Sounds like we have the same kid...

For my son, I just ignore it. Sounds horrible, but you get used to it.  Once you tell him to wait, you make him wait.

My son does the whole drop to the ground thing, chucks a tantrum blah blah blah.. At first I used to give in.. But these days he gives up on me and tries it for himself..

Each time I do go back to help him, I show him what he needs to do, in the hopes that he eventually works it out himself. And for some things it works.  

I wish I could give you the exact thing you need to know to fix the problem, but I don't have it either.  I have learned to ignore the  tantrums, and he is slowly learning that mummy does not listen very well when he is in that kind of mood.    But I believe that our sons are just going through a faze...

Good luck...

 My 19 month old already does this, but doesn't know words, so it's just a lot of incessant whining.  So I feel your pain.

However, when he doesn't get a different cup, or can't have 2 cookies (gramma once gave him 2--one for each hand--and it's been a tough one to break)  no matter how much he screams, he stops whining about it and drinks his juice, or eats the cookie he already has.

If whining and tantrums work for him, gets him what he wants, he's not going to stop any time soon.

I would suggest standing by your "no" or your "wait", and investing in some earplugs. :)

ahh yes i now the feeling i have a 2yrold who does this all the time to me, in the end i got so feed up with it i threw out her bottles and gave her a sippy cup and she also now only eats her 3 main meals and has 1-2 snacks inbetween, and if she cracks it at me for taking to long she goes without it until she either stops the tantrum or she appologises, so far this is working. and as for the playing im not sure because my tot wont go and play she rather hang off me.

hope this helps a bit.

This is really normal. Don't panic.

Its part of their natural development. They need to test how much power they have in their environment. And its part of the individuation process. Physically, the umbilical chord is long gone, but mentally & emotionally, its only just begun for him. Its important for him to know that he doesn't have all power over you & he isn't going to like it.. & he is going to let you know he doesn't like it. Thats OK. Stay calm. Let him know you don't like the behaviour & that you do like him. It will pass. It might feel like forever (just as night-feeds & nappies felt like forever). You can start injecting the need for "please" & "thank you" around this time too. So he can learn those magic words will get him things a little quicker. Sometimes a prompt helps; I used to catch my daughter's eye & touch my ear-lobe. It got her the reputation for being very polite b/c others didn't see me doing it. And she found out for herself that adults bend over backwards to accomodate the requests of small children who lisp "please" & "thank you" in their requests.

Its all a learning phase. Stay calm. Visualise how you want your child to behave & then figure out how best to encourage that behaviour. And then be consistent in the face of every circumstance, to avoid confusdion. A lovely age; every split-second is full of learning!

hugs

Rosalinda 

Sounds like he is a typical toddler.  All gets when they don't get their own way are going to push the boundaries.

The key is to not give in to their demands.  When his train derails of course he's going to want you to help him fix it, but if you are busy, then MAKE HIM WAIT UNTIL YOU CAN HELP HIM.  That means turn deaf to his whining and finish up what you are doing first.

The reason why it has become a problem is because you do give in.  You change what his drinks are in because he wants you to.  Stop doing that.  Tell him if he isn't going to drink it from what you give it to him in, you will tip it down the sink and he will miss out.  Might take a couple of tipping outs before he gets it, but he won't learn unless you stick it out.

It is hard.  Our kids are the same, but we never give our ground.  They have to wait until it is convenient for us to fix something or get them something.  Yes, we sometimes have tears and tantrums, but they are learning to be more patient (as are we) and I think we are finally getting there with them (about time!!!).

This demanding behaviuor if not stopped now will cause you bigger problems when he is older.  He will expect everyone to drop everything to help him and NOW.  Please try and switch off when he whines  and just keep telling him you will get to it or he can miss out when you are finished. 

It is actually a form of manipulation, and let's face it, us parents want to be the ones in control of our kids, not the other way round.

My boy is impatient too, but we're slowly working on it and he's improving slowly but surely. Sometimes my husband and I would talk, and right in the middle of it, our son would talk loudly to either me or his Daddy. Most of the time it's alright, but sometimes when we're talking intently about something important, we'd rather not be interrupted. So if it was me who he wants to talk to, I'd turn my attention to him and say, "Give me a few minutes and I will pay attention to you." Of course this didn't work the first several times. I always had to turn to him and say, "shhhh. Patience. Shhhh. Let mommy and daddy finish talking." And then when I am able to talk to him, I praise him and pay complete attention to him. I tell him, "you see? Now I can listen to you. Thank you for being patient and waiting."  Nowadays, he tells his sisters, "patience. You have to wait!" lol

Also, at this age they don't have a concept of time. So if you have an egg timer, you can introduce 3 mintues of cleaning up until the timer goes off, or 2 mintues of whatever it is you want to do and for however long. Your child will get used to this, and pretty soon, if you say, "wait just 5 mintues", he'll know that all he has to do is wait for a short time. We do this for our son too when we put him to bed. He likes me to lie down with him for a short time, so I do. We tell him an arbitrary time of 5 minutes, but the problem is he asks for more. So now I use a watch that his a timer and when 5 minutes is over, he doesn't argue.. (well, sometimes he asks for another 5 minutes but after that he's alright).

I hope that helps a little bit. Good luck.

Hi,

Has this just started in the last few days? The reason i ask is because my almost 3 year old starts this when he is coming down with something. He just wants things done then and there.

The other thing with the juice in the wrong cup i would ask him before you put it in the cup that way he can decide and if he throws a tantrum just walk away because you have given him the choice.

Hope this helps in some way, Good Luck

Juzzy