Cadence came down with the flu.. Just the normal one though, so thankfully nothing to be too afraid of.
But she still got a phelum cough that's very wet and they can't give her anything because if they do, it will weaken her immune system and make it easier for her to catch the H1N1 virus.. Yikes, so I am NOT taking that chance/risk. It just isn't worth it at all.

Things with me are going 'alright' .. I'm taking it day by day.. If anyone wants to know whats actually going on, minti msg me and I'll tell you. It's actually something good and I can't say anything on here yet until its going extremely good!

But myself, I am going to counselling.. I had my 2nd session on Saturday and had a good cry and got alot off of my chest. I think its going to work.. I hope its going to work.. I am going to make a journal and write a letter like my counsellor asked me to do and bring it into my next session which is on Nov 14 (I go every other Saturday) and she suggested that I go see a physiatrist.. She thinks I may go back into depression and I think so myself.. So she wants me to talk to someone.. I will see how that one goes! I'm a bit scared on that one because I have never been to one myself!

Caker had a good weekend.. She went trick or treating last night over at her Omas place and had a great time. She was a witch.. It was a different witch though.. Her costume was purple, green, orange and pink.. It was quite cute that's for sure! She filled up close to half a pillow case of candy! She was so excited.

Have a good week all.. Hope everything is going well :)

I'm actually thinking about moving into a friends place, its cheaper. Like a 5 min drive from where I live now and I can save money there.. All I have to do is pay rent and go half on groceries.. Obviously pay my cell bill and car insurance but that's it! That isn't bad at all..
Hopefully it will be easier on us both.. I'll be able to afford some stuff now.. Take care of my doggy more, which is a good thing lol!

Caker has been doing good... She's 3.5, almost 4 years old.. I still honestly can't believe it. You blink once and thats it, they're all grown up. I was looking at some pictures of her when she was 1 yr old and I just can't believe how much she has honestly "grown' up. She amazes me each and every day. She is honestly my power to live. If she wasn't in the picture, I have no idea what I would be doing right now or where I would be.

My new avatar picture is up... It was taken days ago.. She wanted a picture with mommy and she got it.. Mind you, her smile is amazing and she likes to squint her eyes when taking pictures sometimes, LOL!

On Saturday (Feb 28) we had a little party for her.. Just family.. Which was ok.. We couldn't afford much.
But she got a few barbies, a bike (that she's learning to ride), some clothes and a little few things.. She was happy and excited and calling herself a big girl now!

We are STILL trying to potty train her.. Yup we are..
It has it's days where she will go and others where she won't go at all. It's quite fusterating actually..
This morning though she told me she had to go on the potty, so I told her to go and she came out saying "mom, i pooped, go look, i pooped" lol.. She actually did, I was quite happy with her.. Hopefully she keeps this up, if so then we're gonna be on the right track.. :)

My car broke down.. Yup, it did.. So I'm without a car right now.. Anyone got one that I can borrow? Something newer, low km and that I can rely on, LOL!! I swear, I have bad luck when it comes to cars.. Hopefully its fixable and not going to cost too much, but I do need a way back and fourth to work..
Today I'm off because Caker isn't feeling well. She woke up last night crying and then this morning she's had a bad cough so I kept her home.. It's best that way. I hope it goes away and fast! I don't need her to be sick again.. We just got over it, not all that long ago : (

We had a meeting today at 1:30pm, all the cashiers that were on today (well that started this morning til 130) and then others covered our tills while we were up in the meeting.. It was pretty long, never got out until 20 to 3pm! Crazy.. It was all about what we're doing wrong and not doing and what we have to improve on. Which is not a problem.
I had a few things to say after the meeting so I did just that. I voiced things that were concerning me and they got answered, Not the answers I was expecting, or some of them anyways but whatever.. They are now cleared and I can go on my merry way!

Caker's been good at day care, going on the potty and everything like that. So I'm happy! I just wish she would do it more at home. I have to tell her most of the time to go, where at day care she goes when she knows she has to! Ahhh, the home life compared to day care life. Wish it was easier, but I guess in time it will be!

Her 3rd birthday is coming up.. Yup, you heard me right.. She will be turning 3 in just a couple weeks.. Feb 26... We will be having a small family party at our house on Feb 28.. I think just hubb's parents are coming over, and maybe a friend of mine and her 2 kids. Not to sure as of yet. I can't believe she will be 3 YEARS OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sure don't seem like it, but yes she is gonna be! My little girl, is not going to be so little no more!
She keeps telling me that her birthday is coming, its really cute coming from her!

Lately she's been telling me that she wants to watch cartoons.. She says "I wanna watch cartoons mom", "how about treehouse" so that's that I put it on.. She loves a whole bunch of shows that are on that channel.. I don't blame her, some of them are good, where others I honestly can not stand watching them.. Like "In the Night Garden" I hate that show, can't stand it BUT Caker loves it.. Igglepiggle she likes the most... UpsyDaisy too she likes (hope I spelt that name right, haha!)

She's being quiet right now watching "Little Bear" which is fine with me.. I remember watching this show when I was a little younger, older than her age that's for sure! Or maybe it was when my niece was born?? LOL.. I have no idea, can't remember that far back!

I'm not allowed to drive for a few days, mind you I drove myself to work this morning (which is 55km from home!!) so I left work after 2.5 hrs of working, went to the clinic and then finally saw a doctor after 1.5 hrs of waiting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Freaking crazy man. Got a note, he said it could last up to 14 days but I can't be off for 14 days, I have bills to pay and well I would go insane if I can't.. I'm suppose to rest lots, so thats what I will be doing. I was sorta sleeping earlier, but Caker wasn't listening and being a pest (her normal self) but worse than ever, so I woke up(it was just a very light sleep), got the dishes in the dishwasher and now I'm back on the sofa, sitting here typing :)

Another note, the court thing went alright.. When I move out of here (which right now I'm living with my ex, until I can find something cheap that I can afford or Calgary Housing gets me in) he will pay me $1044 a month.. that's 80% of daycare costs as well, where I pay the other 20%.. Not bad.. The custody is joint, so 60/40 (me 60, him 40).. We agreed to this.. If we don't agree to anything else, we will have to go to a judge and they will put something in place for us.
We are not allowed to leave Alberta WITHOUT one anothers consent.. That way I can't up and leave and nor can he!

Caker's 3rd birthday is coming up.. It seems far, but really it's not.. Feb 26 is her birthday.. I can't believe she's going to be 3 years old.. Sometimes I think she is older than what she is, but she's not. Still trying to get her to potty train, sometimes it goes well and other times it don't. Only time will tell, I suppose.. We've tried stickers and it does work but we need something that will make her want to go ALL the time :)

I must go for now, I'm getting really dizzy again. I can't wait, few more hours and then it's Miss Caker's bed time.. Let's hope its not a battle tonight, like nap time was earlier today :(

We've been having nice weather since Thursday!
It's been on the plus sides..
Yesterday was 11C out and today is suppose to be 14C out! :)
Oh such nice weather, I'm lovin' it!

There is alot of snow to be melted, I am not sure where it's all gonna go, its gonna be wet and yucky out!

Anyways, things are going 'ok' with me..
Tomorrow (Wednesday the 14th) I have a court date for joint custody over Caker! Yup, real quick huh?
I hope it all goes well.. I am kinda nervous actually.. I am not sure what to do.. My head is ALL over the place right now to be honest. I can't think straight..
I am hoping that things go good and not rocky as what I am thinking they are going to be!!

Caker will be in daycare when all of this happens. I am NOT bringing her with us. I do not want her to be there, so it's best that she's in a place where she loves to be and has her friends with her as well :)

Thanks for all of your lovely comments on my last blog (where I am wearing red!!) I really enjoyed reading them :)

I am not too sure what I am going to be doing from now on..
I am quite confused and not sure where to start and where it's going to end..

Have a good night, everyone!

Wish me luck!!!!

My friend and I.. I colored my hair.. I'm wearing red, which people were saying that 'red' looks good on me!!

Another picture of my friend and I.. From work.. :)
Almost everyone at work, thinks that we look alike..
We both don't see what everyone is talking about.. Hmmmm?? Can you tell ??

There are alot more pictures on facebook.. They were taken from my Christmas Party!!

Well, October 31st, I got a new piercing.. I used to have the same piercing 3 years ago but took it out and now I got it done again.. I love it.. I think I look really good with it :)

BTW I'm on the phone with my mommy back in NS!!

Things are hard.. Especially since my hours got cut at work.. Again.. I didn't think it would happen but it did.. So I am and have been looking for a new one. I hope I get something steady with more than 28 hrs a week.. and more pay too.. Because I can't do with what I am getting right now.. It's not paying the bills at all.. And I have to make whats right for my little family!!

My Jimmy is getting fixed........ FINALLY! My accident was on September 25, 2008... And they never have been able to get ahold of the guy who hit me, he had 3 times to call in and didn't.. So they are going with what the police report says and what I said happened.. So December 29, my Jimmy gets fixed.. It will take 2.5-3 days to get fixed.. Holy crazy!!
I get a rental though, that his insurance pays for.. Yay :)...
Also, I gotta give them $150 for tickets (if there is any while I am driving the car) and since I'm under 25, I can't have another SUV. I have to get a car instead, which is ok with me!! :)

Holidays have been hard.. Especially this year, since first time ever being separted.. No family here and its crazy.. I'm still here and kicking.. For now!! Hope all is well..

It's been long and stressful that's for sure.. A bit of fighting, whenever it is that we talk to each other. He hasn't talked to his daughter in 2 days, he's called but it ended up in fighting and I hung up on him because I can't take his yelling at me no more. I don't think it's called for, when I haven't done anything to make him do it!

I have an awful feeling about all of this, I'll try not to think about it but it's hard not to. I just want the best for my daughter, it's what she deserves!

I'm taking my dog with me and 1 cat  (my bitch, as I call her, hahah) my clothes, and I'm not to sure what else I am taking with me. So I guess we'll see... Hmmmmmmm.....

I shall get going, get some clothes gathered up and bring them in for later! :)

I do NOT want to take my daughter out of her fathers life. I am not that type of person, though I could be convinced but I could NEVER do that to him. It would just make things alot harder than what they are going to be right now.
Just like he said, he doesn't want to take her out of my life. Which is why sometimes I am afraid that when I go out {cuz I don't want to be here when he's home, so I go out} that he will take her and not give her back. That's what scares me the most.

He said he was going to pay for the divorce.. Wow, we haven't even gotten that far yet.. I guess I have to get a lawyer now?? Any help here would be great.. From anyone who has gone through this.. I can't afford a lawyer, so I think I might have to go through legal aid or something.. Though, his mother works for them.. I hope that doesn't cause anything there..

Oh, the stuff I got to go through and I'm only 23 years old.. Wow...

Anyways... I'm still here.. Beginning of a new week???? Maybe, we will have to wait and see.. Sorry there isnt much more that I can write.. Im just not too sure on what else I can say.. Just going through alot right now, stressed and its just not good over all...

Going through alot of stuff lately.. Seperation and trying to find my own place for Caker and I that will allow a dog and maybe a cat...

My birthday is on Wednesday, the 8th... Anyways.. I need to get going.. Thought I would write something at least to let everyone know, I'm still alive!!!

NOT a dent on his truck, only on mine.. HOW nice is that?
Thankfully, Caker was not in the Jimmy with me.. I was on my way to get her actually! Phew for that one though!! :)

I guess we'll see tomorrow once I wake up, how my shoulder is.. Its in a bit of pain when I move it... Eeek?

So far we've gotten Cadence.. You know, I think I might of blogged about this before HAHAHA.. Well not all of it, but most of it.. Anyways, I got her my little pony toys, one is stuffed and one isn't.. That's all so far.. We will go clothes shopping for her.. I'm thinking size 3 and higher.. Probably 4.. But I think I have to go to the "girls" section for that because they don't got it in the toddler section :( So we'll see what happens when we go for her!

Now, I'm just gonna relax while the dishwasher is going, watching some TV and that's about it!!! Night

My blood work showed everything good, same with my pap test was normal.. Good news.. Nothing but good news.. WOOHOO!

I'm a wee tired one tonight.. Thankfully on the drive home today I wasn't tired like I normally am.. Yesterday driving home, I was real tired all of a sudden to where I wanted to sleep again.. GEEZ.. Thankfully I didn't and I hate feeling that way because I just don't feel like myself! I will have to mention that to him again I think.. See what he thinks..

I must go to bed, its already after 10 and close to 1030 so its beddie bye time lol...

Will let you know how my appointment goes tomorrow!! Hopefully its ok!!

Its just funny.. Some people I tell you.. They just.. Well, I dunno.. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Anyways, I get my money back, thats all that matters now!!!

I had 10 days to get out of my contract ON the 10th day they told me not to return.. BUT they will not give me my money back.. Stupid fuckers.. I am sorry but I am NOT happy with them.. They can go pound shit for all I care.. I will NEVER referr them to ANYONE.. They are fucking retards and they will tell you anything to get your money!!!!!! That's exactly right and what they did do to me..

HAHAHAH they even want me to pay a buy out, I don't friggen think so. It is NOT happening.. If they TOLD ME NOT TO RETURN then I AM NOT GOING TO PAY ANYTHING.. Why should I??? I should NOT have to pay a single thing. So I wrote a termination letter (since they told me to, why I am NOT returning) and I did just that. I kept the original copy and gave them a photo copy.. Too bad for them.. If they don't give me my money back, then I am going to go to the media about it.. Stupid fuckers.... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAH

Shit like this, DOES NOT help my blood pressure at all!! OH NO IT DOES NOT.. God I hate people and especially curves.. They can all go screw themselves for giving nothing but lies since I joined!!!!!