I am so sorry for your loss. Have you planted a tree for your little one? Many people plant trees to honour lost ones - it's something that will be there forever. You could also put a plaque at the bass of the tree. I also saw a good way of honouring a lost baby in a magazine recently - a woman had lost a baby & she made a memorial display in a cabinet in which she placed photos, hand & foot prints, toys, information about her baby - basically whatever she had so that others could see it.

Have you looked for support groups in your area? It might help you to get in touch with other mothers who have gone through the same thing. Ask your doctor or local community centre if they know of any such groups. Maybe you could find some on the net too. As a mother I can only imagine how you feel. I think only mothers who have been through it can know exactly how you feel.

All the best hun.

Firstly id like to say how sorry i am for your loss.Its very hard indeed.Its the anniversary of my father-in-laws death today and we are going to light some candles on out mantle ,perhaps play his fav song and just remeber all the good times.

Its a sad time but also celebrating the life that was not the one that left you is a better way.Perhaps you could get something engraved with a lovely poem or words that when ever you look apon them they will give your heart a lift,that Cameron although not here is deep in your heart and mind for always.

I think keeping his memory alive is a wonderful way for you help heal from the loss of your baby boy.  I think something that may help you and be a wonderful thing to do for him is to write him a letter.  Tell him about all the things that you remember from the pregnancy and his birth, but only the lovely memories.  Write about your thoughts of him as time has passed and what you wish for him.  If you do have any pictures, you can make a mini scrapbook of your pregnancy and after he was born.  Even putting in pictures of other family members at that time and little notes for him on how you felt in those pictures.  You can even light a candle for him on that day and place it in the window for him.  But what ever you do to remember him, it will be something that comes from the heart.

Also, if you have not done this already, and if you are really up to it, write a letter to the doctor.  Tell that doctor exactly how you felt, and how you still feel.  Don't hold anything back, write down everything that comes to you.  The more you write, the more pain you will be able to release, and let yourself mourn your babies loss.  Don't tell yourself anything other then it's ok to be upset, what ever that upset is(anger, saddness, frustration, etc).  Then when you are done with that letter, seal it in an evelope and put it away.  Sometimes the best thing to free our deepest pain, and to help heal those deep scars is to reopen and clean out those wounds.  By writing you can feel free in what you want to and need to say, while not hurting anyone. 

My heart goes out to you and I hope that you can have a wonderful anniversary and remeber him with love.  Take care.

I'm not sure that I am the best person to advice you here I really hope that someone else comes up with answers for you.

What did spring to mind tho was you good have a tree/plant (rose bush) planting ceremony in your back yard in his honour.  The death of one and the gift of life of another.  You will always have that tree/plant to watch, grow and nurture.

Sorry for your loss and I hope that you find some sort of peace.