Can your sister speak with your dad and let him know that she has plans? I would hope he would understand and be reasonable about the situation

The only thing I can suggest is that your sister tell your dad the things she has to do that weekend..

My husband and I are aware of the fact that one day his daughter will ring us up and say she does not want to come to visit on a weekend because she has to many other things to do...

Who knows, maybe your father will understand that she is a growing girl.. I think their comes a time in any fathers life when they have to realize that their daughters would rather choose their friends for a weekend. Does not mean they feel any different about them....   And sometimes they may just want to stay home...

I wish I could help but I would at least to try and keep the peace, just tell your sister to be honest with him, if she does not want to tell him she does not want to visit him then just say that she has all of the other things that she'd like to do that weekend...

Good luck

Hi, it might not help you but my niece is in the same boat.Her dad has a court order as regards visitation but it is only on the understanding that she wants to see him.If at any time she doesn't want to go, she doesn't have to and can't force her.This may be a different type of order but that is the one ny nieces dad has.Good luck.

Lisa xx

Hi there,

There laws here tend to vary from country to country BUT one thing  is certain, at 14 your sister does get a say and most countries will take her opinion on this in any court proceedings . .

It would be best ideally if your father would agree that she should attends her softball. Your father could use this time to go along and watch your sister in action and it could be great for their relationship . .  I hope this course of action is what happens as it is a fair one and one that perhaps you could suggest . .

The other side is that she can simply tell your father that she doesn't want to come this weekend and hopefully he will accept this. . .  He can go to the police but as your sister is 14 then I very much doubt that the police would do much BUT if there is any bad blood or nastiness between your mum and dad then taking this approach could cause a lot of problems . .

I hope that your sister is able to handle this situation calmly and rationally and that she does get to attend her softball.

Cheers Kellz

Being from the US, I know that even though the father has a court order to be allowed to see their children, I think once they reach 12 years, or if it's stated in the order a certain age, the child can refuse to visit.  My parents have joint custody of my brother and sister, and my brother has chosen never to go to see my mom (for person reasons)  She is at that age, where if protested in court, the judge will most likely side with it being up to the child.  He can't actually make her visit him, that I believe is against the law, or frowned on.  I think though for your sister, she should tell him the reason that she does not want to go, because of her game.  She does not have to say anything else in that manner.  And if he tries to get her against her will, well that is kidnapping, so he's not going to do that.  Good luck, and let her know that she has a choice and a voice and for her to never let anyone pressure her into changing her mind.  Been there, and it's not fun.  If you want you can minti mail me if you have any other questions.