Redirect the behaviour. So if she is touching the phone, instead of saying no, take her hand and move her away to another area where she can play with toys. Or give her her own little phone to play with.

Instead of saying no try rephrasing it. Instead of "no don't bang it", say "try and be gentle" while showing the behaviour you want (taking her hand and showing her gentle)

If she is constantly touching the same thing and it's possible, move it out of her reach. If she is always taking your remotes put them higher. This will save stress on you.

Lastly teach her where possible to use things. If she is always playing with the TV or DVD player teach her how to use it. Tell her to press the on button to get the telly to work. If you let her use it properly she will loose interest in playing with it and even gain some independence by putting her own DVD's on like my nephew was at 14 months.

The good thing is, this stage does pass. My 20 month old now says "no" when she is doing things she knows I dont wants her to, but also I often dont have to say no any more as she has learned quite a lot of what I dont want her to do! Of course, she has just moved on in her battle of wills with me, but in parenting, kids just move the goalposts every time you get the hang of them. Or so it feels!

As everyone says, save "NO" for the big things if you can, and try saying "hold it tight" rather than "dont drop it", as I've heard that in kids minds, they often react to the main word, and you dont want her hearing "drop", etc!

And if you feel you're being mean, just balance it with as much praise as possible - catch her doing lots of things right, and the "nos" wont do her any harm at all. Plus you'll notice what a wonderful little girl you have if you are going out of your way to look for things. But they're not called the terrible twos (and trying threes) for nothing, so hang in there, teach her well now so that 6 & 16 more enjoyable.

Good luck!

Don't feel bad about it, thing how much worse things would be later on if you don't start putting your foot down now.

While it is frustrating having a child that squeals and is generally a nightmare, it is actually normal.  They are trying to assert their little personalities on the world, and starting with the primary care giver is where they begin.  I'm sure your husband has been left scratching his head over her behaviour too.

Teething can play a part in this, as we are finding out, as can older siblings.  Just got to keep pushing through and work towards having a child who knows what they want, the best way to get it as well as sweet and polite.

You say no because you love your daughter and want to protect her and only want whats best. Saying no isnt being mean when its said within reason.

So long as you give your daughter lots of cuddles and always tell her you love her she should be fine. Its hard raising a child when their father isnt always with you 24/7 but as she grows older she will appreciate that you and your partner only want whats best for her.

And yes, how you are feeling and what she is doing is normal. This is the age where they start to try to test your limits....and i'm sorry to say this will continue for many years.

1) make sure you do some fun things together so it is not always NO - eg sitting on the floor and playing with her toys, reading together, watching a disk & dancing together

2) pick your battles.  There are so many, sometimes for the sake of sanity it is better to let some lie and only fight the ones that are safety or well-being issues.  That said, there are some things that really get on top of me and I am having to push those a lot at the moment - eg eating at the table, not moving the furniture, packing away toys

Hope that helps!

Try not to say no or don't, eg.  Try distractions, and instead of saying don't touch that, so please come over here and do this instead etc.  It puts both of you in a more positive frame of mind, and when you say don't play with the tv... All she hears is 'blah blah... play with the tv' LOL - good luck, it is a moment in time, and you will get through it best by being positive, proactive and most of all consistent.