctor about it and get referrals to a professional.

Leisa

cheer up! its no that bad, i was pregnant on holiday and all i did for 2 weeks was drink, sorry i had no idea i was pregnant, not untill i came home and still felt bad!

all i know is that my midwife told me that everything in moderation is good, when i was pregnant with my 1st, 7 yrs ago they all told us not to eat prawns, then this time when i asked, it was ok to do so.... so many things and advice change that we are lucky if we dont go mad.

just remeber that the human race has survived this long and not all of us have done as we have been told! certainly dony worry about it, 

Hun you and a few million other women drank while unaware of their pregnancy. You and a few million other mums continued to have the odd glass throughout. Fetal Alchohol Syndrome is not a given and developemental problems such as ADHD/ADD happen to children who's Mums never touched a drop. However if you are at all concerned that your childs behaviour is developemental, then discuss this with your doctor and ask to be refered to a child psycologist for diagnosis. The blame game achieves nothing for you or your child at this stage, it could simply be that you have a very bright little one who is a bit frustrated or bored or is very Independant. I would dry up my tears, pop along to the doc and ask to have your conerns investigated. If all is well, then it might be best to seek out an aternative parenting style for you and your little one. Good luck and best wishes.

Winnie.x