It does sound as though he is just a big kid himself.   It sounds like he needs to work out what he wants in life, and actually start being a man.

I think DA (see, she is still haunting us!) has given a lot of helpful advice, but I am willing to share some of my tips if you minti mail me.  Sorry, not disgusing my (currently non existant) bedroom life in public view!

The three most common times for a relationship to break down is during the time of planning a wedding - because of the extra stress and pressure; after having a baby - again, extra stress and pressure and lack of sleep; and after several years of mundane bordom - when one or both partners blame the other for it and go doing selfish things to liven up their own life, rather than find a way to liven up their lives together in a way that benefits both.

You have just had a baby. That puts a lot of pressure, stress, lack of sleep, changing hormones for you, and an increased sense of responsibility for both of you. He may be having trouble adjusting just as much as you are. Don't feel that because he's gone a little cold about the idea of getting married means he's less interested in you. It could be simply that there have been enough changes in your lives already that he would rather leave the extra stress of a wedding to plan until things have settled down.

As for feeling forgotten about by him, there's probably a lot on his mind as well that is occupying the space he'd normally have reserved for you. Guys don't like to talk about their emotions and problems. They get annoyed if they are pressured into doing so and often end up resorting to saying what they think you want to hear or go in the opposite direction and say something just to tick you off because you are ticking them off.

Probably be a good idea to just stop him in his tracks one day and bluntly and blatently tell him you aren't happy, tell him why, what is pissing you off, and what you want him to do about it. Don't go getting all emotional about it, stay factual, stay calm, keep it simple, and make sure to have a clearly defined "This is what I want from you" conclusion. If you don't have any idea what you want him to do about helping you fell better, how on earth is he supposed to figure out what will work? He's a guy after all!

If all else fails, take a little holiday to your mum's for a week or two, cheer yourself up, and see if fondness makes the heart grow stronger... but if you do that make it clear to him it's just to see your mum and not a step to breaking up or he might think you're taking that first step to leaving for good, might get suspicious of you seeing someone else, and might even go and do something stupid that he'll regret later while you're gone (if he thinks you're up to no good he could take it as a licence to do the same).

Good luck with it matey.

Well sounds like the others have got your answer allready, I do think if its all getting to you go to your mums for a few weeks. While your there pamper yourself, even if its only a bubble bath and a picnic. Hopefully out to dinner.

Dress up and make your self feel like just you, Im sure your mum and bub would love to go out for dinner.

Good luck, and its always the hardest in the first 6mths!!!!

Good luck xxx Nicky n Jade

Honestly just the stress of a new baby alone can be enough to send you mad. It's like all the small problems you had are exaggerated because you need to support each other, work as a team and in this time of tremendous chance. If things feel unbalanced it can turn ripples to waves.

I can't advice on his behaviour only on how you say you feel. You can only chance or control your input to the situation, remembering things may be out of wack at this time.   If you feel you are doing your best to express your needs to him and he doesn't get it than I would do what you need to get them met and make that clear, men have a way of tunning out when it sounds like a constant whine, to us it so frustrating repeating our needs over and over and they switch off after the opening sentence. Too feel good about yourself and to regain control of your situation in this relationship, you need to feel 100% you are doing your best to be a part of the solution.   Try being proactive in a way comfortable to you so you can move on with finding a solution knowing you have done your bit. Be the partner you want him to be. How can you expect change when you don't inspire change..Be the leader, the smart woman that you are, you can create the ideal relationship for you and he may will follow without struggle at all. Remember his birthday, compliment him but not for the purpose of receiving, but to make you feel like a better person and your positivity will lift the whole thing out and into the next chapter  marriage if you want that. If it doesn’t you have your answer and you can keep at peace knowing you tried.   I know my husband and I go through ups and downs.... long story. . I have felt like you have many time before but things are a lot better when I take this approach and a lot less drama.   It’s only my advice and I know how hard it is to be the better person, I understand your situation with isolation being in north qld, I know it can be upsetting to be forgotten and mostly you need love as well being a  mum. If all else fails, take some relaxing time to your mums.   Good luck

As Danni said. He may not realise that what he is doing hurts you. A friend of mine just recently left her boyfriend. Their bub just a few months old. After she left he asked why, she finally told him all her reasons, and he said to her, why didn't you tell me, we could have worked it out.

Now as women, we expect our men to know  what we want, we think that they should know us well enough to know that we want a necklace for our birthday, or an engement ring for valentines. But you know they are such different creatures to us and unless you litterally take them to the jewellry shop, point to what you want and swipe the card your self you aint gunna get it! Well that may be a bit dramatic. But what i'm saying, is that you really need to TELL him. Straight forward, striaght to the point.

After you have told him, one of two things will happen. 1. Your relationship will improve greatly. You will get more help, more attention and hopefully more sex... OR 2. He will not change. That is when you have to make the decision if you want to stay with him or not.

I hope this helps and i hope that you can work it out. xox

Hey,I have the same problems with my bf and him not wanting to do things together.Im 17wks preg and have been with my bf for 2years.In that 2years we have probly gone to dinner 4times.Im at home all day and my bf still doesnt ask if i want to do something so im very bored.I didnt get a christmas present i doubt ill get anything for valentines day but i find out the gender of bubs so thats the best thing i can get anyway.March 30th will be my 18th and ill be 24wks preg,i want to go to dinner but i doubt he will want to and once again also doubt he'll get me anything for my 18th..I think communication is the main problem,so maybe sit down and talk to your partner about how your feeling as he may be unaware..majority of men are selfish but i think as they mature they snap out of it,well im hoping so.

Anyway,im in the same boat as you and i think talking will solve alot of problems,or maybe some time apart. He may then realise that he is doing wrong and needs to smarten up.I hope everything goes well and dont leave without talking it through cos he may not know what he's doing wrong.

Dannii xxo

sweety what you need to do is have a chat to him and if you are not satified with his response then say you are going away for a week or 2 to your mum's. spend time there chat to mum and see how you feel.

not to be mean or anything but men can be jerks and dont get it unless drastic things are done.

good luck with it