Once again thankyou too everyone who has taken the time to respond. There is certainly plenty of food for thought here!

Cheers to all!

I was never allowed any alcohol when I was a child.  My mom actually made it a point to veto champagne at my wedding because neither I nor my husband were 21 at the time.  Being denied it didn't make me more likely to rebel; I would sneak sips of my parents' beers from time to time, decide they tasted as horrible as they had the previous time I tried, and that would be that for a year or two.  I don't care for what alcohol does to my perceptions, so I'm more likely to be the designated driver these days.

I think there's a difference between allowing a child to constantly have tastes of alcohol to 'demystify' it and allowing very small amounts for very special occasions.  A child shouldn't be given it just because he or she wants it; their bodies are still developing and aren't equipped to deal with it.  A sip or two at a wedding or for New Years' is probably okay, but the key is to be moderate about consumption, just like everything else.

Personally i don't know whether it is right or wrong but i think it is an overall attitude regarding drinking alcohol.  After all, children learn what they live.   If you are too strict it will probably make children (when they are old enough) rebel and want to binge drink, yet it is something we can't be too blase about either.  Perhaps explaining the dangers of alcohol, when and where it is appropriate and at what age...after all it is illegal under the age of 18.  The brain is still developing up to the age of 21 so abstaining for as long as possible probably wouldn't hurt.  In some cultures children drink alcohol, but really the bottom line is be sensible about it and teach your children the pros and cons.

I very strongly agree with you. You know what is best for your children and alcohol is not one of them. What would you do if later on they started to sneak it because they liked it when they got that sip and if they could at those special times why not behind moms back? Just a thought.

i am only a social drinker and generally only drink wine. i have brought up my kids to understand the dangers of drinking to EXCESS but that a drink ocassionally is ok.I have a 17 yr old who has asked several times over the last couple of years to have a sip of my wine when we are out at a social ocassion. i have allowed her to taste it each time. the funny thing is that from the very first time she asked for a sip she screwed up her face in disgust and said she didn't like the taste, but she still keeps asking, i teased her about it one time and commented 'if it tastes so awful why do you keep asking to try?". she just shrugs and says i thought i might like it now i'm older!

Maybe i'm just doing the demystifing bit as far as alcohol is concerned?? it might be different when she gets out with the friends who offer the sweet, soft drink like alcopops?!

All we can really do is educate them in the dangers, try not and come down too hard on them rules wise so they feel the need to rebel against authority and then hope and pray that they make the right decisions when faced with those sorts of decisions.

All the best

traceywestaway

Ask your ex husband if he thinks giving your kids cocaine or crack will help demystify drugs for them too!

I think anyone who was born before the mid 70s would probably remember having a sip of Dads' beer or Mums' wine.  Hell, my mother used to let me light her cigarettes for her on occasion!  And an oft-told family story is that when I was two and at a party with no other kids present, all the adults thought it was "cute" when I took sips of their drinks - then had to spend an hour looking for me when I disappeared, finally finding me asleep behind a couch probably due to the affects of alcohol!!  Not funny in my eyes at all and I would be mortified if that had happened to one of my kids.

However, current research studies into children who drink heavily at young ages shows that those who were allowed to have sips and small drinks before the age of 13 or so, are those who binge drink more more often as they go through their teens.

It is even deemed bad progamming to ask kids to get a  beer from the fridge for the parent on a regular basis as most kids hold their parents in esteem and want to be just like them until they reach maturity.

Adults who have serious drinking problems are also more likely to have parents who drank heavily or were encouraged to taste alcohol as kids.

I would say no, and have never let my kids have sips of drinks - I tell them if they do it now it will kill off their growing brain cells!

Having said that, it is each parents' perogative to decided what is and is not ok for their children.  If you are trying to discourage your partner from doing it with them then get some information from the drug and alcohol websites in your state (usually under health department, or just google kids and alcohol)

I don't think that it is a problem, when I was young we used to be given sips, I thnik it teaches the child respect of alchol, not necessarly stopping the rfebelouis attitude towars it tho.  It also depends on what age you are talking about ging the alcohol to.  My neice is 12 and at a family function the other day she was given a sip of wine.  She disliked the taste, and really only just tasted it with her tongue.

i think teaching your children at a young age about drinking will teach them to respect the stuff also allowing them to have one in front of you (when they are say 16) teaches them to trust you and your rules.

i had my first drink when i was 16. it was christmas and my dad thought it would be alright for me to have a "alcopop". my dad thought that seeing as im with him  not with friends then one drink wouldnt be wrong. 

he had full trust in my choice to go to parties and drink, also seeing i did it in front of him i wasnt goin to go behind his back and get drunk as that would have broken our trust.

hi i'm a mother of 5 and one on the way .alcohol to me and any one who opens thair eyes .let 's say would it be okay for me to let my children try smoking .thay both are bad for us and both leagal both have an age limit of 18yrs .i do teach my children when i see big beer bellys and drunks rushing yelling  inapropreate behavior.fighting .thay see on the news how teenagers are killed in fight's simply alcohol related.put's our crime rate up .my giirls dont like the smell walking past pubs .my hubbie dose sometimes drink but not around children .my ten year old was offerd a tast  she thought it was coke although proud to say she did smell it and said to my freind your not nice .it's not for kid's . i dont want to be sick. she was asked are you going to wait till your older to drink and smoke .she replyed why waist monney i want a nice big house and go on holidays. p.s i do come from alcoholic parent's and no i dont drink rather spend it on my childrens  future. bewear  to much alcohol  for children can get alcohol poison and kidney failuer  manny other things can happen .if its not safe for a pegnate women to drink  why would it be safe to give an infant . good luck  kind regards  

At what age should ONE teach thier children about ADULT drinks? I have two children 6 and 3, I am less than a social drinker and in fact would have less then 20 drinks a year, however I have joked with alcohol around my kids (with no intention of them actually having some), that they try it. My wife says "dont you dare'". My point is this, we as parents need to show difference in 'childrens world' and 'adult world'. Parents need to set limits and boundries. 18 is the legal age for alcohol consumption, so why do so many young adults (and teenagers or younger) think that this is a 'forbiden fruit' and gorge themselves as though a right of passage or as rebellion. I think it starts as a 'GREAT' lack of communication from parents too child. Children DONT need too know about 'adult world' stuff, let children be children. When ONE knows that their child is mature enough to understand about 'adult world' stuff, then introduce it to them. I do not think that anyone should compare previous generation or cultures to todays youth. Times are completely different and their are far more choices and temptations for children today then yesteryear. Too say anyone will or may follow a particular path because of the enviroment they may or may not have been subjected too, can only be determined in ONES own final personality.

In short, the best anyone can do is, COMMUNICATE, EDUCATE, UNDERSTAND, LISTEN and SET BOUNDRIES for children of all ages. HONESTY and AGE APPROPRIATE KNOWLEDGE are great tools on the road to developement for children, so I sit on the fence with this as there are no REAL rights or wrongs

I was brought up with 2 views on this. My Dad believed in the itailian style whre the wine is watered down and all drank at a early age, BUT were taught it is a in moderation thing. ie a glass of wine with dinner is good. where on mum's side my Nan and pop were alcholics and drank a bottle a night to themself and a carton of beer a night or every 2 nights. I didnt like the way the behaved and followed my Dad's thoughts. I believe in it now. My kids have tryed my drinks and dont like most of them. Now I only drink when I am with my friends and that is shots so the kids would not have that.

watered down wine with lemonade is great. I used to have a tiny bit in a glass with the rest full of lemonade.  

But everyone has the right to their own opinion. My hubby is like you and thinks it shouldnt be done. He never had alchol around him as a child from reliogious views (his parents didnt drink) and my hubby got into the binge drinking thing and doesnt have fun until he has downed a whole bottle of vodka. where I can have 2-5 shots and be fine for the night. 

sadly each person is their own and it doesnt matter what they are taught, its what peer pressure they have as to what they do.