Hi there,

Is he participating in ay outside school activities? I know that on a budget it can be a bit of a stretch sometimes, but maybe he is asking for some attention?! Perhaps talking to him about how he thinks he can improve his love for life, something that is structural and a positive growth platform.

I think that something like an instrument, guitar, drums maybe? Youcan pick up entry level cheap pieces from ebay, my daughter has a guitar, which she will start lessons with soon, I know its noisy but the way my 12 and 14 yo brothers have "pulled their socks up" has been pleasantly surprising with them now they have something they are genuinely intersted in to focus their energies on.

Scouts are also a good idea, they are definitely not fro everyone, but they do offer a vast variety of indoor and outdoor activities with a strong community support network within the movement. This is a real door opener for opportunity, meaning that they get to experience just about everything hat life has to offer for a young man or young lady.

Another thougt I had for you, depending on your location, is the DIY project classes at the Bunnings Warehouses, They are free and friendly!! I have taken my children along to many of these workshops,  and they get a real sense of accomplishment from it, perhaps becaue he is a twin he is seeking some self identity attention (which by the soiunds he has already accomplished)

Hope this is helpful!!!

hey there,well what can i say ...i am in the same boat mother to three boys aged 9,6 and 4 and our son who's 6 just loves to be the bearer of all bad moods and situations it's so hard to know what to do ......i feel lost alot of the time and  use to avoid any situation i think may bring out the worst in him(which for the most part is  everything )so i have  now taken a different path and have  dropped alot of  the punisments for him and once every three weeks i keep him from school when the other two are at school and have  a  full day of me and him one on one time and it has worked wonders ,i hug him first before yelling  when things are getting heated and 7 out of ten times the situation is defussed ... i also have found asking him what happened first in any situation has helped  defusse as well ,as i think kids with this type of personalitiy(trouble,strong willed etc) need to know they are believed every once in a while (it makes a big difference with my son) anyhow i hope this helps a little and good luck

We have very similar issues with our 8 yr old boy. I agree with Libby, foods can play a big part in our lives. We actually had our boy on TEGRETOL under a specialists directions, but after 4 days stopped. I found a brilliant book called "FED UP" by Sue Dengate. It has become abit like a bible in our house with all 3 of our boys.

Please feel free to minti mail me, and we could talk more.

Hope to talk soon.

Melissa.

My sisters son was aggressive like that and always wanting (negative) attention, it was very stressful.  His poor younger sister usually took the brunt of his actions at home...anyway, it was all the dairy products he consumed.  Once my sister cut most of the dairy out of his diet he calmed down so much it was hard to believe he was the same person.  My nephew is 30 now and he has turned out to be quite the young man...very much  a family man...the young boy he had been all but forgotten.

Good luck with your son, hope he turns the corner soon then you and your family can live in (relative peace, I say that because you will soon have teenage twins..lol).  Take care..

this is a tough one. sometimes children just crave attention they get it when they play up. iknow its hard just to focus on one child.

i wouldnt say ignore him because he will do it more.try a little  psychology on him try TLC (TENDER LOVING CARE) or try not to punish himin ways like sitting on a chair for 15 minutes in the middle of the room .

it hasnt worked anyway . im just surprised that he is a twin and seems to be totally opposite to his twin.

i know experts are meant to know best but sometimes their advice could be wrong i dont know what is right but  at the same time if he says its not his fault at times he is right.!!!

you see in the teachers eyes if a goodie goodie asks him a question and your son turns around to answer and the teacher sees this then it has to be him that is the disruptive one it cant be the goodie goodie

im only using this as an example but im speaking from  some experience it used to happen to me.

i have a problem with one of my supervisors at work i diont have problems with the other supervisors but this one in particular "i feel he is ready to pounce on me" and he pounces on me.

funny enough if other staff do something of greater degree he "lets it go"

im not saying that your son is right but i bet there are times that he is getting blamed when its other peoples fault.

maybe (and this is a time factor) you might have to spend time alone with each child . so that way you can try to gain his confidence and find out if there is something bothering him.

discipline isnt always the correct or right thing to do because sometimes there is a hidden problem thats causing all this.

he will be going through puberty soon and his physical and mental state will be going through a lot of changes

as you have realised and said yourself  there is no point taking away  things that he likes

i just think that a totally different approach might be better because as you say discipline isnt working

annie

Hello....

I have minti mailed you....

Take Care, Chin Up.... Your not alone....

Frogie x

all i can sugest is to wait and see the doc. to me it sounds like ADD/ADHD but i dont want to lable your son.

web search for ADD/ADHD and look for natural things. there are so many foods that set the off like bread, apples, juice and a few vegs and meat.

good luck and let us know how it goes.