Minti - Recent Comments on Question "contacting daughter after 14 years."

Re: contacting daughter after 14 years.

Marglr — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 05:55:14 -0800

So hard but something that needs to be done. Every girl needs her Dad and she needs to know you want to contact her. It might take a while and might be hard but then it also will be worth it. Stress that you are not trying to replace her father but that you would like a chance to get to know her. I wish you the best of luck.

Re: contacting daughter after 14 years.

katierose — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 05:03:52 -0800

Hi there, I can tell you it would be great if you could make some contact. I finally found my birth Dad after 39 years. It took me three years of agonising over whether or not he would want to hear from me after I finally tracked him down. I just did it one day and i am so pleased I did. I knew from when I was 15 that "Dad"was not my Dad and was told no more. I would contact your ex-wife and speak to her about making contact. If that does not work, I would leave it a while and try again through your ex-wife. If all else fails, send your daughter a letter with your contact details so that if she wishes to contact you, she can. If she is already aware that she was adopted by your wifes husband, than she may have imagined many times what you are like and where you are.

Good luck!

Re: contacting daughter after 14 years.

peace613 — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 12:32:58 -0800

Hi,

I agree that you may want to start out by contacting the mother. She is going to have some idea of how your daugter will react.

Also, providing contact information in every form telephone, email, address, would increase her ability to contact you.

Remember, she may have been waiting for you to contact her and be very excited or she may be angry that it has taken you 14 yrs to contact her. Don't be discouraged.

By giving all of your information you leave it in her hands. She can contact you tomorrow or in 10 years. This is another reason that many sources of contact may be important.

I hope that this goes well for you. Please let us know how it went.

Peace613

Re: contacting daughter after 14 years.

Jessgore — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 08:57:32 -0800

I have no experience with this other then I know that my new found cousin who found me though a genes reunited website was very curisous about who her birth parents are. So your daughter might be too.

If I was in your position I would probably write to her mother, and maybe even slip in a letter there for your daughter as well that they could pass onto her, with contact numbers and such. That way if she wants to get in touch with you she knows exactly how to do it.

I wish you the best of luck in what ever you choose to do. I can't imagine it will be easy at first, but you never know unless you try...

Good luck and best wishes.