hi - i am new to this forum and found your message by searching on the topic because i am having the exact same problem with my three your old.  I would be really interested to know how your getting on and what you have tried.  I did find some advice which suggested to make the child go and get and then change there own undies and trousers and then make them put the dirty ones in the washing machine.  I did this yesterday as well as had a chat to her and told her if she wanted to wee herself then she would have to clean it up herself and today for the first time in three weeks she went to the toilet without even telling me and we had only a poo accident all day!  Early days yet but might be worth trying.  The next thing I will probably try is putting the nappies back on??? i dont want to but I have had enough!!!

Although I am no where near this I did ask my Mum  what she  did when she potty trained me

Basically she put on a pair of knickers next to the skin with the nappy that way the wetness would be felt if I did not use the potty.

As you can imagine I did not like feeling wet and when I complained she simply just said Oh you should have gone to potty.  Oh we will get that changed in a minute and made me wait just a little while but enough to think about it.

She told me it only took a week to potty train.

She also mentioned that I should be potty training at a years age.  I asked her about this as the nurses where I went said 2 to 3 years but both my mother and mother in law said every child was potty trained at a year and I have subsequently found that those who use cloth nappies tend to train earlier.  Just wondering if anyone else has found the same thing.  

You know yours daughter best and probably have a feel for what her reaction would be to the tough love treatment or going back into nappies? Each child is different, so go with your instinct. Myself, I have a tough nut, she has to make her own mind up to do something - no amount of pushing will achieve results without her co-operation (though mummy can use plenty of reverse psychology to get that LOL!) so if it was me I would sit her down and have a chat about why she has accidents, be all sympathetic " this must be really hard for you, you've been dry for so long, shall we put you back in nappies for a week or two til you're properly better and then give knickers another go when we're at home, and nappies when we're out, see if you can get it right here first?" And then do a sticker chart with a 20star prize for dry knicker days? Just take the pressure off both of you for a few weeks, then give her a friendly count down "this time next week we'll give it a try, eh?" sort of thing. And dont worry about Preschool in September - it's ages away but I bet if she still has a problem by then she'll sort it out quick around the other kids. If not, that would be the time to see a dr. She's been dry once. If peer pressure cant fix it, then there's something odd going on.

My suggestion is to yes, go ahead and go back and use pull ups if it's going to save you and your daughter frustration. I'm sure there is some frustration in your part, and your daughter may be picking up on it. I think it's important not to get upset with accidents, as they are normal.  My son just turned 3 and has been potty trained for 6 months. But once in a while, he will have accidents, and there was one day where he had 2 accidents. I just noticed he was wearing different pants when I picked him up and asked casually about it. When he answered me, he hung his head down and looked on the floor and he said he peed on his pants. The disappointment on himself was so obvious! I told him with a calm voice that it's absolutely OK and that there was nothing wrong about it.

Anyway, I think you may have to just remind your daughter to go every couple of hours or so.  It will probably not take her long before she's no longer having accidents.

Good luck.

my son was a difficult one. I hated doing it be we had to resort to "when you decide you want to be a big boy then we can get you some more big boy underwear" he pee'd the bed nightly , I would put him on a potty and as soon as the underwear were back on he would pee them , he wanted no part of it. At about 3/12 yrs old he said mommy I dont want to wear pull-ups. So we told him we would let him try but if he was lazy and decided he didnt wanna use the potty we would stick him right back in a diaper.

Since that day he has NEVER had an accident. He decided he wanted to do it , and he did. Ahh it was wonderful.

Hi,I don't have girls but did have my step daughters live with us for a while.One of them wet the bed and regularly wet during the day,she also pooed once in her pants.Both of my boys had never wet the bed at all and I found it really hard and stressful to cope with.But,after getting advice from the school nurse the thing that worked for us was a star chart.It took a few weeks but eventually it did work.I also gave her treats if she was dry for 3 consecutive nights-colouring pencils or a book,nothing too big. They lived with us for 7 months and by the time she went back to her mums she was totally dry.I do know though that she is still doing it at her mums.That's all the advice I can give -sorryxxx

Oh what bummer!  Children really do push the boudries all I can say is DO NOT GIVE up.  I will be harder and harder as she gets older.  Does she have a little friend that is toilet trained?  Get this friend over as much as possiable and let the do their thing as she start to learn.  Children learn the best from other children. 

 make up a routine as well maybe?

While you get her brekkie let her sit on the potty and read or watch tv.

Then get dressed in her BIG girl undies.  I found with my daughter the big girl line really worked.  If she does not go. Do Not get her in trouble just say oh well hey may be next hey? 

Then from there ask her every half hour do you need to go? Then watch for the sign have her sit before and after meals and drinks before you go out and when you arrive some where.  Find out every public toilet on the way and way back and have a potty in the boot of the car and a large bottle of water with wipes or toilet paper and plastic bag.

If there is an accident don't  be hard on her ask her why she held on "where you to busy playing?" etc etc and say to her next time tell me any we can go together. 

If you can stay at home as much as possiable and have toilet training boot camp.  Make it fun and let her she that it is fun. Not just a chore where you clean up the mess and if she does make a mess get her to help clean it up as well. Yep tell her to go get the whatever and that's when you can talk about what happened and why in a good way don't make it a negitive sitiuation or she will get worse and worse.  Yelling and screaming will just make you feel better for about 2 seconds till you see shes scared or not listing at all.

I hope this helps and good luck

Amy

Sometimes my kids would have accidents and i would remind them not to hang on for so long. Maybe keep reminding her after she has a drink or meal. The star chart is a good idea. Making it fun should help encourage her.

Good luck

My sil had this problem with her son and was absolutely freaking out that she even took him to the doctors to have him checked out...

The doctor ran tests and found nothing wrong, and suggested to my sil to just perservere and he grow out of it..

Well she came to me and asked what did i do for brodie to get him toliet trained, and i did say to her that all children are diffrent and what may work for me,. may not work for her.. So any way i said to her, that we used to make it fun for brodie,. so we toddle off to the toliet and he would sit there while we read a book or sung  or just general chat., may sound weird but it worked... Eventually i said to him to show me how big boy he was...

We also had a sticker chart, and so at the end of the week he would get his favourite toy or book... so maybe have your little one have a chart and see if that works...

All the best, and if it means a few little accidents, praise her,not scold her, and just remind her that to try to get to the  toliet quicker next time and if she isnt sure to ask a grown up to help her get there,,...

xxx cazza

We are still having trouble getting our 4 year old to use the potty, and we have been trying with her for 2 years!  If you come up with the magic formula for success, please let me know!