ok this is important .does he want to stay married to you? my advice to you is as i told my girlfriends who have had the same problem.and i can tell you its worked with them .
after he leaves for work sit down and write down in a piece of papre everything that annoys you or you want to change ,and have a blank piece of paper.
do your normal chores like usual,stay out of his way in the morning be silent until he goes to work so he has no reason to get angry,make sure your not going to have any visitors or distractions ,feed the kids early ,put them to bed early .then when he is home have dinner ready and cooked so you dont have to be doing that ,have a drink ready ,set up the table romantic like and after a hour of him relaxing .have dinner together,if he says anything sarcastic like "what have you done " or " what are you sucking for " just aswer nothing "just thought we could have some time together.
no matter what he says when he gets home dont argue just ignore it no matter how nasty.
then after dinner when you have no kids to annoy you or want your attention sit him on the table or couch and tell him you need to talk,if the tv is on turn it off have some relaxing music instead to keep him calm ,if he asks whats going on just ask him to wait a minute and find out .
then very quietly tell him how you have been feeling ,and that you made a list and you would like him to write down all the things that he finds annoying about you,and what he would want to change ,no matter what just keep telling him to do it if he cares about you enough he should give you that much.
dont get angry no matter what breath deep.
tell him everything how much he hurts you incidents that annoyed you and that you want this things to chane and that your happy to compremise .
then see what his list says.
even if he works thats no excuse to be a lazy dad.my husband and i have 5 kids he helps out more than usual but we have an understanding that while the kids r babys i dont bother him during the night or ask for him to change nappies ,but i expect him to be there for me emotionally .we ahve been married for over 10 years .
if all goes well then just keep compremising and have more time alone even if it means putting the kids to bed early .just kissing or hugging watching tv together playing rocky as you probably did when you first meet.turn back the clock in a way :)
but if he refuses to help keep your marriedge together then tell him if he dont want to be married to you to get out of your house ,some men being threatened to lose their family could do the trick,but not a good option.
if he does not want to trully help fix the problem then he is the problem and maybe u need a beter man .
