Yesterday, I picked up my 5 1/2 year old boy from school. He has a new two square ball that he had taken to school that day and wanted to show me some new tricks he had learnt. He proceeded to bounce the ball in all sorts of combinations. Yes I was very impressed but we had to go. So as we were walking towards the gate of the school, I tell him that he needs to stop bouncing the ball as we were nearing the road. He has been told many times before that balls and roads do not mix. So he holds the ball, runs up to the fence and procedes with his daily ritual of climbing it while I go through the gate. At the top of the fence, he calls out to me to catch the ball. Again, I remind him that we are too close to the road and he is to make sure that he continues to hold it or I will take it off him. "Ok"  he calls out. I turn to speak to another mum I knew, and out the corner of my eye, I see my son run past me on the footpath, and then bounce the ball! He does not catch it and it continues to bounce onto the road in a space between  two parked cars. He is doubled over chasing the bloody thing onto the road, while another car is reverse parking into the space where the ball is coming to a rest! I am screaming STOP! NO! STOP! to no avail. My son pays me no attention and is completely focused on retrieving the ball, no idea of the danger he is putting himself in. The driver of the car, has no idea what is going on and is continuing to reverse. I don't know how, but I reach him just in time. I don't know how, but my arm managed to somehow connect with his so that in the nick of time, i was able to swing him out of harms way, me yelling expletives to god knows who! His head was level with the rear tyre and only a foot away from the wheel if that, when I reached him.

He still had no idea, and with a confused look, he tried to explain that he was only getting the ball. ONLY, FROM THE ROAD!  Even when I told him that he almost got hit, he looked around at the cars, obviously trying to work out by which one. I was too shaken and furious to talk any further and we went straight home without another word. He knew I was mad. When we walked in the front door, I told him that he needed to go to his room and not do anything but think about what just happened. I also confiscated the bloody ball for two weeks. I needed to calm down. After a minute, my son starts to cry about the ball and how he wants it back because it is his. I have no idea how long he was in his room, but eventually he calmed down and came out to apologise for bouncing the ball when I asked him not to. NO IDEA ! It wasn't until I told him that I almost lost him, that he was so close to getting his head crushed that he got some inclination that something serious had happened. I could not help myself, I just grabbed him tightly and broke into tears. I am ashamed that I cried like that in front of him, but I am more ashamed that I allowed him to get into that situation. God, it happened so quickly, but at the same time everything slowed down and i have never had so much clarity. Thankyou to the powers that be for leaving him.

I guess all I can do now is to be more vigilant and notify the principal. Thanks

   Update on me; well I am still working four to five days a week which has been a real challenge. And as I work in three different locations, in a couple of different roles, my brain gets very confused some days. My children are very well, and seem to be happier than ever before. I think it helps having time apart. When we are together, I try and make it as fun as I can. Though I love my work, I feel intensely guilty about leaving them. I love coming together as a family on the weekends. No rushing to get to school, no homework, no structure. Bliss.

Well, that's it for now. Yep, I am looking forward to signing in tomorrow

x D x

and my daughter

THANKYOU! 

I really don't feel too bad about putting petrol where it doesn't belong now.