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Jjs-mummy001
Jjs-mummy001 | January 2009

biting

hi all i have a 14month old son who is loving to bite at the moment, question is how do i get him out of it. He mainly does it when he is fustrated or being naughty.  i am wanting him to go to day care but heard they do not accept children who bite.

Thankyou in advance :) xoxoxoxoxoxo



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KathrynR1402
January 2009 | KathrynR1402
Re: biting

I would be very surprised if day-care would turn down a child who bites as virtually ALL children bite at some point. Some become persistent biters, but then some are persistent pushers or hair pullers or hitters, etc. Day-care would have no-one left to take care of if they banned them all! I would discuss it with your chosen Day-care and you may be able to work out a strategy together so you are all tackling it in the same way. My DD1 was mostly a pusher, and hated the naughty-step, so this is what we all did, and my DD2 is a hitter and hates the withdrawl of attention (and it being transferred to the hurt child), so that is what I & her childminder are trying to cure it with.

It's mostly a phase and it is happening at the peak of frustration if my memory serves me correct, so as that reduces, he should bite less anyway. And it is true - being bitten by another child does work oh so well. I tried to bite DD1 when all else failed, but I couldnt do it and I'm kind of glad. She stopped soon anyway. It was the pushing that took longer! I felt like wearing an "I'm sorry my child...." T-shirt for ages, and now I wish I had another one for DD2 .



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livsmum
January 2009 | livsmum
Re: biting

My 14mth old did the same when she was frustrated or angry. We tried growling and NO but I think that was too much directed attention and staying on the same situation, which just made her more frustrated.  Eventually, we started to just put her down away from us, look her in the eyes, say no - then walk away.  She would get upset for a short time then walk up to us and give us a kiss & cuddle as she knew it was wrong.  She only did it a couple more times then never again, I guess she realised she got nothing back.  I don't really believe in biting them back as somewhere in their mind they would have to think that if we do it, they can too.  Good luck!



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iamschild
January 2009 | iamschild
Re: biting

I don't knw alot about this one, but I will say this- biting the child back is the one thing to not even try. It can get you in trouble with child protection, and no one needs that over something like this.  biting a child is not acceptable discipline, for any reason. Biting the child just causes extreme emotional harm and doesn't solve the problem.

However, strangly, if he bites a child and they bite him back, it isn't traumatic and does teach them not too....



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Queen-Fire
January 2009 | Queen-Fire
Re: biting

I know a lot of ppl say bite em back, but this didn't work with my son what I did was remove my son away from me but within my sight told him that he had hurt and upset me. He would often go into a tantrum where I would ignore him and after a week he had stopped biting me.



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Tadpole
January 2009 | Tadpole
Re: biting

I agree and have used the method with my four, bite him back not too hard but  just enough for him to feel it and realise that it hurts. I would be very surprised if he does it again after a couple of goes. Ohh and dont comfort him to quick afterwards because he will think it is a way to get cuddles.



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kezzalee
January 2009 | kezzalee
Re: biting

at 14 months hes old enough to understand whats happening so if a firm NO doesnt work as nasty as it sound bite the child not hard obviosly but enough to scare they will realise it hurts and hopefully not do it again it worked with my eldest and had to do it my youngest just last week nasty as it sounds its worth a try touch wood she hasnt bitten again but is only 8 months good luck



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