I know the feeling! Like everyone has said each pregnancy and birth is different. My first was awful, she was prosterior and the pain had me redding out (my vision was clouding over red, weird) and had an epidural REALLY early and then had to be re-induced. I like to think I have a decent pain tolerance so it was so very scary for me.

When I was pregnant with my second I used to wake up terrified about giving birth. The full blown terror that you can only feel at 2am while everyone else is sleeping! - But, you know what, it was great! It hurt, yeah, it hurt, but it was ok, I managed, only a small amount of gas and she just "fell out" as my darling husband described it. I was checked at 11.30 and was told to go home as I was only 2cm, I said no, too scared of the pain to be all the way at home, and I had her at 12.45, so lucky!! By the time I decided to push I did a couple of pushes as I shuffled from the shower to the bed and her head was already out by the time I made it onto the bed.

I cant help with the size question though, but my second was smaller than my first. A friend of mine had a whopper first (10 pound boy) and her second (a girl) was smaller at 8.5.

Anyways, the point of my ramble is, you know that every birth different, and it doesnt matter how many people tell you, you are still going to worry, I think it is quite normal, especially after a bad experience, but you will be fine! You have done it before, you have had the worst and you walked away from it with your second bundle of joy. And hey, if it is bad again, you can always ask for an epidural.

Hi, I have 4 babies and all my labours were very different. I also got scared about 7mths into every pregnancy. Knowing that its gonna hurt and you wonder why you ever let yourself into this situation!! haha (no drugs either).

My oldest was the smallest (girl) and my 2nd (boy) was the biggest, 3rd and 4th were about the same and I only teared with the 1st, I think that was because she was my 1st, my body had never done this before and I was on all fours and couldnt see her coming out and when the midwife was staying stop, I didnt and thats why I teared. With the next 3, I had a mirror so I could see and it makes you bear down longer and your actually facing the midwife.

Like what all the other women have commented, every birth is very different and you just gotta go in there relaxed in mind and body. Hope the birth goes well.

 

Here are actually some positions you can try, I used the first one in the second stage I felt that that was easier on my back and caused a lot less tearing

http://www.acegraphics.com.au/parents/labour/positions.html

My 3 labours were all drug free and very quick.

Like you my 3rd labour I didn't actually know I was in labour. I felt pain but it only felt like braxton hicks. I didn't have a show and my water didn't break.

I tell you though I was freaking out. I hated the pain and didn't want to push something out of me again. The contractions were ok it was the pushing to get the head through. YUCK

Not to mention the third they said was going to be smaller than my first 2 so I thought cool pretty happy since they were both just over 8 pounds.

I tell you though he came out over 8 pounds too in I say it was less than 2 hours. I did have a bit of a problem with my back when I was preggers and found that kneeling over the edge did the best on my back and made it a lots easier delivery. I had too laugh at myself after though I thought it was hilarious about the amount of pain I was expecting and the amount of pain I actually had. It is all made better when you do see your baby for that first time.

good luck and enjoy your new baby

every pregnancy and birth is different.. don't dwell on your previous labours (it will make you more stressed and anxious .. .which is proven to make labour more stressful)..... take this one as  a new fresh start...  I have had 3 quite different labours.. each in some ways scarier than the others.. but scarier in DIFFERENT ways the things I was scared were going to happen at no 2 & 3 DIDN"T but other things did instead...

In regards to babies getting bigger mine certainly didn't... again that is different for each baby... bub 1 (4.5kg), bub 2 (3.320kg), bub 3 (3.5kg)...

Read, read, read, get your hands on lots of information so you are adequately informed that will give you more confidence to deal with anything that MAY come up.. but most importantly  remember they light at the end of the tunnell (no pun intended)...just rememvber the wonderful treasure you will get at the end of all your hard work..

Best wishes with it all..

I know exactly how you feel, my first pregnancy was a breeze, idnt care about the extra weight, 3 and a half hour labour and when i was tekn to the ward the girl in the bed asked if i was having more and in answered in a heartbeat 'in about a year or so'. Then came pregnancy number 2. from weeks 10-13 i had threatened miscarriages, i had an irritable uterus and starting having full blown contractions at 18 weeks, my pelvic bone apparently split at 23 weeks causeing me a lot of pain, i put on about 20kg through the pregnancy after losing weight all the way up to 26 weeks, had the most horrible and painful 6 hour labour (i know all you girls with your 20 something hour and longer labours are shooting daggers at me here) with no pain relief (it was promised but htey had no intention of delivering) to find that my baby who arrived a week early was really underweight for no apparent reason at all, despite being told that he was really big by a midwife half an hour before hand. And you know what? Even if I hadn't decided on having two kids, I couldnt have a third. I couldn't bear the thought of going through it again, and my husband has also said he wouldnt want to see me go through it again. BUt in the end, your in that situation, so dont let your past control you. Remember women have been doing this in much worse situations since prehistoric times... and if anyone wants some really scary reading material, research a medical journal that was written in England in the 1800's... scary stuff... I dont think I can ever look at a goose the same! or wine... YOUR A WOMAN! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING !! :)

My first pregnancy was horrible, I had 24 hr sickness, diahhrea through most of it, really bad skin and put on heaps of weight.... my waters broke at 35 weeks and I was admitted to hospital.  I was told I wasn't in labour and that I was just imagining things - the nurses were overheard talking about me and how much of a pain I was regarding thinking I was in labour.  2 nights later after finally believing them I took their much offered sleeping tablet.  At 2am I woke up, vomited, and shuffled down to the nurses station.  After sitting with one of the nurses for a few mins she said "well.. you might be in labour"... I was taken to the delivery room and examined for the first time since being admitted 2 days prior... I was 10cms and ready to push!!!!!  After a complicated and hard delivery and about 52hrs since my waters broke, I had my first born son who was whisked away to the NICU for 5 days due to a collapsed lung.  It was an extremely traumatic time and one that still makes me teary thinking about it even 8 yrs later.

Then I got pregnant with my next one.  I spent the whole time freaking out that this pregnancy would be like the last and I constantly voiced my fears to my OB doc..... once 35weeks hit I was a nervous wreak.  Then at 39 weeks my waters broke, and nine hours later after a very easy and uncomplicated birth my second son was born.

It goes to show that even when you have one bad and traumatic experience, it doesn't necessarily mean the next and subsequent ones will take the same path.  You need to go through each one as individuals and not think and worry yourself (and I know that isn't easy) about the last birth.

I hope it all goes well for you and that the birth is a happy and carefree event.

TOO LATE NOW.

you know you have to do this, and you know you can.  focus on the fact that you have done this before, and be proud.  yes it hurts, and having done some study in pain management, i can tell you that fear is a major factor in pain perception. so don't be afraid.  YOU KNOW YOU CAN DO THIS.

also know that every birth is different.  hell, i had 2 completely different births with the one labour (twins) and my third was different again.

there are so many options with childbirth and pain management.  PLAN NOW.  educate yourself ,as knowledge and reducing that fear of the unknown (even though you have done this before) will also help tremendously. 

you need to think about what position you would like to be in and what drugs you can have in that postition- ie. if you are thinking about a gravity assist position, such as squatting or on all fours, then an epidural is not for you.  look into gas, pethidine etc options.  if full on pain management is what you are after, then an epidural may be for you. but you will need to be on your back, legs up for this.

i personally have done both.  first with the twins i had an epidural, long labour but being strapped to the bed no being able to move was the worst.  my third baby i just had a bit of gas and gave birth on my knees, leaning against the top of the bed (that had been raised).  it was painful (as she was nearly 9lb and had a big head) and i made a lot of noise but at the same time it was empowering and so very womanly and primal and i felt so proud that i did it on my own.

your previous experience does not predict your future experience. 

i'll leave you with 3 things to think about

1- know your options

2-dont be scared

3-YOU CAN DO THIS.

let us know how it goes.

good luck. xx josie

I've only given birth once....and I gotta say IT HURT! but....I will do it again if I have the chance.

Before, I thought I knew how it would be...pain? What pain? I thought at the time. I've had some whopper back probs in my time, plus some other illnesses that had given me alot of pain- and I honestly thought it would not bother me.

But it DID because it hurt, alot, more than I expected and I felt like it would never end. People say you 'forget' when they put the baby in your arms- the hell you do- you don't forget, but you just don't care anymore as all that matters is the new bub. My husband saw EVERYTHING (he was stuck up the business end) and he was pretty traumatised but what amazed him the most was that I had been through this huge thing, blood everywhere, in distress and suddenly I'm holding the baby and I didn't care anymore.

I'll tell you this though, next time I'm having an epidural, straight away. I also gave birth on all fours and I can highly recommend it, the pain was far less intense that way.

I know you are scared, but you can do it. Focus on the end and not the means. And best of luck.