Hi,

Maybe your wife just lacks confidence in dealing with these health problems.

Sometimes we love our children so much that we are terrified that we will miss something and they will die.  I have all the knowledge to manage my daughter's asthma etc. but I still have that knot of fear in my stomach when they are ill. 

Be gentle with your wife.  Maybe you both could attend the parent courses provided by the Asthma foundation and a first aid course that covers children's first aid.

Remember that she is most likely motivated by the love for your children.

I know someone who has the above and it is very serious indeed.

I agree with the post about it perhaps not being Munchausen's but a depressive or anxiety based situation- either way, all involved would benefit from some sessions with a counselling psychologist. How do you introduce this idea? Well, very very carefully. First of all, you are coming from a place of love, not judgement and your wife needs to understand that. So try to introduce the idea of counselling using "I" statements rather than "you" statements.

"Honey, I'm really worried about the amount of pressure on you regarding the kid's health. I feel like you have to deal with so much and it must be so hard" etc is going to get a waaaay better reaction than "Why do you always have to have a big drama about the kids, what is your problem"

Feel free to minti mail if need be, have had some experience with this sort of stuff.

K

Whilst its always good to be alert before you jump on the Munchausen's bandwagon consider a few other less but equally important illnesses. Is it possible that your wife is suffering from a depressive illness  or feeling overwhelmed by the responsibility of caring for her children? People think mothering is a natural thing to do and sometimes its not.... whilst magnifying illnesses can be something as serious as Munchausens or Munchausens by proxy you need to tread carefully. If your wife is already feeling overwhelmed she will react badly if she feels attacked, make a list of ER visits and why ask her if she feels it was necessary to go to the Er of if any of the visits could ahve waited until the next day, ask why she felt it was necessary to go to the ER....listen to her response. Next I would talk to my family Dr and explain the situation and your concerns and have her come in for a visit, be guided by your Dr.

a family friend has this, goes to the hospital for a cold cos she thought she had influeza, found a rash and thought mennigicocle (sorry cant spell it) she even broke her leg so she had a excuse to go.

 talk to your wife and tell her your doin the talking not her so can she please just hear you out.

first of all let her know you are concered for your childs health but not every little thing needs hospital treatment. tell her shes over reacting a little and if anything serious was to happen then you'd be the first to take your child to the hospital. also let her know by screaming at you or threating you is not doin the child any good as children will pick up on the vibes.

 if you are really concerend let your doctor know about this he might be able to treat her illness.  though people who have munchausen normally need "special help" from the drs. she not only putting you at risk but your childs. whose to say she could hurt the child just for the attention.

hope iv helped a bit