If she is already having sex then there is nothing you can do. telling her she cant have sex will fall on deaf ears. Instead be impressed with her maturity for carrying around a condom. That shows responsibility if nothing else. I would breach the topic with her, first telling her that you need to ask her a very important question, and telling her that you will not be mad, and if she is getting her on the pill. it isn't encoraging the behviour it is being realistic and keeping her safe. if you do get her on contraceptive remember to tell her to always use a condom as well to prevent STIs.

Well, sadly, there isn't much you can do if your daughter is having sex.  Personally, I'd be rather proud of the fact that she had the condom in her wallet, it shows that she is responsible.

Be honest with her and let her know that you are proud that she is being responsible, and tell her that she can come to you and talk about it more.

you poor thing. i have a fifteen year old and you should look on the bright side if she is having sex then she has the sense to have protected sex.  just chill and let her tell you in her own time or you could bring up the sex debate and ask her does she need anything if she is having sex and that should put your mind at ease.   Another way is to let her and her boyfriend stay in her room overnight as i do with my daughter. then you know that she is safe and is having safe sex.

Hey,

Alot of girls at my school use to just carry a condom it there wallet, it was a kool thing to do lol.

I think its good that she is using protection if she is having sex, at least she isnt using nothing. I think teh best thing to do would be to have a talk. I wouldnt tell her you found the condom. I would just say, Im not going to be angry if you are, but id like to know if your having sex or planning too soon?? if so, id like to take you to the doctors to get you to start the pill.

I know you might not like the idea of her having sex at 15 but seriously girls are doing it at 12 years old these days and for her to have a coondom handy just shows that she is smart and protecting herself.

Sad, but true, wether you like the idea or not, when she wants to have sex, she will.Its something you cant stop.

I was 1week away from turning 16 when i lost my virginity, all my friends did earlier but i didnt follow. I am still with the guy i lost my virginity too and ive never been with another guy.

Dannii xxo

Sex at 15 isn't that unusual. I know this is your little girl but it is something that is going to happen. You can't stop her & if you act like the enemy by getting upset about it she will only want to have sex even more, just to spite you. The best thing you can do is talk to her but make sure she understands that you are not angry. It's ok to let her know that you are disappointed as you had hoped she would wait longer, but be supportive.

I don't think you can entirely blame your ex. Kids at this age have sex, it's a fact, no matter who they are, who they live with, what sort of upbringing they have.

The fact that she has a condom may not mean she is having sex though. It could just mean that she is being prepared, which I think is a mature thing to do. Teens often carry condoms in their wallets/purses/bags for years before using it. At least you know she is being careful.

Talk to her, support her, & ask her if she'd like to go on the pill. If she's going to have sex, she's going to have it, no matter what you say or do, so at least help her be protected.

Maybe sit down with your daughter and begin with something like:

"When I was your age my mother had a talk with me and now I am going to have a talk with you..."

Then have a general discussion about sex. Why people do it, expectations, contraception, etc... If you feel comfortable doing so maybe you could talk about some of your own experiences. She will either say "oh mum how embarrassing, I don't want to talk about sex with you" or she may give some input into the conversation.

If you find out that she has had sex don't react in a negative way even if it upsets you...whats done is done...Talk about getting her on the pill even if she says she hasn't. Like Jess said use her periods as a reason for her to take it if she isn't already.

Perhaps all her friends carry condoms and she has one to just to fit in. Remember - finding a condom is not as bad a finding a OPEN condom packet.....

This is a tough one, because if you let her know you found it, she might start talking about privacy and how you may have invaded it, with all good intentions I know...  (I would have done the same thing to get the card) but she may not have seen it like that...

I'd say wait a few days collect your own thoughts think them through, then sort of try maybe a heart to heart with her, don't mention the condom.

If you do think she is having sex, maybe you could start your conversation by asking her if she is on the pill, I don't know maybe you can slip some stuff in there about regulating the periods.  If she is having sex, I guess you can't really stop her from doing it, but at least you can make sure she is safe, this might not help but at least she has a condom. 

Personally I think I to would be at a loss for words to say so if this does not help I am sorry...  But if my mother had asked me I don't think I could lie about it.. She'd see right though me...  If your daughter seems a little more mature then other 15 year olds, maybe a good heart to heart will bring you closer... 

I wish I had something sensible to tell you, but I really don't know myself and wish you all the luck... And um if you work it out, I'd like to hear back as to what you did...

GOOD LUCK...

Personally what I would do is get her to sit down with you. Have a cuppa and cake or what ever and just ask a few Q's and tell her you will not be mad at her even if you are. you have just got her back from what i gather so you cant expect her to change what she has been allowed to do straight away.

all you can ask is she be honest and be careful if she is having Sex and you be there for her if something goes wrong.

be thankful that she has a condom in her wallet, at lest you know she is thinking about safety.