I think people should be allowed to hug whomever they like when ever they like I certainly believe that if we were more affectionate towards eachother we'd certainly have much less anomosity, fear and stress.

Having said that I was working with a young man 12 years old who is also very much like your son and he saw his friend get hurt and start crying and did what he had been doing naturally he hugged him. The trauma that poor boy went through because of the nasty innuendos, taunting not to mention the loss of the friendship was horrendous.

Some boys learn naturally what is considered "socially" acceptable and others do not and in this sad and pathetic world we live in the harsh reality is that your son is very likely to become a victim of bullying both overt and covert and it could crush his spirit.

As much as I would like to say let your boy be I also know the flipside and he needs protective behaviours as well and this includes not hugging the girls, sadly this can even be labled sexual harrassment in children as young as yours. Our society in general lives by a very strict moral code, especially in school and playgounds and until our society matures and accepts all people as they are we need to provide our children with survival tools and unfortunately one is keep your hands (and hugs) to yourself and your family.

I feel awful for what that father did to your son, to imply something so nasty to someone so young is appaling and yet so indicitave of whats going on out there. Dont stress about boys being boys, they have that sorted themselves however I do think you should consider making your son bully proof and there are many great books around to assist with those skills.

 

boys (and men) should absolutely be allowed to hug each other and they should be encouraged to do so.  i could say more, but i don't want to be on a soapbox here!!!

I agree with the previous piece of advice. However you can teach him a close hug and a mate hug which is more a side by side arm around the shoulders style which is less confronting - its not an 'in your face' hug.

Now is the time to teach him personal space as well - he needs to learn that everyone has personal space and he needs to be aware that not everyone thinks like he does.

Whatever you do, don't put it in a negative way from his perspective. The negative should be placed on the other person.

good luck

My 5 yr old son is the same, no you should not stop him been affectionate, but it comes down to respecting other peoples personal space.....  When my son started school this year he wanted to hug his new found friends all the time and it was not appreciated by many of them.  There is no problem in a boy or man giving their mate a hug if the hug is wanted, but when a child or an adult forces a hug on someone its really not appropriate.....  Telling him its only ok to hug girls is in my opinion not the right thing to do, like I said there is nothing wrong with showing affection to either sex.  I have told my son not to stop doing it rather if his friends want to hug him to thats ok but he shouldn't go around trying to hug everyone when the hug is not wanted.....  Hope all that makes sense lol  Goodluck you sound like you have a wonderful little boy x