Well I cannot relate to this. My son was watched for a weekend at 6 weeks old. I had really Bad PND and my MIL saw it and he was on the bottle so she stole him for the weekend so I could relax and get my head together. she still does this ( This weekend actually) My daughter was 4 months when she had her as I was breastfeeding.

I cherish my weekends away from my kids and tomorrow I am having a day to myself as my hubby is out all day. Oh and my kids are 4 and 6. I loved it when my daughter was born and my SIL (who hadnt been there for most of my sons life as she was in China) had my son while I was in hospital and a few days after. Even now she has them for a few hours when she wants them.

Other people can look after your kids just as well as you. The only problem is telling them YOUR parenting and getting them to do THAT. I am lucky as my MIL and SIL's all have the same idea as me, so apart from a few issues we are fine (I just dont like them letting my kids on the pc all day, but it is educational stuff as they as all teachers)

Hey I was like that too, until I remembered that daddy was a parent to, and I learned remembered what freedom was.. :)

I still have the odd time where I don't want to leave him with any one else...

But what I do is time myself around those that I know Francis is content with... For example I know he loves going to grandma's and his Aunts, so as long as he is happy then so am I...

When he was a baby, my MIL offered to look after him one day a week to give me time to recoup.  At first I said I'd think about it, but hubby made me do it, and I am so glad I did.  It really really helped me...

There will be some people who might not do it exactly as you want it done, and there will be some who do it exactly the way you want it done...

Just start off with giving daddy a go first, it gets easier from there.. And remember you can always call to check up on daddy..> I know I did.. And the strange thing about that is he was already a parent before he met me. It was just me being well a mother.. :)

I say good luck, and trust your husband to do what is right by your child...  It took me some time to realize that he was our sons parent too if you understand what I mean by that... Basically I guess what I mean is that he wanted some responsibility too and I was not giving it to him, I hogged our son... But then I remembered i had to share him.. I was horrible.. :) But these days I have no problems as long as I know my son is going to be happy where he is going then I am totally ok with it.

It is a normal feeling, however you owe it to yourself and your baby to try and address this, so that it isn't too distressing for you in the future.  She needs to have some independence from you, and you need the same from her.  She will not be able to spend the rest of her life in your presence, so allow yourselves a little breathing space now; it will make life easier in the long run.

What are your real fears?  Perhaps you can write them down, and discuss them with your hubby.  Between the two of you, you may be able to rationalise them, which will make it easier to deal with.  Try short periods of time that you go and do something nice with friends and slowly build on it. 

its very normal and more mums should feel that way in my eyes my kids are 7 and 9 and i have been that way and i find it hard now that they want to go to friends and i say no i have all the kids at my place and always invite first to get out of sending them

kelly

With my little boy I was stuck at home and couldnt really go out so I had the same problem as you.... The 1st time i left him alone with someone other than me it was with my In-laws for a full weekend (I freaked the whole time he was gone my bf couldnt keep me calm), the next time he went away it was without me but with my bf and I didnt freak as much because i knew my partner was there.

I reckone just leave your child with someone for short amounts of time and then slowly extend the time so that you get use to it and not just dumped in the deep end like I was.

I can relate to that.  My husband has to force me out of the house on occasion.  And, when I do go out, I am super quick because I don't like leaving him with our girls for too long (not because they can't cope with him, but because I worry about how they are treating him! lol).

The more you leave your baby with someone else, the easier it gets.  What you are experiencing is perfectly normal.  And you are right, you know your child better than anyone else.

It does you and your baby good to be separated from each other even if just for a short while.  Your baby will be more socially accepting of strangers and new people and you can have some you time, which is a must as a full time mother.

I suggest that you leave your baby with your husband for a while, and just go for a walk around the block.  Gradually increase the time you are away, and pretty soon, you will be enjoying your freedom and expecting some one to take your little one so you can have a short escape.

Recently, I had to travel several hours from home on my own (we don't have a very good car) and was forced to leave my 4 children in the care of my husband for the day.  Now, I thought I would stress so much being so far away and for so long, but, and I actually felt more guilty about this, the truth is, I actually enjoyed my freedom and the company of another adult!!!!!  It wasn't really until I was due to come home that I started to think about how much I missed my family.  And you know what?  The house was still standing and so was hubby and the kids.

Take the plunge, and do it for your baby!  The more you do it, the quicker that feeling will go away.  Right now, you worry about the abilities of others with your baby, but how will you ever know if you don't give them the chance to get to know that precious little being on their own?

hi, i felt the same way with my firstborn. my mum ended up giving me a good ol' lecture about how i was being selfish and that it's not good to be locked up all day with only a baby for company, and that babies need to form attachments to other people! i have been told though that it is a symptom of post natal depression. not sure if that is true, but it may be worth talking to someone about? maybe you could go to mother's groups with your baby and talk to other mums in person. at least that would get you some adult company and you may start to relax a bit more with the idea of one day trusting someone enough to look after bubby!? not wanting to presume anything, but if you had 'bad' things happen to you as a child or even as an adult, that would give you a predisposition to not trusting anyone. You probably ARE the only person at the moment who knows what she needs etc, but that is only because you are the only one who spends any significant time with her. have you tried letting hubby "look after" her while you stay in another room for a little while? he needs to form a bond with her as well. i have troubles with my second child now because i didn't let anyone else look after him for 3 years! i was a single mum then, so it was only him and i and my elder boy, but my now 4 year old has quite bad separation issues, which is really hard to deal with.... i hope it all works out for you....cheers...

I think it is quite a natural and common feeling shared by most Mums. I believe it will pass as your baby grows and becomes more independant. I think though we have to guard against making Daddy feel that you dont trust him. Babies are resiliant and forgiving, if Dad is a little late with a feed, or puts the nappy on the wrong way,LOL or even forgets to put Bubs down for a nap in the accepted way, no harm is going to come to Bub. The question is, will your Baby suffer any lasting physical or mental trauma by being left with a loving Partner or Grand Parent, if the answer is no, then try and relax and enjoy your little break from the routine. The change of carer for a little while can help to build the bond between Father and child, GrandParent and Grandchild and so on. It also teaches, independance,tollerance and confidence in your child to be loved and cared for by a few.

I was at home alone with my first all day, and bless as my Daughter got older, she postively loved to be made a fuss of by others. So please try not to be too harsh on yourself, and relax if you can. Just think of that lovely welcome you will get on every return from an outing, and the appreciation of each other which builds as you spend a little time apart.

Take care. Luv Winnie.xxxx

I know the feeling,I too was the same with my babies though I did find by the age of 8 months or so I was a little calmer about leaving them with family.