There were many reasons of course, one of which was that he has school. And I really did not want him to miss school.  And the other one that I didn't tell him was that I could not manage 2 on my own. He is very active and demands a lot of physical activity. I wanted a calm, easy holiday to go shopping and strolling. My little girl allows me to do that. However, I am aware that Sam feels isolated and I feel very bad about that.

She kept asking for her ballet outfit. Why does everything cost so much these days? The ballet leotard thingey would set me back $50 and the shoes another $90. I hope this lasts longer than the martial arts thing... it costs more, that's for sure!

Sam's class had a talk about Steve Irwin. I think that the teacher was probably a little concerned about the effect of Steve's death on the children.  He was such a popular personality with the little ones.

Death is a topic that had come up only once in my family. My father passed away when the kids were much younger. The youngest only know that grandfather is in Heaven - but does not quite understand what it all means. Steve Irwin's death may even be more confusing in that they know that Steve is gone, but he's not really. He appears on our TV screens and inside magazines.  So death is not perceived as a permanent departure.

I dread the inevitable. Explaining death to the kids...

Let's see...

Detroit as in Detroit PISTONS

Miami as in MIAMI HEAT

Chicago as in Chicago BULLS

Phoenix as in Phoenix SUNS

LA as in the LAKERS

New York as in New York KNICKS

and of course, Houston as in HOUSTON Rockets!!

He said to us this morning, "Miami is a hot place". We were surprised that he knew. Apparently he had put 2 and 2 together - Miami Heat is called Miami Heat as a reference to the weather! Good thinking Sam!

I have to learn the names of the players and states of the NBA teams in a hurry too. Thankfully Pat is really into sports and Sam can have long discussions about team play with his dad.

We are buying Sam a map of the Americas and will hang this up on his wall so that he can work out the locations. If only he would take a similar interest in Australia...

Sam was particularly interested in the poisonous jelly fish and killer sharks (surprise surprise). Eloise was just interested in the overall view as she is also very much into the new Barbie DVD "Mermaidia".

The thing to remember when one goes on an excursion with kids is not to be too stressed. I was glad that I took the time to explain, point things out and be in awe of the creatures that I see alongside them.  I was in a great frame of mind as we were on holidays!

We finished up buying a couple of items (limited to $9 or under) in the gift shop for souvenirs.

I think that we had a good time.

It's not unusual for boys to have a sports figure as a hero but I am particularly pleased with Sam's choice.  Yao Ming is a Chinese NBA superstar (from Shanghai, no less) and is the tallest player in the NBA (so I'm told). 

You see, Sam was really starting to question his heritage - probably in a negative way. At one stage, he wondered why he wasn't born Italian. He noticed that he looks different than the other kids. He questioned his black hair, darker skin and dark eyes. He would refuse to speak Chinese to older family members like my mother and my aunties. He would also get quite irrate when I try to teach him a few Mandarin words. He used to say, "stop talking Chinese! I hate hearing it!"

Then something quite wonderful happened. He learnt to play NBA Jam on theX-box and the character that he picked was Yao Ming!! He started to talk about this character "Yao" a lot and one day, I sat up and really listened! (I only heard the bit about him liking basketball  - I signed him up for training immediately - but failed to hear the raves about Yao, the player) 

I rented "The year of the Yao" from the video store for Sam. It was a very inspirational documentary about a young man from China, who went to America not understanding or speaking much English and overcoming his cultural difference to ace it in the big league of basketball.

Sam was captivated!

Now all Sam wants to do is train at basketball and play in the Shanghai Sharks like Yao Ming. I suggested to him that he needs to study Mandarin so that he can stay in China, and he actually agreed!  Now I just need to enrol him in a Mandarin class.

I am much relieved. I don't want him to feel ashamed to be different. I want him to know that he may be different but he is special all the same. As a parent, I try to accentuate the positive in him. I tell him that he is tall, dark and handsome - and smart. And you can't do better than that!

The trip was over about a week ago and the memory is getting old and somehow, I don't feel like revisiting those events in the form of a blog. 

Nevertheless, it was a great, fun trip!  The hotel (W HOTELS) were fantastic! I would recommend the TIME SQUARE W HOTEL (not Lexington) and definitely the W Hotel in Montreal!

The best things that came out of the trip:

(1) R and R: I didn't realise how much I had needed the break. The first night that we got into NYC, I could not sleep. This could be due to the time zone change, but mainly because of separation anxiety from my kids. On some nights, I would wake up at 3 or 4 am and call them (it would be 3 or 4 pm in Perth).  However, by the second or third night, I was sleeping really really well. I did not suddenly wake to check on the kids in the next room or check the clock to make sure that I did not oversleep. 

Then I even started taking afternoon naps... what a wonderful experience!! Especially after a long morning of shopping and sight seeing.

(2) Couple bonding: Pat and I are so usually consumed with work and the kids that we really do neglect each other. The trip was good for us as a couple because we had no other (people) distraction and we talked about anything and everything.  He commented that "he has not really travelled with me", by that I am sure that he meant that I was very "set in my ways", ie difficult!

Pat is one who likes to take the taxi or one of those sight-seeing buses, while I prefer to take the sub-way and walk everywhere. Eventually, we did both - the bus and the walks. So a very happy compromise was reached. The outcome was that we managed to get an overview of the city (on the bus) while being able to check out the side streets of various parts of town.. like SOHO (on foot).

(3) Different experience: travelling with children is never the same as travelling with your partner. While we miss the kids, we were grateful for the "time out" and being able to do things that we could not have done if the kids had come along. For one, we would be always watching the clock to ensure that meal times and sleep times are being adhered to.  The cities that we visited, NYC and Montreal were fabulous "grown up" cities. I am not so sure that they are all that kid-friendly.  We went to musuems, art-galleries, grown-up restaurants, long walks and the midnight movie (MI3)!

So, I am planning my next trip to Tuscany... kids optional!

I said to them, "If you don't want me to go, I won't". Sam and Elo unanimously said, "we don't want you to go". I was reminded last night of that promise I made. Sam said, "I thought you said you won't go if we asked you not to go?"

To make things worse, I was telling off my kids for whingeing so much yesterday. I can see now that they were just really uncomfortable with my being away. Elo (the 4 yr old) was extra clingy... she had her arms wrapped around my neck each and every time that she saw me yesterday.  She also head-butted her brother out of the way when she wanted my attention (strange football stadium type behaviour).

I was feeling quite stressed out by work and packing and cleaning out fridge (things to do before you go away)... so I snapped at Sam when he asked me whether I was only going for 10 days. Arrggh... bad mother.

Later on, I gave him loads of hugs and promised him an expensive toy (as you do ... when you feel that you have to compensate for your absence with gifts), but he only asked for "American lollies". He reckons that they make lollies of a different kind in America.  Such a sweetheart!

It's only 11 days, I keep telling myself! And I will be a much better and rested mother when I return!

I made them each a calendar of 11 squares with a love-heart on the 11th square. They will cross one square out each day and I said that I will be home when they get to the square with the love-heart. Hence, NO EXTENSION OF STAY!!!